It Started With A Text
by KEMLEM81
Summary: Post finale literati because Jess needs to know that Rory did fix everything in the end.
1. Chapter 1

**_A/N this is a post finale literati story._**

 ** _The characters are not mine but I hope you enjoy where I take them._**

 **It Started With a Text**

Taking a deep breath she pressed send.

Rory: I met Christiane Amanpour.

Jess: who is this?

Rory: oh sorry, it's Rory. I got your number from Luke hope that's okay?

Jess: I should've guessed.

Rory was regretting her impulse to text him when a second message arrived.

Jess: So did she live up to the hype?

Breathing a sigh of relief she quickly replied, anxious to see what direction this conversation might take.

Rory: she was amazing. I however was in my pyjamas.

Jess: fluffy slippers too?

Rory: you always knew me well.

Jess shook his head as he read those 5 words. He put his phone down on the kitchen table and went to the lounge to distract himself with the emails he'd been putting off responding to. Somehow it seemed a lesser evil than continuing this little chat with Rory as if nothing had ever changed between them. It was too easy to slip back into rhythm with her. He'd made that mistake when she came to the Truncheon opening and he didn't plan on repeating that error in judgement again.

Rory stared at the phone then switched it to silent and buried it in her handbag suddenly sick to her stomach with regret at having messaged him in the first place. She should've known better. With so much up in the air right now she just wanted to do something spontaneous. Had she taken a moment to consult Mr Hindsight he would've informed her that spontaneity and Rory did not always play well together and often involved a darkly handsome, broody guy she used to know. She paced around her room seeing it through different eyes now that she was back here - an unemployed college graduate with nothing but time on her hands. She ran her hands over the banners on her Yale board and wondered for a moment how different her life might be in this moment had she gone to Harvard instead. She'd have never met Logan, she'd have never had to turn down his proposal. She'd probably never have stolen a yacht or dropped out of school or hurt Jess in such an abominable way.

That morning, as she was meeting her idol she couldn't help but think of Jess and how he'd always believed in her. It had been awkward asking Luke for his number after all this time had passed since she'd seen him but he was almost too happy to oblige. Now she wondered if she had done the right thing or if she'd just opened a can of worms with two sticks of dynamite. She would leave him be. If he replied then she would see where it went from there but she would leave him alone, she wouldn't contact him again. Her heart sunk a little at the thought and she felt 17 again, sitting in her room waiting for the phone to ring, waiting for him to call her. She spotted a familiar favourite book on her shelf and pulled it down. Settling back onto her pillows she opened the cover and began to read.

The emails were all sorted, the dishes were washed dried and put away. He'd even changed the sheets on his bed and put away the clean laundry that had been sitting ignored in the basket for the last 3 days. He was too tired to write but too wired to sleep. He wandered back into the kitchen and picked up his phone from where he'd left it a few hours earlier. Reading back through the short conversation he found himself smiling. So, she'd met her idol. Must've been a pretty major event in the life of Rory Gilmore. He allowed himself to indulge in the feeling it gave him to know that she'd wanted to share this with him. Even after all this time she still had a hold over him. Some days he cursed it but other days he was thankful for the way it helped the words appear on the page and allowed him to write. Every creative needed a muse right? He'd meant it when he'd told her he couldn't have written The Subsect without her. Her voice in his head kept him going long after he would've given up on himself. He typed a short reply then switched off his phone and went to bed.

Rory had dozed off, her book resting across her chest, one finger still subconsciously marking her place. When she woke the next morning she dug her phone out of her bag to switch it back on and saw the message from Jess waiting for her. Her heart began to race as she read those 5 words.

Jess: I hope I still do.


	2. Chapter 2

With a smile on her face and a spring in her step Rory took her beloved book to the bridge and wasted the day away in the best possible way. She came to a passage marked by a pair of tiny asterisk and recalled the day she'd made that mark in her otherwise pristine copy.

She remembered the way the sunshine had sparkled on the water and trickled down through the leaves of the old willow tree casting dancing shadows on the ground. She remembered the way he'd just stood there, hands behind his back, still as a silence, watching her as she crossed the grass between them. She remembered the way his lips felt on hers that first time. The way his arms held her for a brief moment, pulling her closer to him as she was pulling away. The whole moment had its own momentum, two magnets colliding then repelling. She didn't stop running until she was back in place, where she was expected to be, ready to walk down Sookie's wedding aisle while her lips still tingled from his kiss and her heart raced in anticipation of more. That night as she'd lain awake with thoughts of Jess, Dean and Washington all competing for top billing she had taken this book down from her shelf to soothe her troubled mind to sleep. Every word took on a new meaning to her that night. Everything was about to change.

Rory shut her book and sat a while enjoying the feel of the warm sun on her back and let her thoughts drift to a different memory. The fitting bookend to her earlier memory of their first kiss was of course the regrettable moment of their last. It was hard to think of one without remembering the other. The scenarios weren't even that different really. Both times she had been unavailable and yet she'd kissed this boy, this man. Somehow he always brought out her impulsive streak which was ordinarily buried deep lest it got her into trouble.

She'd had no plan that night. No malicious intent. No thought beside seeing Jess and celebrating his amazing achievement. As she parked her car outside the bookstore she felt the old familiar butterflies but she ignored them. When it was just the two of them together at the end of the night they returned in full flurry and before she knew what was happening he was kissing her and she was kissing him and then she was pulling away again, just like the first time. Running away again, just like the first time. The difference between the memories was the hope is his eyes - it was there in the first but gone in the last. Two bookends with hope trapped somewhere in between.

Rory hadn't spoken to him again since that night. She didn't know where his life was at. She missed their friendship above all else. He was the one person in her life who was never afraid to challenge her, to wake her up to herself. Part of her still felt like that 17 year old girl, riding in the car, telling him her dreams of being an overseas correspondent, slightly jarred by his honesty telling her he thought it was a little rough for her but then he'd softened the blow by offering to help her prepare for it. Seeing her idol yesterday, meeting her in her pyjamas and fluffy slippers with a Yale degree but no job on the horizon, she'd felt that same sensation. Reality was jolting her back into the here and now. Jess had reassured her once upon a time. At this moment in her life, with everything up in the air she found herself needing to hear his voice again telling her she could do this. She had no right to expect anything from him but she'd messaged him anyway. Sometimes hope had to be borrowed until you found your own again.

Before she could change her mind Rory rose from the bridge and headed toward the post office. She borrowed a pen and wrote a message on the title page before sealing her book inside a courier bag addressed to J. Mariano c/o Truncheon Books. Once again the ball would be in his court but that was okay with her. There was actually something quite endearing about not knowing what tomorrow might bring.


	3. Chapter 3

Jess didn't notice the package until he went upstairs to his apartment after closing up the store for the day. Chris must've brought it up earlier. He looked at the handwriting, recognising it immediately despite not having seen it in many years. It was a book, that much was clear, but he'd have to actually open the parcel to see which book she'd decided to send him. He rarely let himself indulge in memories of her but right now he couldn't help but think about the way things used to be. Even before they were together they'd swapped books and music and opinions and it was that friendship he missed most of all if he was honest with himself. He'd never met anyone like her and never had since either. She just got it and she got him. First the text message out of the blue and now this though? What's going on inside that head of hers? Maybe this is an olive branch. Maybe this is a step towards being friends again. Only one way to find out, he thought to himself as he opened the wrapping to reveal the title it contained.

He scoffed as he saw the cover, old memories creeping into his thoughts making him smile involuntarily. What did Ms Rand have to say for herself this time? Turning the book open to the title page he saw Rory's neat handwriting and let out a heavy sigh.

 _Thank you for helping me find the courage to fix everything and stop living a second hand life._

 _R_

He skimmed through the pages hoping to find something more amongst the typeset words. He almost gave up, he knew it went against all her principles to deface a book, but he felt there had to be something more. When he finally spotted it - a lightly penciled asterisk marking a beginning and an end, like tiny stars barely brushing the page, he put the book face down on the table and walked away. Did he really want to know what she was trying to say to him? What meaning did he hope to find when he read the words she'd chosen for him? Was it her way of saying goodbye? Or was it something else? Was he one of the things she was trying to fix?

He turned back to the table and picked up the book and began to read the marked passage. His heart began to race and his mind became a mixed blur of fury, frustration, relief, and joy.

 _"Love is reverence, and worship, and glory, and the upward glance. Not a bandage for dirty sores. But they don't know it. Those who speak of love most promiscuously are the ones who've never felt it. They make some sort of feeble stew out of sympathy, compassion, contempt and general indifference, and they call it love. Once you've felt what it means to love as you and I know it - total passion for the total height - you're incapable of anything less."_

Jess shook his head and laughed. He put the book back down on the table, with far more care this time, then went over to the bookcase. Reaching up to the top shelf, he pulled out the 4 books concealing his own copy of _The Fountainhead_ then replaced them once he held it in his hand, once again remembering that day on the bridge. He flipped through the pages, bypassing the many notes he'd made along the way, to find the same passage Rory had marked heavily underlined by his own hand. He'd been thinking of her when he'd read those words. Hell, he'd been thinking of her as he'd read every damn word of that crazy woman's fiction. He'd never admitted it to Rory but she was right, he did like it. On some level he even found himself relating to Roark. He'd hidden this book away on that shelf because the notes in the margins would give his secret away if anyone were to stumble upon it. Standing here now though, both copies side by side, it didn't seem such an important secret to try and keep anymore.

Before he could change his mind he hastily grabbed his coat and keys and shoved his feet into his shoes, not even bothering to tie the laces, then went downstairs to the bookstore to grab one of the prepaid book satchels they kept on hand for the occasional phone order. He scrawled her address from memory onto the front then sealed his copy of the book inside. It was two blocks to the nearest post box and he had to force himself to walk, not run. Once he reached it he held the package in both hands, feeling it's weight, studying his own handwriting as if a stranger had written those words there. One quick motion and it was gone, landing with a thud amongst the rest of the letters waiting to be collected and delivered. He shoved his now empty hands into his jacket pockets and walked back the way he'd come, trying to ignore the sick feeling growing inside him.

Back in the apartment he shed his shoes and coat, dropping his keys on the kitchen bench as he headed to the fridge for a beer. He settled himself back on the couch and opened her copy of the book once more and began to read.

 _ **A/N the quote in italics is borrowed from "The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand.**_


	4. Chapter 4

Rory's heart already felt heavy when a parcel arrived for her late the next day. Surrounded by too many options and not enough space to pack everything she wanted to take with her on the bus in her new job following the Obama campaign around the country she had felt an unfamiliar panic rising in her. She was quickly running out of time but had decided a walk would help calm her nerves, clear her mind and then she could get back on track to the task at hand.

The package was sitting on the front stoop, waiting for her. The size and weight gave it away before she even saw his handwriting, returning her book to her. Had he even read the inscription? Had he found the two tiny stars? She sat on the front step holding the unopened envelope trying to ignore the urge to burst into tears. She opened the seal and took her book out, turning it over in her hands. It seemed different somehow. She opened the cover to see her inscription but found it to be blank. She turned through the next few pages and made no attempt to stop the tears from falling as she saw the telltale marks bandied across the pages. This was not her book after all. He had kept his promise and had read it! Not only had he read it but he was now offering her a glimpse into his mind just like before. Maybe there was hope for them after all.

Torn between reading every tiny note Jess had made and the necessary evil of packing, Rory chose the path of delayed gratification - his words would be her reward. To avoid further temptation she carefully tucked the book into the satchel she planned on taking on the plane with her and put it out of her mind for the time being while she focused on her checklist and deliberated over how many sweaters she would need.

The next 2 days passed by in a crazy, colourful, rainy blur. 2 hours earlier she'd been sitting across from her mom in Luke's, drinking her coffee like it was any other ordinary day except it wasn't an ordinary day, not at all. She looked out the window now barely registering the view as the plane carried her through the cloudy blue sky to Iowa. Jess's book lay unopened on her lap, her mind too full of other thoughts to truly treasure his words right now. She just enjoyed the feel of it in her hands, deriving comfort from it like a child would from a cherished teddy bear. She would call him when she landed. She would call him and thank him for his gift and tell him she was out of town indefinitely, perchance he decided to send any other packages her way.

She recalled her mother's advice about where the interesting people sit on the bus. Jess was definitely a back of the bus person but she was somewhere in between. She would never forget the day she'd spotted him on her way to school, sitting by himself in the back seat, looking more lost than she'd ever seen before. She knew something was wrong but she chose not to comment on the canvas duffle on the floor by his feet. It looked far too full for a day trip to Hartford but she didn't want to consider the possibility that he was leaving again. Of all the words he could have chosen in that moment he'd apologised for not being able to take her to prom. Of all the words he should have spoken they were of the least importance. Maybe that was why they were the only ones he could bring himself to say. Sometimes she wished she'd told him she'd loved him. Maybe then he might have stayed.

The the seatbelt light came back on disrupting her from her reminiscing. Rory tucked the book back into her bag and got ready for landing. This was it now, a new chapter in her life was about to begin. She disembarked and found her luggage and walked out of the terminal in a daze. Once the taxi dropped her outside her hotel reality really began to sink in. She found her room and dropped her bags by the bed, collapsing in a heap on the mattress, letting the anxious tears she'd been holding back all day finally fall from her eyes. Taking her phone out of her purse she called the one person who knew her better than anyone and crossed her fingers that they would answer.

 _ **A/N I hope you're enjoying this story so far. At this stage I have no plan for where it is going, I'm just seeing where these characters take me this time around. Thankyou for reading and thankyou especially to those who've taken the time to review as well, I really do appreciate it. Thanks also to the guest reviewer who pointed out an error in the first chapter which I've now fixed.**_


	5. Chapter 5

The sound of his phone ringing disturbed him from the trance he'd been in since he sat down at his desk in the early hours of the morning. He'd woken before the birds today and the words had been flowing out of him in a way he hadn't been able to recapture for months, years actually if he was being truly honest. He cursed the imposing sound but went in search of its source anyway. He found it on the coffee table in the lounge. He didn't even check the screen before answering the call, just held the phone to his ear and grumbled incoherently into it.

Rory: Ummm, hi, it's me, Rory. Did I wake you? If it's a bad time I can call you back later...I'll just let you go...I just...

Jess registered her voice and was swiftly pulled completely back into reality by the familiar, sweet sound. He settled himself down into the lounge, suddenly unsteady on his feet.

Jess: Rory?

Rory: Hi.

Jess: yeah, hi.

Rory: did I wake you?

Jess: nah, just caught me writing.

Rory: oh. Well I'll go. Let you get back to it. I didn't mean...

Jess: Rory?

Rory: yes?

Jess: I needed a break anyway. Talk.

Rory: okay.

Jess waits patiently for her to continue, after all she had rung him, she must've had her reasons.

Rory: I got your package.

Jess: I got yours too, clearly.

Rory: I haven't read it yet. I'm in Iowa. I thought I should let you know I won't be home for a while. In case you decided to send me something else. Not that you would but if you did, for some reason, decide that you might like to send me something, via the post, I wouldn't get it, well not until I'm home next which is all a bit unclear right now and...

Jess recognised her nervous ramble and smiled as he cut her off mid sentence.

Jess: I guess I'll cancel delivery on that nice fruit basket I picked out just for you.

Rory: oh.

Jess: It was a joke Rory. Remember me? Charmingly sarcastic?

Jess thought he could hear her crying quietly in the background. She confirmed his suspicion with a heavy sigh and a sniffle.

Jess: hey, I really was just kidding Rory. What's wrong? Why did you call me? Not that you shouldn't have, I just mean...What's going on with you? Why of all the places in the world you could be right now are you in Iowa?!

Rory: no one else wanted me. I sent out 74 resumes and no one wanted me and then I got offered this job to follow the Obama campaign for an online magazine and I had to take it. I couldn't be a snob again like I was to the Pro Jo because I committed a felony and I have a record and I should've known I wouldn't get the Reston Fellowship when there are plenty of other equally talented writers out there who didn't steal a boat with their ex boyfriend.

Jess's mind was racing trying to keep up. A felony? Rory stole a boat? With her ex boyfriend? _EX_ boyfriend? The inscription in the book suddenly made more sense.

Jess: hey, take a few deep breaths and try and calm down. Then how about we start with one question at a time?

He could practically see her nodding into the phone. He gave her a few moments to compose herself before he asked his first question.

Jess: let's start with Iowa. When did you get in and how long are you staying for?

Rory: about 20 minutes before I called you and a couple of days.

Jess: see that wasn't so hard now was it? Okay, so you're following the Obama campaign does that mean tour buses and hotel rooms across the 50 states?

Rory: yes. I don't know if I can do this. I've only just landed and I already want to go back home. I was so deluded to have ever thought I could be an overseas correspondent. Here I am just a few states away and I'm crying cause I miss my mommy.

Jess: as much as I can't relate on the missing your mommy front Rory, I do know what it feels like to be in a strange place and not know how it's going to go from there. My advice, if you want it, is to give yourself time to settle in, see if you can make it work for you. If you can't, then quit, go home. At least you'd have tried.

Rory: I guess.

Jess: for what it's worth, I don't think you'll quit. I think this'll be good for you. Channel your inner Kerouac for a while, find out who you really are away from that town, those people, even your mother. Give your own voice the megaphone in your mind for a while and see what happens.

Jess worried he might've spoken too frankly but to hell with beating around the bush with her. Rory was not a delicate porcelain doll to be shielded from the world. He really did believe this would be good for her. Time for her to stop living her life through works of fiction and choose to write her own adventure for a change.

Rory: hey Jess? Thank you. I can always depend on you to be honest with me. You can't possibly know what that means to me. Everything just feels so up in the air at the moment. Just know I appreciate it.

Jess: anytime Rory.

Rory: do you really mean that? After... _everything_?

Jess: yes Rory, I really mean that. Even after everything. It is what it is, right? We always seem to find our way back to each other.

Rory: I've really missed being your friend.

Jess: well I guess you won't have to anymore. You know where to find me now.

Rory: yes I do.

Jess felt a sudden need to step back from this little exchange and clear his head. From the texts a few days earlier, then the message in the book, now this phone call - what was he to make of this all? Was she really just reaching out in need of a friend? Was he really able to be that for her? He didn't want to make promises he couldn't keep but he couldn't help the warmth that spread through his chest at the realisation that she needed him and he meant what he'd said, even after everything, he'd rather have her and all the potential drama and angst that came with her in his life than not have her at all. He'd done a lot of growing up and changing over the last few years and was happy with where his life was at now but, until a few days ago, he'd had that nagging feeling of something being missing and right now, in this moment, he knew it was not something but rather someone. That someone was her. Sensibility told him it was time to end this conversation before he gave too much away.

Jess: I'd better get back to work.

Rory: Sure. Okay. Work. You do that.

Jess: hey Rory?

Rory: yes Jess?

Jess: thanks for the book.

Rory: thank you for yours.

Jess: good bye Rory.

Rory: good bye Jess.

Jess waited until she ended the call before switching his phone to silent and tossing it to the other end of the couch. _What are you thinking Mariano?!_ he asked himself, running his hands through his hair, turning it into a dishevelled mess reminiscent of his teenage self. _She's going to break your heart again and you're going to be the one passing her the sledgehammer._ Jess rose from the lounge and went back to his desk and for the second time that day gave in and let the words carry him away.

 _ **A/N anyone new to my stories will notice my chapters are never very long. I like to break the story up as scenes or views change leading to shorter but hopefully less confusing segments. I try to make up for this with frequent updates so you don't lose the flow of the story. Anyway, I hope you're still enjoying this if you're still reading at this point. Like I said last update, I'm not sure where this is going but I'll keep working on it and post more as soon as I have something else worth sharing.**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N I don't usually like to start with a note as I figure you'd rather just get straight to the story but I just wanted to send a massive thanks to DrewSaywer for pointing out the haywire formatting. Fingers crossed it comes out right this time! Apologies to everyone who saw the wonky version first.**_

The first week on the trail flew by for Rory. She'd gone against her mom's advice and decided to sit toward the front of the bus and would alternate between working on her current article, reading Jess's words as they analysed Rand and looking out the big picture window at the scenery around her. She'd made no enemies on the bus but wasn't in any hurry to make friends either. She smiled to herself as she put her headphones on and tuned out the rest of the world for a while.

She'd spoken to Jess only once since their first conversation last week. It had been short and awkward and neither of them seemed to be able to get out the words they wanted to say. That had been 4 days ago and there'd been no contact since. Rory pulled her phone out of her bag, opening it to her last message from him and spent a few minutes deliberating over what to write back. In the end she settled on a quote that she hoped he'd recognise.

Rory: There was nowhere to go but everywhere, so just keep on rolling under the stars.

Before she could think better of it she pressed send and sent the borrowed words across the distance to him. He would understand what they meant, she was sure of that. She went to put her phone away again when a new message came through. She held the device against her chest for a minute, feeling like a silly schoolgirl with a crush on a boy, as she counted to ten before checking the screen.

Jess: The best teacher is experience and not through someone's distorted point of view.

Anyone watching would've been amused by the silly grin that had taken over the serious expression Rory had worn all week as she quickly typed a new quote and sent it back.

Rory: Happiness consists in realizing it is all a great strange dream.

She waited patiently for him to reply, feeling certain he would. Ten minutes passed then fifteen. He's probably just busy she told herself. 32 minutes after she'd last pressed send a new message finally chimed. The sound startled her and she almost dropped her phone but managed to keep a hold of it. She turned it over in her hand and relief washed over her as she saw it was from him. She opened the message and then sat in stunned silence after reading the words he'd chosen to send this time.

Jess: I wished I was on the same bus as her. A pain stabbed my heart, as it did every time I saw a girl I loved who was going the opposite direction in this too-big world.

Oh. Oh! Rory's heart really was racing now. Her hands were shaking and she could feel the heat rising in her face. Oh! Did he really mean that or was it just part of this little quote war? Rory didn't quite know how she felt. On the one hand it had been barely 2 weeks since she'd given Logan back his ring. She'd been sad of course but not as much as she might've thought she'd be. They'd been together for long time, but it hadn't all been perfect and at times it was far from it. She'd done a lot of compromising in their relationship and had made some choices she wasn't proud of but when things had been good they'd been wonderful. Sadly though not wonderful enough for her to be ready for that to be the rest of her life. She was too young to be what he wanted her to be. She had lost herself along the way and needed to find her way back to who she really was and what she really wanted before she could take such a big step with anyone. Was it too soon to be moving on? Was it even technically moving on when Jess still held a piece of her heart and probably always would?

On the other hand she was the one that had started this, sending that text out of the blue as if no time had elapsed and no cheating kiss had occurred. Then she'd sent him the book. What was I thinking? she chided herself. I can't hurt him again. He doesn't deserve that. She remembered their last kiss again, this time forgetting the part where she left. There had been something there, even after everything, there had been that pull, that spark, that heat that she'd only ever truly felt with him. Did she really mean it that night when she'd said she loved Logan or was it a convenient excuse to run away yet again rather than face the complicated truth of her undeniable attraction to this man who was once the boy who'd broken her heart?

She knew she was taking a long time to reply and she knew him well enough to know he'd be deriding himself for sending the words in the first place, opening himself up to her like that, exposed. She chose her next words carefully then hit send.

Rory: Will you love me in December as you do in May?

His reply came quickly this time.

Jess: I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion.

Oh, but he had so much to offer her now, she just had to decide if she was ready to go down that path again.

Rory: One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple.

She smiled when she read his next response.

Jess: Something good will come of all things yet.

She sent him a :) and a X and gathered her belongings together as they approached their next stop on the campaign. One day soon they would park this bus in Philadelphia and she wondered if she'd have the courage to go and knock on his door when they did. Could they speak true words to each other or was everything just context and hyperbole? Time would surely tell.

 ** _A/N all the texts are quotes from Jack Kerouac._**


	7. Chapter 7

Jess did nothing to stifle the laughter that erupted from him as he returned from lunch to find another gift for him taking up half the counter. There was no need to check for a card, it could only be from her. Matt gave him a quizzical look as he approached the large gift basket.

"Am I missing something here?" Matt asked. Jess quickly realised Matt had probably never heard him laugh like that before. He couldn't even remember the last time he had, it was not a frequent happening.

"It's one of those annoying _you just had to be there_ inside jokes and you weren't so no point me trying to explain it to you." Jess offered with a shrug as he took a closer look at the basket of fruit. Pulling his phone from his pocket and taking a gamble on her being on her lunch break he rang Rory's number, still chuckling to himself as he waited for her to pick up. He was about to give up and try again later when he eventually heard the call connect and her harried voice coming through the speaker.

Rory: hello? Are you still there?

Jess walked away from the desk and out to the back storeroom now she was on the line.

Jess: still here.

Rory: oh, hi!

Jess: hi yourself.

Rory: I'm guessing you got your surprise?

Jess: Apparently oranges are not the only fruit.

Rory: well I'm glad I was able to help clear that up for you. I'm sorry it took me so long to send it to you.

Jess: _I seem to have run in a great circle and met myself again at the starting line._

Rory: you never cease to amaze me! You and that incredible brain of yours. To think I ever attempted to tutor you when now I'm the one who feels I can't keep up. I think I shall call you Will from this day forward.

Jess: Will?

Rory: think about it.

It only takes a moment for Jess to figure it out and he laughs at the comparison.

Jess: maybe we could get together and eat a bunch of caramels sometime.

He could so easily imagine her frustrated pout that would soon enough give way to a smile. She'd stump him one day, it was bound to happen, but he wasn't the sort to throw a game to appease his opponent. Besides, he kinda thought she liked it when he got her.

Rory: I might just take you up on that.

Jess: does your driver know the way to Philadelphia?

Rory: I'm sure I could get him a map if he doesn't.

Jess: just do me a favour, let someone else be the navigator?

Rory: and what exactly are you implying? I'll have you know I'm excellent at giving directions.

Jess scoffed loudly but chose not to contradict her.

Jess: I guess I'm just looking forward to seeing you and I don't want you getting lost along the way.

Rory: oh.

The mood between them shifted with that one tiny word. Suddenly all jokes and banter were pushed aside.

Jess: do you know when you'll actually be around this way?

Rory: in a little over 2 weeks time I think.

Jess: and how long will you be staying?

Rory: I'll have to check but I think it might be four days.

Jess knew she didn't need to check, that she'd already have committed the next month at least of her schedule to memory. She was nervous about seeing him, she was trying not to give too much away. He could understand that all too well. They'd each done their share of hurting the other in the past. He had hope that things would be different this time though. Another quote from Winterson's book passed through his mind: _walls protect and walls limit. It is in the nature of walls that they should fall_. Maybe he needed to let his own walls fall down and hope that she would then let hers down too.

Jess: you do that and let me know. I really would like to see you if you have some time to spare.

Rory: I'm sure we can figure something out.

Jess: In the meantime I'll start my search for caramels. Only the best will do for Rory Gilmore.

Rory: I can hardly wait.

Jess: I guess I'd better let you go, get back to the trail...?

Rory: yeah. I'd better get back.

Jess: thanks again for the nice fruit basket.

Rory: you're welcome Jess.

Jess: goodbye Rory.

Rory: bye Jess.

Jess pocketed his phone and walked back into the main part of the bookstore with a silly grin on his face. He walked back over to the fruit basket only this time paying attention to the card nestled amongst the peaches. He opened the small white envelope to see Rory's neat script adorning the plain white card.

 _You're too far away for a smoke signal and I'm still looking for the perfect postcard._

 _I hope this will suffice in the meantime._

 _R x_

He carefully placed the card back in its envelope and tucked it into the breast pocket of his button down shirt for safe keeping. 2 weeks suddenly seemed an unbearably long interval to wait.

 ** _A/N for Janiee - my other reviewers will know I usually try my best to reply as soon as I can and share some little insights but without being able to reply to you directly I just wanted to say here sincerest thanks for your wonderful review, it is incredibly encouraging and really does mean so much to me. I hope you continue to read and enjoy my story. I have a few other lit fics on my page if you're ever looking for something else new to read._**

 ** _The quotes in this chapter are borrowed from Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson. The caramel reference is from the film Good Will Hunting (am I wrong to think there are some definite parallels between Will & Skylar and Jess & Rory?)_**


	8. Chapter 8

As she spotted the sign welcoming the bus to Pennsylvania the nerves Rory had been trying all week to contain suddenly broke free and brought her out in a cold sweat. It was a good thing she was sitting down and even more fortunate it was late in the day and after a long tiring week of city hopping everyone was keeping to themselves, looking forward to the prospect of staying in the one place for 4 nights.

When she'd spoken to Jess earlier in the week he'd suggested he meet her off the bus but she quickly turned him down. There was no way she wanted this first real life meeting, or re-meeting or whatever the correct term was for it, to feature her tired and bedraggled traveler look. After everything that had happened between them lately there seemed to be a good possibility that Jess would see her in a dishevelled state at some point over the next few days but that would be an entirely different circumstance. Rory felt heat rising in her face and knew she was blushing. Yes, that would definitely be different.

She'd finally sent his postcard 3 days ago and it was sure to have reached him by now. She'd lied on the card he would have received with the fruit basket, she had in truth found the perfect postcard just a few days into this job, she just hadn't found the right words to mark it with. 4 days ago when she'd spoken to him the conversation had quickly grown heated as they'd traded Neruda's passionate words. Jess had concluded things before they got too out of hand with one last thought: _and one by one the nights between our separated cities are joined to the night that unites us_ ; and his assurance that no matter what happened between them, he would be a gentlemen and they wouldn't rush things. She'd bid him goodnight, almost letting the words they'd quoted but not actually spoken escape through her lips. She could hear his own hesitation too as his voice sunk to just above a whisper with the promise of seeing her soon. Before she could change her mind she'd written a quote she knew he would recognise, no need for games this time. The postcard was her final peace offering. There would be no more apologies between them just a fresh new page to start a new chapter on, free from all the spilled ink of their past.

They were due to arrive at the hotel just after 6pm and Jess had booked them a table for 8pm at a diner he'd sworn would remind her of Luke's. She didn't care where they went, just as long as he was there. She had been lucky enough to score a room to herself this for this top on the trail and flopped onto the queen size bed too exhausted to do a happy dance but her toes were tapping against the carpeted floor in a halfhearted attempt at celebrating her good fortune. She allowed herself a twenty minute power nap then showered and dressed in the outfit she'd decided upon earlier that day as the bus carried her closer to Jess.

So far everything was falling so easily into place. She stepped out of the hotel foyer and quickly found a taxi, showing the driver the address of the diner before sitting back and enjoying the unfamiliar view from her window. So this was Philadelphia? She'd been here just that one time before but hadn't really taken any of it in. She had driven directly to Truncheon and then directly home again. Not home, Logan's, that fancy apartment had never felt like home to her, not really. She shook all thoughts of her ex out of her head. Tonight was about starting fresh she reminded herself.

"We're here Miss," the driver's voice shook Rory out of her thoughts and back to reality. Looking out the window she could see a diner and the two topiary trees with fairy lights marking the front entry did indeed remind her of Luke's. Rory thanked the driver and paid the fare then exited the taxi, shutting the door behind her.

Feeling like a giddy school girl, unable to contain her excitement as it burst across her face in a joyous smile, she crossed the sidewalk to the three steps leading up to a clear glass door. She barely heard the bell chime overhead as she stepped inside. She barely even registered the smell of coffee and French fries and onion rings. All she could see was those beautiful brown eyes staring into hers and then her feet were carrying her towards him and his to her and she was in his arms and it felt like she'd never left them. She was finally back where she'd always fit best.


	9. Chapter 9

Jess turned the postcard over and over in his hand as he waited for her to arrive. He had found an empty booth in the back but he still had a good view of the door and was alternating between reading her words and checking to see who was walking into the diner each time the bell chimed.

He seemed to be constantly smiling lately and it wasn't doing much for his reputation but he couldn't help it. Looking at the picture of Oak Park with its wide lawns. He flipped the rectangle of card over and read the quote she'd chosen for the umpteenth time:

 _I didn't want to kiss you goodbye, that was the trouble, I wanted to kiss you goodnight, and there's a lot of difference._

Ernest really did have so many lovely things to say about her too. Jess had a postcard for her in his pocket. Just because she had no fixed address didn't mean she couldn't have one of her own. He'd chosen a somewhat tacky, indubitably touristy picture of JFK Plaza but he knew she would love it. He'd borrowed a few more words from Hemingway and written them on the matt side.

 _The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them._

He'd be lying if he said he wasn't nervous to see her again in person. He'd never felt closer to her than he had these last few weeks, trading borrowed words to help explain how they were really feeling. It had always been easier for them to default to discussing what they were passionate about but, if this was ever going to have a chance at working out, long term, they needed to be able to step out from behind their dust jackets and speak the words in their own hearts and minds.

He let out a heavy sigh suddenly feel incredibly nervous. This time when he looked up at the sound of the bell his eyes met hers and her smile lit up the entire room. He stood up from the booth and met her in two strides, his eyes never leaving hers. He put his arms around her and held her as tightly as he dared. He could feel her body melting into his. He felt like he was 18 years old again. Remembering where they were, Jess loosened his grip on her and grabbed her hand in his instead.

"Shall we?" he asked her, gesturing to the booth he'd been occupying just minutes earlier.

Rory let him lead her to the table and didn't let go of his hand even as she sat down, pulling him down to sit beside her. He wasn't about to complain, proximity was a definite advantage of this seating arrangement and he could feel the heat of her denim clad thigh as it rested alongside his. Less pressure for eye contact too, he realised. Maybe someone was feeling a little shy tonight. Maybe he wasn't the only one feeling like an awkward teenager.

"You look nice," he turned slightly in the seat to get a better look at her. "Happy too, you look happy."

"So do you. Nice and happy." she finally spoke.

"Are you nervous?"

"A little I guess."

"I won't presume to tell you what to feel but I have something for you, maybe that will help." Jess pulled the postcard from his pocket, placing it glossy side up on the table and slowly sliding it across to her.

He smiled as she admired the picture, her grin was all the affirmation he needed that he had made the right choice. When she turned it over and read the message she placed it back on the table and let out a tiny sigh.

"It has to go both ways." she looked up at him, studying his face but he couldn't read her eyes just yet, he was out of practice and there was a different level of wariness in them that he hadn't seen before.

"That it does." Jess dared to let go of her hand and wrap an arm around her shoulder in a friendly embrace, kissing her on the side of her head.

"How about we start with something simple? I've eaten here a bunch of times before and I reckon I know what you'll like - would you trust me to order for you?" he asked.

"Sounds like a very good place to start, I'm starving." Rory's stomach grumbled in agreement causing them both to laugh and suddenly any nervous tension lingering between them dissipated and they were just Rory and Jess, old friends, prospective lovers, both just comfortable being in this in between place for the time being.

"Good to know some things never change!" he teased her as he removed his arm from her shoulders and took her hand back into his instead.

Jess signalled the waitress and quickly ordered for the two of them, ignoring the dubious look she gave him after she glanced at his petite companion then shrugged her shoulders as she pencilled all the items down. Jess just smirked at her, Rory's appetite was the kind of anomaly that had to be seen to be believed.

When the food came they ate in comfortable silence, Rory proving her earlier statement to be no exaggeration - she really had been starving.

"That was the best meal I had since Luke's!" Rory exclaimed as she observed the empty plates before them on the table. "Okay, so you've won my trust. What else do you have in store for me?"

"Just let me sort the cheque and then how would you like to take a walk? There's a great little ice cream cart down by the river and I reckon by the time we reach it you'll have about enough room for a scoop or three."

"Sounds perfect." Rory agreed.

Jess put enough bills on the table to cover the food and a generous tip then rose from the booth. He held out his hand to help Rory up to stand beside him again, pulling her into his arms for the second time that evening.

"I can't quite believe you're here," he whispered into her hair.

"You're not getting sappy on me are you Mariano?" Rory teased and even her teasing made his muscles feel like jelly. What the hell was she doing to him? He let her go more abruptly then he'd intended but quickly reached for her hand to reassure the questioning look in her eyes. He opened the door for her and followed her out onto the sidewalk, watching her childlike reaction to the city lights sparkling overhead. They walked a while in silence before Jess stopped and turned to her, ready to lay it all on the line.

"I guess I just know what I want this time around and I'm willing to risk falling down into that black hole again on the chance that we're both ready this time. Are you ready Rory? Are you ready to see what this could be? Forget Rand and Kerouac and Hemingway. Speak to me with your own words, tell me what you're thinking."

 ** _A/N don't hate me too much for leaving it like this. I promise I'll have the next chapter up soon, it's half written already so I'll hopefully be ready to share it tomorrow._**

 ** _The two quotes in this chapter were borrowed from Ernest Hemingway and the one last chapter was from Pablo Neruda._**


	10. Chapter 10

The earnestness of Jess's words brought tears to her eyes and it took all her willpower not to just lean over and kiss him but it was her words he had asked for, the physical stuff had never been their issue and she doubted time had dulled that spark, it was their words that always seemed to let them down. He'd asked her for her words and she was determined to speak the truest ones she could. They walked on in silence for a while longer. When they reached the walkway alongside this stretch of the Schuylkill River, Rory stopped and turned to Jess, ready to answer his questions.

"There once was a time you asked me that. Not quite the same words but the sentiment was the same. I was so surprised and confused and still half heartbroken from when you'd left even though a year had passed and I'd told you I wouldn't pine but I did pine and I hadn't moved on and I didn't say no that night because I didn't love you I said no because I knew I couldn't be who you needed me to be that night. I was set on my own path and I couldn't see myself leaving the security of that known for the unknown you were offering me. So much has changed for me since then. I'm not that same innocent girl anymore. My bags might be all packed but I've still got places to go and I can't just drop everything to stay here with you. That doesn't mean we can't find some way to make this work. Do I think I'm ready now? Possibly. Do I think it's still complicated? Absolutely. Do I think it's worth trying anyway? Definitely. That is if you'll have me - texts, calls, postcards and all."

The words were barely out of her mouth when she felt his lips crashing into hers, dispelling weeks of pent up emotion in one toe tingling kiss.

"So, that definitely still works," Jess broke the kiss he'd started and rested his forehead against hers while he caught his breath.

She could feel his entire body trembling beneath her hands and wondered if hers felt the same to him. She allowed her fingers to run through his hair and captured the happy sigh that escaped his lips between her own as she took her turn kissing him. They stood there until the breeze began to raise goosebumps on the backs of her arms causing her to shiver involuntarily.

"Did you still want that ice cream?" Jess asked her.

"Maybe not. I wouldn't say no to caramels though...that is if..."

"I know a place," Jess's mouth slipped into a devilish grin.

"Shall we then?" Rory prompted him.

She laughed as Jess offered his elbow to her but looped her arm through it anyway, cuddling into his side for warmth. He walked them a little way along the path until they came to a busier area where he hailed a taxi. Rory recognised the address he gave the driver but didn't comment on it. She snuggled closer to Jess and watched the city fly by out the window. His city. Maybe one day it would be her city too.

As they approached Truncheon she began to recognise a few familiar places. She would never admit it to Jess and prove him right in his estimation of her navigating skills but, she may have found herself a tiny bit lost that night when she drove down for his opening and in the end, after driving in circles for half an hour, had to stop to ask for directions. It seemed like such a long time ago whenever she'd recalled that night recently but now, actually being back here, about to step through that front door again, it seemed like only yesterday. She still felt so ashamed when she remembered the way Jess had looked at her as she'd told him she loved someone else. He'd assured her weeks ago in their first proper phone call that he would always be there for her, even after everything. She had to trust that he was being honest with her, and with himself.

Rory could feel the nervous tension building between them again as the taxi drove away leaving them standing outside the door to Jess's building. Jess seemed to be hesitating. She could easily imagine he was second guessing himself, wondering if he was taking things too quickly by bringing her here so soon because similar thoughts were running through her own mind. Feeling bold she squeezed his hand gently, prompting him to look at her. When he focused his eyes on hers she gave him her most reassuring smile and nodded toward the door.

"Don't tell me you changed your mind about those caramels," she teased him lightly.

"I haven't if you haven't," he offered her an out but they both knew in that moment she wouldn't take it.

As they walked through the darkened bookstore together neither said a word. As they climbed the stairs to Jess's apartment he draped his arm across her shoulders and she wrapped her arm around his waist. As they closed and locked the front door behind them Jess hesitated again.

Rory turned to face Jess and lifted his hand to her mouth to place a kiss in his palm. In the dim light she could just make out the questioning look in his eyes but she couldn't decipher it. Rory pulled him close to her, hugging him tight as she whispered into his ear.

" _Sometimes you have to fall all the way to the bottom of the hole over and over and over again to realise that the reward waiting for you at the surface was worth the effort of climbing back out over and over and over again until the ground decided it was ready to hold you there - two feet on the ground, two eyes on the sky. That's when you'd know you'd earned your place in this world. That's when you'd know you'd earned her._ "

"Trying to woo me with my own words?" Jess's voice sounded raw and fragile in the dark room.

"I think the ground is going to hold us both this time. I love you Jess." Rory buried her face in his neck as he hugged her so tightly she almost couldn't breathe.

"I love you Rory. I don't think I've ever cared about anyone or anything as much as I care about you. Even when you hurt me I still loved you. Now, here we are."

"Yes, here we are." Rory lifted her head to meet his eyes.

"Did you still want those caramels?" Jess asked her.

"I think they can wait."

Rory kissed him teasingly at first but then more deeply and allowed Jess to lead them across the lounge and into a bedroom she assumed to be his. He lay her down on his bed leaving her side for a brief moment to lock his door and switch on the bedside lamp that sent a hazy glow across the covers. He kicked off his shoes then removed hers for her and came to lay beside her, running his fingertips back and forth across her bare arms in lazy ellipses.

It had taken them years to get to this point and they felt no need to rush now. They took their time undressing each other, piece by piece. Then took their time discovering each other, inch by inch. When they'd exhausted each other with their detailed exploration Jess wrapped his body around the curve of Rory's back and together they slipped into a deep, peaceful sleep.

 ** _A/N Rory's whispered words in italics are my own imagined quote from The Subsect. Thanks again to everyone who is still reading at this point and especially those who've taken the time to follow, favourite and review._**


	11. Chapter 11

"You are so beautiful," Jess whispered in awe as he took in Rory's porcelain skin, lightly tracing his fingertips over the freckles on her bare back then gently kissing his way along the same paths. The sun was trying to sneak into the room around the curtain edges and he could feel her stirring in her sleep. He'd been awake for a while, just enjoying the early morning silence and the feel of her warm body still nestled into his. It wasn't the first time he'd woken with a woman in his bed but it was the first time he didn't want to let her go. Sex had always just been about physical need to him, nothing more than scratching an itch, but last night with Rory all the cliches about making love had been proven correct and he was dangerously close to turning into a sappy fool.

He'd never wanted to pressure her when they were teenagers and then he left before he even gave her a chance to be ready. He'd thought about her a lot in the years between then and now, imagining what it would have been like to be with her, to be her first. Even his most elaborate fantasy couldn't come close to this near perfect reality. He'd left her then because she deserved so much more than the nothing he had to offer her. It had been one of the hardest decisions he'd ever had to make. He'd handled it all wrong. He'd handled so many things wrong. This was their new beginning though. Last night he'd been more of a virgin than she'd ever been and in all the ways that really mattered she had been his first.

Jess reached for his watch on the bedside table. Holding it up to his face in the dim light, he could see it was quarter after eight - still pretty early but considering they'd not once breached the subject of tomorrow yesterday he had no idea what Rory's schedule was like today. Reluctant to break the spell but knowing it was the right thing to do he began to kiss the back of Rory's neck, pushing her hair aside as he reached her ear. He nibbled on her earlobe before whispering to her.

"Wake up beautiful. It's after 8."

Rory stirred and rolled over onto her back, blinking her sleepy eyes as she took in the unfamiliar surroundings. She turned to see Jess smiling over at her, his cheek still resting against his pillow.

"Hi," she whispered across the tiny space between them.

"Good morning," Jess pulled her into his chest, kissing her on the top of her head and she cuddled into his neck.

"This is definitely better than waking up to a concierge," Rory smiled.

"Oh really? Well maybe I'll have to manage your daily wake up calls from now on, when you're back on the road again. I don't want you hearing any other male voices while you're naked in bed," Jess retorted, only half joking.

"Well, technically I'm usually in my pyjamas but whatever makes you happy Jess," she grinned up at him and he pulled her up the bed so her lips could reach his. As much as he wanted to let them get carried away he quickly broke off the kiss.

"What time do you need to be wherever it is you need to be today?" he asked her.

"You're not sick of me already are you?" Rory pouted sweetly, innocently.

His body stiffened at her words and he let her go, laying back against his pillow staring at the ceiling. Those words, that look, suddenly he was back at that stupid party in that bedroom with its frills and lace. He was hurting her and he was never going to speak to her again except for a handful of words in the back seat of a mid morning bus. He shook his head as if to shake the memory away but a niggle of doubt had slipped into his mind and that remained.

"Hey, I was just kidding Jess. What happened, where did you go just then?" Rory had closed the space he'd created between them just moments earlier and was now looking at him as if she was trying to find the answer to her question etched on his iris.

" _I guess I should have forgotten about it ages ago but forgetting isn't something I'm very good at_."

"Really Jess? Back to borrowed words again?" Rory was pulling away from him, worry working its way across her face. "Two can play at this game Jess. Nick Hornby, right? Well how about this one: _You have to work at relationships. You can't just walk out everytime something goes wrong._ "

Her words stung him but he could see by the pleading look in her eyes that she hadn't intended them too. He was hurting himself with his interpretation of them. She was right, they would have to work at this and he'd been naive to think they could just put the past behind them and start over. Their past wasn't just the regrettable moments, it was also Rand and Hemingway and borrowed books and stolen kisses. He didn't want to forget all of it. He just didn't want to repeat his mistakes.

"Come here," Jess held his hands out to her and when she took them he pulled her into his arms, lining her body up over the top of his. He wrapped his arms tightly around her waist and she rested her head on his chest. "There are some things in our past that I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself for. I'm not sick of you Rory. I don't think I ever have been or ever could be sick of you. I wasn't when you asked me that in Kyle's parents' bedroom but I never got the chance to explain that."

"Oh," was all she had to say, she must've been remembering now too. "Let's not make this about our past mistakes Jess. What happened between us last night? That is our future."

"So you just want me for my body?" Jess joked, trying to lighten the mood he'd so quickly darkened.

"You know exactly what I mean Jess. Last night was perfect. Last night we were just us - Rory and Jess. Not just here..." she gestured at the rumpled sheets that covered them "but from the moment I walked into that diner and you held me in your arms everything else faded into the background and it was finally our turn to just be."

"What time do you have to get to the speech?" Jess asked her.

"It's not until noon."

"You're right, last night was perfect. Everything about last night..." Rory cut off his words with a kiss that quickly got out of hand and they spent the next hour adding more wrinkles to the sheets.

 ** _A/N quote in italics are from High Fidelity by Nick Hornby._**


	12. Chapter 12

As much as she hated to leave him, Rory knew she had to get up and get back to the hotel to get her work bag and then find her way to the National Constitution Centre in time for the speeches. She wasn't here on a holiday after all.

"Jess? I'm going to have to go." she gently shook him, not wanting to leave without saying goodbye.

"Rory? What time is it?" she saw him reaching for his watch and placed it in his hand for him.

"It's a little after 10 but I need to be at the NCC by midday. You stay here, I can let myself out." she saw his eyes registering her clothed state then looking at his still bare body.

"Give me 5 minutes and I'll drive you?" he offered.

"Don't you have to work today?" They really hadn't discussed the next few days at all had they? Rory smiled to herself knowing their time together so far had been much better utilised.

"I may have taken a few days leave..." Rory loved him the most when he was this slightly bashful version of himself and couldn't resist teasing him a little.

"Is that so?"

"I kinda figured you could use some company and someone to carry your bag, fetch you coffee..."

"Make sure I don't sleep through my alarm?"

"That too although that was still in the maybe column up until about 12 hours ago."

"So you'd be like my very own personal assistant?"

"Something like that."

She was powerless to resist him when he smiled at her like that so she didn't even bother to try. She kissed him quickly before shooing him out the door to the shower.

Alone in his room she began to take in her surroundings for the first time. Aside from the bed everything was surprisingly neat and tidy. The only exception was the piles of books stacked haphazardly in one corner. Rory was sitting on the floor reading through the spines when Jess came back into the room, showered and dressed and ready to go.

"There's heaps more in the lounge. You can check them out tonight if you like."

"Tonight?"

"Well, yeah, unless you want me to come stay with you at your hotel? Now that I've got you I don't plan on letting you leave my side until I have to." Rory almost thought she saw him blush as he spoke.

"No, here sounds good. Can I bring my bags?"

"Sure."

"Okay."

"Okay."

Jess checked his watch and held it up for her to see.

"Oh, right, work, job, gotta go." Rory grabbed her purse in one hand and Jess's hand in the other and let him lead her all the way to his car. She gave him vague directions back to her hotel but he just smiled at her and assured her he knew the way.

"You looked it up?" she asked him incredulously.

"Yes." he affirmed, his eyes never leaving the road.

"You looked it up." Rory sighed and sunk back into the seat taking in the city streets in the daylight as they drove across town.

"I love you Jess. Thank you for looking it up." Some seemingly small gestures were in fact grander than diamond rings and horse drawn carriages.

"There's something for you in the glove box." Jess looked at her briefly then returned his eyes to the road.

Rory opened the glove box to find a gold box with a purple label. She opened the lid to see 18 perfect chocolate covered caramels sitting in neat rows.

"So do you mean to tell me I didn't actually need to go up to your apartment last night for some caramels? They were in your car the whole time? Had I known this I might have chosen differently..." she smiled as she saw the grin tugging at the edges of Jess's mouth.

"I didn't know how the night was going to go so I decided I better have all my bases covered."

"So when I go back to your place tonight, am I likely to find more caramels in your kitchen?"

"Perhaps."

"In the lounge room with the rest of your books?"

"Maybe."

"In your room?"

"Yes."

Rory put a caramel in her mouth savouring the velvety smooth chocolate and the salty, sticky centre. She let out a moan of appreciation and saw Jess's hands tighten on the steering wheel.

"Good?" he asked her, meeting her eyes.

"Uh huh," was all she could manage to get out as the chewy sweet stuck her teeth together in a deliciously pleasant mess.

"As good as ice cream in cones?"

"Better."

She reached her hand back over towards him this time placing it on his thigh. Everything was going to be better this time around.


	13. Chapter 13

At Rory's insistence Jess waited in the car for her while she raced up to her hotel room to shower, change and grab her things. He was surprised to see her back, knocking on his window, barely 15 minutes later looking slick and professional in her smart work clothes with her hair pulled back in a neat bun. This woman really was unlike any other he'd ever met. He quickly exited the car and opened the boot, placing her luggage inside.

"Let me guess, that one's full of books?" he pointed at the smaller but significantly heavier of the two cases.

"In my defence I only bought 3 pairs of shoes and a minuscule makeup bag to compensate." Rory admitted defiantly.

"I was merely observing not criticising," he closed the boot and wrapped his arms around her as they stood together on the footpath. "I love you Rory Gilmore, books and all."

"Even Ayn Rand?"

"The cat's already out of the bag on that one but I have been waiting to see how long it would take for you to bring it up."

"You loved it!" her teasing was worth seeing that look of absolute joy on her face.

"Love is a strong word."

"You did, you loved it. I knew it. I knew you'd love it if you just gave it a chance." Jess cut off her words by opening her door and depositing her into her seat. He passed her the seatbelt then shut her door chuckling to himself as he walked back around to his side of the car.

Traffic was pretty heavy as they approached the NCC and they were cutting it fine as they neared the entrance so Jess dropped Rory off promising to find her after she'd parked the car.

"Here, you'll need this," she passed her spare press lanyard to him then leant down to kiss him through the open window. A car honked behind them and Jess let her go, watching as she disappeared into the crowd. He had no idea how he would find her in there but a promise was a promise and he didn't intend to break any of those today.

By the time he found a carpark it was almost quarter past twelve. Realising neither of them had eaten since dinner the night before - caramels didn't count - he backtracked a couple of blocks to a sandwich bar he knew and placed a to go order. He stood by the counter to wait pulling his phone from his pocket to write Rory a quick message so she wouldn't worry about him. It was a foreign concept to him - checking in. He wasn't used to people caring about his whereabouts but he knew Rory would appreciate the gesture so he finished typing out the words and pressed send.

Jess was heading back toward the Centre with two bags of food when her reply came through.

Rory: saved you a seat. Back row left aisle. Handy to exit door in case you get bored xx

If this was what he had to do to spend time with her then he was willing to risk boredom. Besides, he had a book on hand if it came to that and when he was through with his he knew he'd have at least two others to choose from in Rory's bag. He sent a reply and then kept on walking in her direction.

Jess: and miss my chance to watch my very own Hildy in action? No escape hatch required. See you soon xx

Rory was in a state of deep concentration when he spotted her in the crowded forum. He wasn't sure they'd let him in at first and they took longer than necessary to check through his bags from the sandwich shop. He remembered the press card in his pocket and showed it to them and they finally waved him through. He placed her bag on the floor under his feet and settled into the seat she'd saved for him. He watched the way her pen flew across the page noting down every detail possible. She had a mini recorder on her lap too but he wasn't certain it would pick up much from where they sat. He'd safely bet she'd never sat in the back row at one of these things. She was a front of the bus girl and there was nothing wrong with that. If he'd gotten her here earlier she'd be all the way up there taking notes on the shape and size of the first speakers cuff links and the exact shade of his tie. He remembered the reason they had been late and found himself incapable of remorse. He'd make this up to her some other way.

During the short interval Jess retrieved the sandwiches from one of the bags passing one to Rory. She thanked him then began eating in typical Rory style. He just watched on amused, working his way through his own lunch. When she was halfway through he passed her a bottle of water then took it back from her so she could finish eating.

"That was delicious!" she exclaimed as she wiped mayonnaise from her face with a paper napkin. "Thank you for remembering to feed me!"

"There's more if you want it." He passed the second bag to her.

"Danishes? If I didn't already love you I think this would've been the moment to push me over the edge."

"Huh. Is that so? Well if I'd have just known that 6 years ago."

"Umhrmph." Pastry flakes flew from Rory's lips.

"I was already over the edge back then anyway."

This time she was rendered speechless for a reason other than baked goods.

Jess could practically see the thoughts running through her mind but this wasn't the time or the place.

"There's no rush to find out all my secrets Rory, I'm not going anywhere and anything you ask, I'll try my best to answer. I'm kinda hoping that'll work both ways because there are some things I'd like to know about you too."

"Later then?"

"Later."

He brushed pastry crumbs from her shirt then kissed her softly as the next speaker took to the stage. She pouted when he pulled away but he just tapped her notebook and gestured to the podium.

"Aren't you here to work?" he reminded her.

He wished he could forget that detail himself.

 ** _A/N still with me? Thanks if you are. Please feel free to share your thoughts. Is this getting a bit too fluffy or is it just fluffy enough? Two more nights together before Rory hits the road again. It's Rory's chapter next, I hope you're still enjoying the alternating points of view. For the record I've never been to Philadelphia and have no concept of its size or geography short of what Google tells me. I also have no idea how these political addresses work so I took the liberty of adding an interval for the sake of the story because I don't think even Rory Gilmore would eat during an important person's speech. Thanks for reading and following and reviewing._**


	14. Chapter 14

"Um Jess?"

"Yes Rory?"

"Today has been so wonderful but right now I really need to..." Rory hesitated. She didn't want to waste the precious time she had left here with Jess but she had an article to write and a deadline to meet. He'd been right to remind her she was here for work. This had begun to feel, well, comfortable? Escapist? Like some long awaited dream on its way to coming true? There were no perfect words to fit, everything fell short somehow and failed to encapsulate these last 24 hours.

"Need to what Rory? Go? Do you need to go? We brought your bags, remember?" she broke out of her meandering thoughts at the sound of his voice. It was earnest again, bordering on worried.

"Of course I remember. It's just I need to work. I have to mold my notes into some kind of article and get it off to my editor before it becomes yesterday's news."

"Hey, don't let me stop you. You can borrow my desk if you like." Jess offered without hesitation, relief etched on his beautiful face.

"And you're sure you don't mind?" silently promising herself she would write this article in record time and be back to him soon.

"How can I mind Rory? You're here for work, I know that. I'd be lying if I said I don't want you to lose your job but..." Rory cut him off by kissing his boyish smirk.

"Thank you Jess, for everything," she told him sincerely.

"It's a P.A.'s job to keep his employer happy right?"

"That would be one way to look at it." Rory conceded.

"Making sure all your needs are met?"

"That sounds amenable..." How did he do this to her so easily? She'd already forgotten the article that had been her top priority just moments earlier and was now painfully aware of how long it had been since she'd last had her needs met.

She slapped him playfully on the shoulder as he gave her a knowing smile. Damn him and his effect on her. She couldn't help but smile back at him though and she felt herself falling more deeply into love with him. How much further could there possibly be to fall?

"There's spare pens and paper in the top drawer and if you get hungry check the bottom one." He took her hand and led her into his room, pulling out his desk chair for her to sit.

"What will you do while I'm working?" She suddenly felt like a child who didn't want to miss out on any fun by giving in to nap time.

"This and that." he answered vaguely. "Call me when you're done?"

"You know I will." Rory assured him.

"Huh. I guess I do." He bent down to give her one last gentle kiss before turning to leave the room. Rory could tell he was about to say something else but changed his mind and smiled instead before he walked out the door, closing it softly behind him.

Rory pulled out her notes and recording from her bag and got straight to work. It was no easy feat but she managed to put Jess out of her mind for the next hour as she wrote the first draft of her article. It actually came together pretty easily, she was definitely finding her voice but was also aware of keeping her writing interesting and captivating. It would be easy to get stale on a trail like this where everything was understandably repetitive but it was the little details that made all the difference and they were the reason her editor kept praising and paying her. She put down her pen and stretched back in the chair, raising her arms up over her head and letting out a massive yawn. Remembering Jess's earlier instructions she opened the bottom drawer to find a white confectioners box tied with a burgundy organza ribbon. She undid the box, opened the lid and lifted it to her nose to fully appreciate the sweet chocolatey fragrance. She devoured 3 caramels before putting the lid back on then opened her laptop and got back to work.

Another hour passed as she typed then referenced then triple checked for any errors she may have missed. Finally as happy as she ever could be at this stage of the writing process she attached the file to an email and sent it off to her editor. She celebrated her effort with a few more caramels then went to the bedside table where she'd left her phone to charge.

"Finished?" he picked up on the first ring.

"Arriving in my editor's inbox as we speak," she affirmed.

The connection was lost and Rory was about to dial him again when the bedroom door opened and there he was standing there, a tea towel over his shoulder and a sheepish grin on his face.

"Are you hungry?" he asked while she was still processing his presence.

"Have you been here the whole time?"

"Not the whole time but yes, most of it."

"Huh," was all she could manage to say. She didn't know what she'd imagined he would be doing without her but she certainly hadn't expected him to sit around the apartment waiting for her. It was a good thing she hadn't known he was right outside her door though, his door actually, or there would be no sent email and still a night of work ahead of her.

"You didn't answer my question," Jess prompted her.

Rory just looked up at him.

"Are you hungry?" he repeated.

"Isn't that question a little redundant coming from someone who claims to know me better than anyone?" She teased him as she crossed the room to wrap her arms around his waist and snuggle into his chest. He returned her hug, placing a kiss atop her hair before resting his head against hers. They stood there for several minutes enjoying the comfort of the embrace after spending the last 2 hours apart. Rory had no idea how she was going to handle getting back on that bus in 3 days time. Everything was going so well, almost too well. Did they have what it took to make this work when these physical moments were taken out of the equation? She had to believe they were more than their physical connection.

It was Jess who let go first and Rory felt his absence more acutely in that moment than she had all afternoon. He led her into the kitchen and she let out a surprised gasp as she took in the table set for two and the pots simmering away on the stove. The smell hit her senses next and her mouth watered in expectation.

"This is what you've been doing all afternoon?" She asked incredulously.

"I did go out at one point to get a few things but yes, this is what I've been doing while you were busy working." Jess admitted shyly.

"Oh Jess. Wow. This...All of it...I..." she was lost for words again. He'd always had that annoying effect on her. When she spotted the vase of sunflowers on the bench the tears began to fall.

"Hey, shhh, hey Rory?" Jess was back at her side, his arms around her, his voice full of concern. "Did I do something wrong?"

Rory held him tight and reached up to kiss him.

"No Jess, you...this...it's perfect." Suddenly she found her words and they all spilled out at once amidst her tears. "Everything's so perfect Jess. Everything's so perfect and I have to leave in three days and I don't want to leave you now, not when we're finally here and it's like I always thought it could be and you're right, we are just you and I am just me when we're here and I'm so afraid that we're going to lose that when I have to go and we won't be able to hold on tightly enough and one day it won't be enough for you. I won't be enough for you."

 ** _A/N the next chapter will be up really soon I promise_**.


	15. Chapter 15

"Hey, Rory. Remember what you asked me last night? If I'll still have you - texts, calls, postcards and all? I know the terms here Rory, I read the fine print and I'm still signing on the dotted line. I can't promise you it will work anymore than I can promise myself the same. Yours isn't the only heart at risk here Rory. For what it's worth I think we can do this. I really do. We just have to trust each other and talk. We can't go back to our old bad habits of shutting down and walking away when things get difficult because it is going to get difficult at some point Rory but that's just life. Do you remember when I said to you it is what it is?"

He paused for a moment and looked into her eyes as she nodded in affirmation.

"That's us through and through Rory, don't you see that? It is what it is. Right now it is fucking perfect and I'm scared I'm going to screw it all up again but it is what it is and I'm going to take whatever you have to offer me in this moment and just try and enjoy it. I think we owe it to ourselves to enjoy every little bit of happiness we can get Rory. God knows we've both put each other through enough misery already."

Jess stopped to catch his breath and held this clever, witty, talented, gorgeous woman he loved tightly in his arms, feeling his blood pressure returning back to within normal limits. He could feel her relaxing again too and lifted a hand to wipe the tears from her face, tilting her chin up until she met his eyes with hers.

"How about we start this night over?" he asked her. "I brought your cases up and they're just outside the bedroom door. Take your time, take a shower if you want. Dinner will keep."

"I love you Jess," her voice was so sincere it felt like it was stabbing him.

"I know you do," he assured her.

"I'm just scared," she admitted quietly.

"You're not alone in that," he reminded her gently.

"Okay," she kissed him softly then let him go, crossing the apartment to where he'd left her bags.

"Rory?"

"Yes Jess?"

"Never forget I love you too."

"I'll try not to," she promised.

When she disappeared into their bedroom, _his_ bedroom, he turned back toward the stove and went to check on the bolognese he'd left simmering there. He put two sticks of garlic bread into the oven to heat and switched the pot of water onto higher heat bringing it back to the boil so he'd be able to quickly cook the fresh pasta he'd made when Rory returned. Once he'd done all he could to distract himself in the kitchen he went into the lounge, pulled a random book from the shelf and attempted to read.

He was rereading the second page for the fifth time when she opened the door and stepped into the lounge. She looked so beautiful in a simple dress, her hair tied back in a ponytail. She somehow looked 16 years old again and he didn't feel a day older than 17 when she looked at him the way she was looking at him now.

"It's comforting to know some things never change," she smiled as she gestured to the book in his hand.

He turned it over registering the title and smiled back at her. He quoted words without needing even to glance at the page.

 _"The weight of the world is love. Under the burden of solitude, under the burden of dissatisfaction the weight, the weight we carry is love."_

She quoted her own response back to him.

 _"But we carry the weight wearily, and so must rest in the arms of love at last, must rest in the arms of love."_

In that moment everything was back to being perfect again. Jess rose from the lounge and held his hand out to Rory.

"So, are you hungry?" He asked her for the third time that evening.

"Starving!" Rory affirmed with a giggle.

"Shall we then?"

Rory let him lead her into the kitchen. He pulled out her chair and kissed her once she was seated.

"It'll just be a few minutes while I cook the pasta." Jess told her. "I didn't know if you like wine or not but I got a bottle of chianti just in case."

"This is all perfect Jess. Thank you. And yes, wine would be lovely."

Jess opened the bottle and poured them both a glass then began to serve their dinner.

"Wow Jess! This looks and smells incredible. You're full of surprises aren't you?"

"It's just spaghetti bolognese, nothing fancy." Jess shrugged off her compliment easily enough but it was far more difficult to contain the joy that spread through him when he heard the pride in her voice.

They ate in silence, Rory enjoying the food he'd made for her while he enjoyed watching her reactions as she devoured it. Her plate was quickly empty and he saw the question sparkling in her eyes and stood up to reload it before she could speak it aloud.

"There you go, Oliver," he placed the replenished plate back in front of her, laughing as he saw the blush rise in her cheeks.

When they'd both eaten their fill Jess stacked the empty plates in the sink to deal with later and topped up their glasses.

"Movie or talk?" He asked her.

"Movie then talk?" She countered.

"As you wish."

The bottle was empty by the time the credits started rolling but they were both oblivious to the car making its way across the screen to reunite the lovers in the film, they were still catching up on some lost time of their own.

 ** _A/N Quotes in italics are borrowed from Howl and Other Poems by Allen Ginsberg._**


	16. Chapter 16

The next morning Rory woke up in Jess's bed unable to recall how exactly they'd made it there. She rolled over to find his side empty and slipped out from under the covers, tugging her dress from the night before back over her head before venturing out of the bedroom to find him.

The dishes from last night were washed and draining in the rack and the sunflowers were now on the table. Rory touched the silky petals and smiled. She continued her search for Jess but quickly concluded he was not in the apartment. Curious but not concerned, Rory returned to the kitchen to get a bottle of water and found a note on the fridge door.

Back soon with breakfast. J x

Rory decided to get herself showered and dressed while she waited. It was still relatively early but she needed to be across town by 10am and she didn't want to be late 2 days in a row. Jess returned as she was double checking her bag for everything she'd need for today's addresses. It was going to be a long, tedious one compared to yesterday and as much as she wanted his company she was determined to convince him to let her go on her own this time.

"Not planning on doing a runner were you?" Jess asked, taking in her attire.

"In these shoes?" she laughed, raising her foot so he could see the height of the heel.

"Wouldn't be the first time I'd seen you run in heels," Jess reminded her. Rory continued to laugh.

"Well then, you should remember how ridiculous it was last time and realise I have enough self respect not to repeat that spectacle!" What a night that had been. Definitely top 5 on both best and worst moments lists.

"Do you have time for breakfast?" he asked her. She was thankful for the subject change before they ended up opening old wounds again.

"You're stuck with me for at least the next hour."

"Only an hour?"

Rory crossed the space between them and wrapped her arms around Jess's neck, pulling him down for a kiss.

"Jess, as much as I love you being my P.A. and I can't praise you highly enough for attending to _all_ my needs..." she paused to kiss him again "...today is going to be long and monotonous and I don't want you to be stuck there with me."

"Okay." he didn't attempt to argue.

"Okay?"

"Do you still want me to be your chauffeur?"

"I'd like that," she accepted his compromise and went back to kissing him.

"Only an hour then?" he asked her again before trailing kisses along her neck, left bare by the French twist she'd pinned her hair into.

"But I'm already dressed..." Rory offered up a half hearted protest.

"I promise not to mess your hair..." Jess bargained.

She knew it was a promise he couldn't keep but she accepted it anyway and gave in to him.

A little under an hour later Rory was fixing her hair in the car, the breakfast Jess had bought still in its brown bag on her lap, her now cold coffee perched between her knees as Jess tried his best not to make her late for the second day in a row.

Rory got out of the car and brushed pastry crumbs from her skirt as she came around to the driver's side door. She bent down to kiss Jess goodbye through the open window then stood up straight, hoisting her heavy bag onto her shoulder.

"Call me when you're done?" he asked her.

"Absolutely," she kissed him one more time. "Go, enjoy your day. I'll be all yours again in a matter of hours and tomorrow I'm free all day, there's a dinner I'm supposed to attend in the evening but that's not until 7."

"Hey Rory?" Jess held his watch up for her to see it was dangerously close to ten and she was indeed going to be late again.

"You're a bad influence on me Jess Mariano!"

"Glad to be of service."

She didn't have to see his smirk to know it was there nor did she have to see the laughter in his eyes as he watched her run across the lawn and onto the path leading into the venue for today's speeches. _Focus Gilmore, eyes on the prize_ , she could hear Paris's voice in her head but the words confused her because the prize was currently driving away in his beat up old Ambassador.

As she'd predicted, the day was long and monotonous and she was relieved Jess hadn't come along. She packed up all her notes and went to call him to come and pick her up but the weight of her bag as she hoisted it back onto her shoulder made her take a literal step back and pause for a moment. If she called Jess now she would certainly get distracted by things far more enticing than politics and would then be pushing it to make her deadline. If on the other hand she found somewhere to sit and at least get her draft done while it was still fresh in her mind then she'd be able to properly relax and enjoy their evening together.

Deciding to put her work before play, for now, she exited the building, blinking at the still bright afternoon light and looked around for a place to go. Deciding she could do with some sunshine and fresh air after being indoors all day, she asked a passer by for directions to the closest park. As she neared its entrance she noted the name on the sign and shook her head in equal parts amusement and disbelief. All roads really did lead to Rome.

The sun was on its way to setting when Rory packed her laptop away and took out her phone to call Jess. She'd worked for longer than she'd originally planned but now the article was complete and sent and she could put work properly aside for the next 24 hours.

Jess answered her call on the second ring.

Rory: You'll never guess where I am.

Jess: Philadelphia?

Rory: Yes but where exactly in Philadelphia?

Jess: Do I get any clues?

Rory paused for a moment thinking of what to say without giving the game away too easily.

Rory: It's somewhere we've been before but elsewhere.

Jess: Is that some kind of riddle?

Rory: Perhaps.

Jess: Indoors or outdoors?

Rory: Outdoors.

Jess: Concrete or grass?

Rory looked around before answering him.

Rory: Umm, both?

There was silence on the other end of the line then he was back.

Jess: I'll meet you near the statue of our first president.

It was her turn for silence now.

Rory: How?!

Jess: I just figured you wouldn't have wanted to walk too far in those heels and I know Philly's version of Washington Square Park is just a couple of blocks from where I dropped you this morning.

Rory: Huh. With deductive reasoning like that you could've made a fine detective.

Jess: Yeah? Shame they don't really like the non-law abiding citizen types at the academy.

Rory: Yes, it is a shame. You'd look good in a uniform.

Rory let her mind conjure an image of Jess in uniform, his messy hair in stark contrast to his shiny shoes.

Jess: Um Rory?

Rory: Yes Jess?

Jess: How about I leave you to your little daydream and start driving in your direction?

Sprung.

Rory: Okay.

Jess: See you in 15?

Rory: I'll go see if George has any thoughts to add for my next article.

 ** _A/N so this ended up being mostly filler but I hope you liked it anyway._**


	17. Chapter 17

Jess was anticipating a tired Rory after her long day and was surprised to find her still standing and still smiling when he spotted her by the Washington statue. He kissed her then took her heavy bag from her shoulder, looping the strap up over his instead and reached for her hand with his spare one.

"Long day?"

"I missed you," her voice sounded tired.

"Want to get pizza on the way home and then I'll leave you in peace to write your article?" he offered.

"It's already done, sent. That's why it took me so long to call you. No more work for me for 24 hours. Pizza sounds good though."

They walked to the car hand in hand, enjoying the sounds of the evening arriving. Rory's energy seemed to disappear once she was strapped into her seat and Jess looked over to her, concerned.

"You look beat. How about after pizza we get an early night?"

He could see she was about to protest but cut her off before any words left her tired mouth.

"You said yourself we've got the entire day tomorrow."

"I am pretty tired," she admitted. "It's been a big couple of days."

She wasn't wrong. It had been a big couple of days for him too, physically and emotionally.

Back at the apartment, after eating their dinner, Rory could barely keep her eyes open so Jess picked her up from the couch and carried her through to the bedroom. He'd already pulled back the covers for her and now began to undress her carefully, folding her clothes over the back of his desk chair. He tucked the covers around her as she snuggled into the pillow. He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead then went back to the lounge to tidy up the empty pizza boxes.

He hadn't really had a chance to miss her today if he was honest. He'd come home and sat at his desk and began to write and had spent the majority of the day like that. He'd made up for it by checking his phone more times than he cared to admit as the afternoon wore on, after he'd grown weary of words for the time being. He wasn't weary anymore, in fact he felt wired. Careful not to disturb Rory from her slumber he took the notebook he'd been writing in earlier and a couple of pens from his desk and shut the door quietly behind him as he retreated to the lounge.

With his muse asleep in the next room the words flowed as easily as water from a faucet. The story he was working on at the moment was the same one he'd begun to write weeks earlier after the book exchange but before their first phone call. He'd been making steady progress with it since and was well on the way to having some semblance of a first draft to share with Matt and Chris. He'd been in a pretty dark place when he'd written The Subsect and he knew it showed throughout the novel but he'd underpinned it all with the ever elusive but also attainable concept of hope. This book would be different because he himself was different. This time he found himself smiling as he wrote where last time he'd given himself headaches from frowning for hours on end. It wasn't so much a sequel as a bookend - the strength of each made greater by its counterpart. His working title was "The Light and the Dark" based on a thought he'd once overheard from one of his mother's hippy friends: _some times we have to experience the dark so we can appreciate how light the light is._

It was almost 2 in the morning when Jess was woken by a small cold hand brushing his hair off his forehead and pressing a kiss in its place. He stirred at her touch and opened his eyes, blinking as they adjusted to the dim light from the window.

"Rory?"

"I woke up and you weren't there," Rory's voice sounded childlike.

"I was writing, I must've dozed off," Jess looked down to see his notebook laying open on the floor where it had fallen from his lap.

"Come to bed?"

"Lead the way," he got up from the couch and followed her into their room. He removed his outer clothes and slipped between the covers, meeting her in the middle. He pulled her into his body, wrapping his arms protectively around her and they both fell swiftly back to sleep.

It was after 10 when he woke the following morning. It was his turn to wake up alone this time. He could hear the sound of the shower running and lay back against the pillow debating whether he should leave her be or go and join her. It was a short but decisive argument and he quickly made his way to the bathroom to bid Rory a good morning.

The second time he woke up that day it was almost noon but she was right there beside him where she belonged, her hair still wet from the shower leaving watermarks on her pillow.

"I think this is what I'm going to miss the most when I go," he could hear her words but couldn't see her face. He hadn't realised she was already awake and briefly wondered how long she'd been lying there thinking.

"Ditto." he agreed rolling her over onto her back so he could see her face.

"I don't mean the sex part. I mean, I'll miss that, of course I'll miss that. I just mean..."

"Rory? I know. I'm going to miss this too." He pulled her into his arms and held her there so she would know he truly did understand.

"Jess? Can we just stay here like this for a while?" Rory asked him shyly.

"We can stay here all day if you like. I _was_ thinking of taking you to the Rosenbach today but it'll still be there next time," he admitted.

"You made plans?" she asked.

"It's not like I made any reservations or anything."

"But you made plans!"

"I did find out however if you give advance notice they let you touch some of the really old books so maybe it's better we leave it til next time anyway."

"Maybe..." Jess could tell she was torn between staying here in bed with him and going to explore the literary museum.

"There's somewhere else I wanted to take you as well and there'll be enough time for that. Why don't we stay here a while longer then pick up a late lunch on the way?" he suggested.

"I like that plan. The books can wait til next time." Rory agreed, snuggling back into his chest.

 _ **A/N the quote in italics is from a beautiful friend of mine who is one of the most inspiring people I've ever had the privilege to meet.**_


	18. Chapter 18

Jess took her to the park from her postcard and she looked up at the giant sculpture and laughed.

"It's so..." She searched for the perfect adjective.

"Tacky?" Jess supplied.

"No, I was going to say shiny," Rory turned to him. "I love it."

"Why am I not surprised?"

"Do you know what would really make this perfect?" she asked, a coy smile on her face.

"Um Rory, need I remind you this is a public place and, as I recall, you already have one black mark against your name."

"I didn't mean that, Jess!" Rory smacked him playfully on the shoulder.

"You never did tell me how you got said mark," Jess reminded her, curious but not probing.

"I'll make you a deal - you agree to the thing I want to do and I'll tell you all about the time I spent a night in a prison cell."

"I'm not sure I should accept such vague terms. How do I know you're not going to try and corrupt me? Take me with you on your downward spiral into a life of crimes and misdemeanours?" He melted her when he bantered with her like this. He always could keep her on her toes.

"What if I promised you the thing I want you to do is in no way against the law?" she bargained.

"Well, okay then, I guess."

"Okay?"

"You might want to get on with it before I change my mind." he warned her but there was no malice in his voice and he was still smiling. She was getting used to seeing him smile and she liked it.

"Will you let me get a photo of us?" Rory held up the small digital camera she'd pulled out from her bag.

"A photo?" he asked warily.

"Just one. Maybe in front of the fountain?"

"And then you'll tell me about your criminal past?"

"Yes," she looked at him through her Bambi eyes, just in case he needed further convincing.

"Hey, no need to use those on me, I'll do it." he agreed. "I do however have one additional condition."

"And what might that be?"

"You print a copy for me too." Jess shrugged shyly and Rory threw her arms around his neck and kissed him.

They found a friendly enough looking passerby and asked them to take their picture. Rory showed her which button to push then practically skipped back to Jess's side, snuggling into him as the lady captured this moment for them forever: Rory with her beaming face looking straight into the lens, Jess with his arm around her shoulders, kissing her on the top of her head.

They bought hotdogs from a vendor then settled onto the grass, enjoying the sunshine and just watching the people passing by. When Rory had finished eating she turned to Jess, ready to fulfil her end of the deal.

"I stole a yacht."

"Huh. You mentioned that once before, I kinda figured that was the felony. What I don't get is why and also how?"

"I'd had a particularly bad day and ended up at a party on a fancy boat at the marina with Logan and I felt like knocking people's hats off so we took to the sea."

"In someone else's fancy boat?"

"Yes,"

"Okay. So why did you feel like knocking people's hats off in the first place? It just doesn't sound like you Rory." Jess told her honestly.

"Mitchum Huntzberger, you know the one? Newspaper magnate, also known as Logan's father? He told me I didn't have _it._ "

"Didn't have what?"

" _It_. He told me I wasn't cut out for journalism but I'd make an excellent assistant," Rory couldn't hide the hurt from her voice. She'd made her comeback but the memory of his words still stung and the aftermath was the worst time in her life.

"Can't say I'm surprised to discover the blonde dick's father was also a jerk. You know he was wrong, right? Rory? You know that right?"

"I do now. It took me a while but then this old friend came to visit me from out of town and shouted at me in an alleyway and made me wake up to myself."

"Oh," was all he could say.

They sat in silence for a moment, Rory let him think over what she'd just told him.

"So that's the reason you dropped out of Yale? The thing with your mom? The DAR?" Jess suddenly looked angry.

"It's in the past now," Rory tried to soothe his mood.

"I knew that guy was a jerk but how could he have just stood by and watched you give up everything you'd worked for?"

"Well, lucky for me you showed up instead," Rory's told him sincerely. "I really don't know where I'd be right now if you hadn't."

"Well it's a good thing I did then isn't it?" Jess leaned toward her to kiss her gently.

"Thank you Jess. Thank you for showing up and thank you for knowing me and not being afraid to call me out on things. I love you."

"I love you too Rory," Jess kissed her again. "I guess it's your turn to ask me a question now."

"Oh, okay. Just give me a minute to think," Rory shuffled possibilities in her mind before settling on one thing she'd always wondered about.

"Was it really you on my graduation day? The phone call?" she was almost certain it had been but had never definitively known.

"Yeah, it was me," his voice was low and raw.

"Why didn't you say something?"

"I just couldn't. There wasn't anything I could say to fix what I'd done. I knew I wasn't coming back so what right did I have to even call you in the first place?"

"So why then? Why did you call me?"

"Because you skipped school to come find me in New York. Because you recognised the lyrics. Because you told me I could do better. Because even when a stupid swan spoiled everything you still wanted to be with me. Because suddenly I'd gone from having everything to having nothing. Because it was your graduation day and I knew how much that meant to you...Because I loved you."

"Oh Jess," Rory looked at him through tear filled eyes. "I wish you'd been able to tell me all of that."

"I know Rory, but that's probably why I couldn't. I needed to set you free."

Rory moved closer to Jess, cuddling up to him, wrapping her arms around his slim waist and sighing. She sat there thinking of all the unspoken words between them.

"Swan?" she turned to him, suddenly registering that one detail didn't make sense.

"I do believe it's my turn to ask you another question now," Jess avoided her eyes.

"Okay, ask away but remember you're next." she warned him.

"Why was Dean at your dorm room that night?"

Rory paused before answering. It was a question she'd asked herself a lot.

"Because he wasn't you," her voice was quiet but she knew he'd heard her because suddenly she was no longer in his arms and he was sitting looking at her so intently she almost wished she could take it back.

"You're going to need to explain that a little better Rory," Jess prompted, his voice still level.

"I screwed up okay? School was hard, I was so lost and lonely and I missed you so much at first and just when I was feeling like I might have been getting over you, you just show up out of the blue and tell me you love me and then you drove away. You just drove away Jess! You loved me and you still couldn't stay. Things started to slowly unravel and my mom was so busy getting The Dragonfly up and running and Paris was sleeping with a professor and Lane wasn't there anymore but Dean was." Rory paused for a breath and wiped tears she hadn't realised she'd been shedding from her eyes. Jess took her hands in his and silently prompted her to continue.

"That night I'd been at this stupid bar with these stupid drunk guys and I needed rescuing and it was Dean's number I called. He came and got me and was just dropping me back to my dorm when you arrived. Nothing had happened between us at that point - he was just saving me from becoming another drunk driving statistic. So that's why he was there."

"At that point? So something happened between you after that?" Rory couldn't bring herself to look at him, she was so ashamed. Was this question thing really going to help or hinder?

"I thought it was my turn now." she segued.

"Sure, ask away,"

"I want to know about the swan," Rory was startled by the laughter suddenly erupting from Jess, in stark contrast to the mood of just a second ago.

"You want to know about the swan huh? I have to admit, I'm pretty surprised Luke never spilled. I guess he's proven his trustworthiness after all, even if he did steal my car once."

"Don't try and change the subject Jess,"

"Okay. Remember that night I showed up at you grandmother's house with a black eye?"

"Definitely one of the more memorable nights I've spent at the Gilmore mansion." Rory confirmed.

"It wasn't a football, I got beaked by a swan."

"I've never heard the word beaked used as a verb before," Rory had new tears in her eyes now, only these were from laughter.

"That's exactly what Luke said. Are you sure you haven't heard this story before?"

"Don't you think I'd have brought it up by now if I had of? Oh wow, I can't wait to tell my mom! You got beaked by a swan!"

"And this is why I didn't tell you,"

"Well maybe if you had've that night would have ended differently. You do remember my mother was out of town? I didn't have any specific plan but I did think you might end up staying with me that night." she admitted.

"Is that so? Huh, that black eye really did screw everything up. Looking back I kinda felt like that was the beginning of the end." she could hear the regret in his voice.

"Maybe, but Jess, this is our new beginning now and I don't know about you but I don't see any end in sight." Rory kissed the spot from which his black eye had long since faded. "Maybe that's enough questions for today."

"Are you trying to get out of telling me what happened with Dean?"

"Believe me when I say you don't want to know. I wish it had never happened and would like to forget it ever did," her tone suddenly low and serious.

Jess just looked at her shocked, he wasn't stupid, he'd figured it out.

"You? With him? Wasn't he married?"

"Jess...it was a mistake."

"Geez Rory. I mean I...you know what, it doesn't matter. It's done, can't be undone. Let's just forget about it."

"It should've been you Jess," Rory whispered, hiding behind a curtain of hair.

"Maybe, maybe not," he brushed her hair aside and tilted her chin to look into her eyes. "I think you're right about one thing though, that's enough questions for today. We should be getting back anyway, you've got your dinner and I'm keen to get back to my writing."

"Trying to get rid of me?"

"Not at all. Just trying to keep us both employed," Jess stood and stretched his legs. When he reached out his hand to Rory she took it and allowed him to pull her up into his arms.

"I can't believe I have to go tomorrow." she lamented.

"Yeah, I've kinda gotten used to having you here," he admitted.

"I've kinda gotten used to being here," she agreed.

"I was going to give you this later but now seems as good a time as any," Jess held her with one hand while the other reached into his pocket pulling out a key. "So you can let yourself in after your dinner tonight, and well, any other time you like."

"Wow Jess. Thank you. This is..." she couldn't come up with the right word.

"The way I see it you won't be back in this neighbourhood again for months so if I change my mind I've got plenty of time to change the locks," he teased her but she knew he was just trying to make light of his gesture.

"You made me a key," she was happily stunned.

"Well technically the locksmith over on 15th made it."

"You know what I mean," she turned the key over in her hand and it shone brightly in the afternoon sun.

"I love you Rory,"

"I don't think I'm ever going to tire of you saying that,"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Come here," Jess pulled her back into him, taking the key from her hand and slipping it into the back pocket of her jeans. He wrapped his arms around her waist and looked deep into her eyes before kissing her in a way that made her body feel like it was on fire. "Let's go home."

"You may have to carry me, I don't think my legs work anymore," Rory gave him a pleading look.

"Is that so?" Jess grabbed her bag in one hand and then hoisted her over his shoulder, carrying her all the way to the street despite her shouts of protest. He put her down when they reached the road and gave her his most innocent smile while he flagged a taxi.

"Let's go home," she repeated his own words back to him and they felt so right she didn't even bother to try and analyse their meaning. She was leaving him tomorrow and there'd be plenty of time for overthinking things once she was back on the bus.


	19. Chapter 19

Jess told himself he wasn't waiting up for her. He'd given her a key, she could let herself in. He just wasn't tired yet. He kept himself occupied reading back through the draft he was working on. He made corrections and added additional thoughts as he went but when he reached the end he found himself unable to continue. It was far from finished but the thread had escaped his grasp. He just had to hope he'd find it again soon.

He tossed the notebook across the room and flopped back onto the couch, resting his head against one arm and propping his feet on the other. He was tired, frustrated, lonely. Geez, she'd been gone for barely four hours and he missed her. He wasn't in the habit of missing people but he'd had plenty of experience over the years of what it was like to miss Rory Gilmore and those piercing blue eyes and that innocent smile and her incredible mind. He was turning into such a sap! She'd called him on it when she first arrived and she was right. She had a way of being so annoyingly insightful but other times she was frustratingly obtuse.

He'd fallen asleep at some point and woke with a start, realising he was still in the lounge. He switched on a lamp and checked the time. It was 2am! Where was Rory?! Quickly making his way across the room to check if she was in the bedroom he felt panic begin to rise from the pit of his stomach to his solar plexus leaving him breathless, as if someone had punched him. The bed was empty. She had not returned.

Searching around for his phone took longer than he would've liked and the mild frustration he'd felt earlier in the evening took on a different intensity. He eventually located his phone in the kitchen and checked the screen for any sign she might have called but the screen was blank, just the digital time staring back at him telling him it was now 2:14am. Where are you Rory?! Where the hell are you?!

He dialled her number 3 times before someone answered.

Jess: Rory? Are you there?

A stranger's voice came across the line.

Unknown: she's here but she's not in a good way. Are you Jess?

Jess: is she okay? Is she going to be okay?

Unknown: nothing a good sleep won't fix.

Jess: is she drunk?

Rory drunk? Why? Why would she go out and get wasted when it was their last night together?

Unknown: a dozen shots of tequila will do that to a person. I'm going to just assume you're Jess even though you didn't answer me. I'm Annie, I'm working the campaign with Rory.

Jess: where are you? I'll come and get her.

Annie: Silk City. Do you know it?

Jess: I'm on my way. Hey Annie?

Annie: yes Jess?

Jess: thanks for answering her phone. Thanks for looking after her.

Annie: us small town girls have to stick together in these big cities.

Jess: well, I appreciate it. I'm going to hang up now. Don't go anyway. I'll be there soon.

Annie: we're camped out on a lounge out the back. See you soon.

Jess disconnected the call and ran his hand through his hair, only then realising he was shaking. He went into the bathroom to splash water on his face in an attempt to calm his frazzled nerves. He patted his face dry with a towel that smelt of her shampoo and let out a mournful groan. How could he bear to let her go back out on the road when he wouldn't be there to come and rescue her? Next week was New York but then she went onto God knows where for God knows how long and the thought of her, drunk and lost and alone in a strange city made him want to retch. I guess this is what Bukowski was talking about - he sure did feel like his bones were breaking but he wasn't feeling like laughing yet.

Jess managed to find a parking space just a couple of blocks from the bar and ran the rest of the way there. They guy on the door waved him through and Jess headed directly to the back where Annie had told him they'd be. His momentum had slowed only slightly from his run but when he spotted her in the dimly lit corner he stopped in his tracks. He bit on his knuckle to stop a cry from escaping his mouth as he took in the sight of her pale and limp as a ragdoll. Her eyes were shut and he told himself she was sleeping, not passed out. He snapped out of the moment and saw a woman he could only assume was Annie looking at him questioningly. He nodded in affirmation then slowly crossed the remaining distance between them.

"Has she been passed out for long?" Jess asked Annie, his eyes never leaving Rory.

"Well, you certainly live up to her description of you. I'm Annie and no, not too long. Maybe 20 minutes or so?"

"Is it just the two of you left here?" Jess looked around vacantly, unsure what he was even looking for, it wasn't as if he'd met any of Rory's bus buddies and they weren't likely to be wearing their press badges in a hipster bar on a Saturday night.

"Everyone else went home over an hour ago. Rory wanted to dance so we stayed." Annie shrugged back at him and the movement irritated him.

"I'm parked two blocks over, I'll drop you back to your hotel. Can you carry Rory's bag? Where's her coat? She went out with a coat. Rory hates losing things, we have to find it." Jess himself felt like he was losing something, most likely his mind this time. He'd already lost his heart and the person who was supposed to be holding it safe for him had written herself off with a bottle of Jose Cuervo.

"Hey, it's okay Jess," Annie touched him lightly on the arm, bringing him out of his freak out and back into the room. "We checked our coats on the way in. You take her, I'll get the coats and meet you at the front door."

"Okay," Jess nodded in agreement. He picked Rory up in his arms, one around the back of her shoulders and the other under her knees - a classic hero hold - but in that moment he'd never felt more like a villain. He couldn't shake the feeling that this was all his fault. She looked so innocent, oblivious, childlike. He kissed her forehead and the sensation caused her eyes to flutter open in confusion.

"Jess?"

"Shh Rory, I'm here. Time to go home." Jess kissed her again as her eyelids shut once more, a smile now crossing her face.

"Home is where the heart is," Rory whispered, her eyes still closed, her mouth still smiling.

Before letting Annie out at the hotel Jess asked her about the schedule for the next few days, Rory was due back on the bus in a little over 5 hours time and he knew that wasn't going to happen. New York was next up. He wasn't due back at work until Monday morning so he could get her there.

"Hey Annie?" Jess called after her as she stepped away from the car.

She turned around to look at him.

"Thank you." he told her sincerely.

Annie just nodded and smiled a knowing smile before responding.

"I'd tell you to take care of her but it'd be redundant. See you in New York."

"Yeah. See you tomorrow." Jess agreed.

He waited until she had entered the front door and was safely in the lobby before putting the car back into drive and heading back home. He looked over his shoulder to check on Rory, still sound asleep stretched out on the back seat. He could practically hear her saying those words of so many years ago: _if you care about me at all...I don't mean care...if you like me at all...not like, like..._ Annie was right, telling him to care was redundant. Even back then, when he barely even knew Rory, he'd cared far more than he ever would've admitted to anyone.

 ** _A/N these two will be parting ways very soon, I couldn't help but give them just one more day._**

 ** _The Bukowski quote Jess is referring to is: love breaks my bones and I laugh._**

 ** _Thank you_** ** _Guest_** ** _for your guest review, so glad you like it and my style. Thanks for reviewing. :)_**

 ** _Thank you_** ** _Jesse_** ** _for your guest review. I'm so happy to know you think I'm getting their voices right. Thanks for reviewing I hope you continue to enjoy this story. :)_**


	20. Chapter 20

Rory awoke to find a note on the pillow where Jess's head should have been. She let out a tiny groan as she rolled over to pick up the slip of paper and she strained her eyes in the dim light to read his message.

 _Take the aspirin, have a shower, I'll be back soon with burritos._

 _I'll drive you to New York when you're ready._

 _J x_

Rory's head was beyond aching and she had a sudden flashback to the night before. She followed Jess's instructions and swallowed down the two aspirin he'd left on the bedside table with the still warm cup of coffee he'd made for her. She stood under the shower until her head started to clear then shut off the water, stepping out onto the mat. As she dried herself she caught sight of her face in the mirror, still etched with the worry she'd felt the night before. Apparently 12 shots of tequila wasn't enough to take it away. Turning her back on her reflection she went back into the bedroom to get dressed. She collected her various items from around the apartment and re packed her bags, propping them against the lounge wall where Jess had put them just a few days earlier.

She walked over to the bookcase, she never had got around to checking out the rest of Jess's collection. Time was not on their side in so many ways. She spotted Jess's notebook on the coffee table and picked it up, turning it over in her hands, debating the ethics of reading his words without his permission. She decided he would let her read it when he was ready and bent to put it back where she'd found it. A scrap of paper fell from the book, an old receipt from a sandwich shop. She smiled when she saw the danishes recorded there and recalled the moment she'd wondered how much further there was to fall. She turned the paper over and saw his familiar scrawl on the back.

 _Not all luggage can be packed in zippered cases. Some things are far too delicate for that. I gave her my heart to carry with her and trusted she would know where to keep it._

This was exactly what she was afraid of. She let the tears she'd tried to drown last night fall freely this time in the privacy of Jess's apartment. She had no idea how long she stood there, clutching his words to her own heart. It was the sound of the key in the door that eventually shook her out of her moment of misery. She didn't make any effort to hide her tears or the piece of paper that she accidentally read. Jess put the takeaway packets on the table in the kitchen then approached Rory quietly.

"Hey, are you okay? I didn't mean to take so long. I decided to get you a cheeseburger too."

"This fell out of your notebook," Rory held the page out to him.

"Oh. I'm assuming you read it?" he asked, taking the slip of paper from her, his tone not giving anything away.

"Not your book, only that," she assured him.

"I thought you'd have known better than to read the last chapter first," he joked but Rory could tell he felt uncomfortable. She'd unintentionally crossed an invisible line.

"I...it was an accident. I wasn't..." her eyes pleaded with his for understanding, forgiveness.

"It's okay Rory, honestly. I trust you," his eyes softened and she knew he was speaking the truth.

"It's really beautiful Jess. Your words are always so moving and inspiring to me," she stepped closer to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and enjoying the warmth of his hands on her hips when he placed them there.

"My words wouldn't exist without you," he admitted.

"Well then I guess you're stuck with me then," Rory kissed him sweetly.

"Well, yeah, I'll keep you around for a while yet. I mean, I've got a book to finish. There's still a few chapters missing before I can find a place for this." Jess held the receipt up for emphasis.

"In that case I'll just have to hope this one is longer than the last," Rory kissed him again.

Jess led her into the kitchen and pointed to the bags of food on the table. "How about you eat while I grab a few things for our little road trip. Annie told me you've got a function to attend at 6 so I figure if we get on the road within the next hour you'll have a bit of time at the other end to nap and get yourself ready."

"Hey Jess? Thank you for coming to get me last night. Thank you for looking after me."

"As if I have a choice Rory," Jess's tone was gentle and she looked away at the raw emotion in his eyes.

"Bukowski was wrong, I don't feel like laughing at all," Rory's voice came out just above a whisper and she looked up in surprise when she heard Jess doing exactly that - laughing.

"You will soon enough, trust me," Jess assured her.

 ** _A/N I get to a point where I really want to switch views which can lead to unbalanced chapter lengths. This one was pretty short but I think I made up for it in the next one so I'll update them both together so I get my POV change and you can keep reading. :)_**

 ** _Also, Rory references the same Bukowski quote from last chapter because these two great minds obviously think alike in a literary sense._**

 ** _Lastly, the words in italics from Jess's notebook are my own pretending to be him._**


	21. Chapter 21

As they crossed over the border leaving Pennsylvania behind them, Jess turned to Rory to ask her the question that had been troubling him since 2am.

"Why did you do it Rory? It's so not you. Why did you get drunk like that?" he returned his eyes to the road and waiting for her to respond.

"I didn't want to face saying goodbye," she looked at him as she spoke and he turned his head to briefly meet her eyes before shifting his attention back to the road.

"Remember how we talked about trust? I'm about to drop you off in another big city and leave you there and I'm not going to see you again for months - I have to be able to trust that you are not going to go and drown yourself in tequila when things get hard because, you know what Rory? This is going to be hard, for both of us. I need to know that you're going to take care of yourself when I'm not around to take care of you because I need you to come back to me. Preferably in one piece and with a functioning liver."

Jess looked over to see that Rory was nodding at his words and silent tears were streaming down her face.

"I once got on a bus and went all the way across this country to avoid the difficult conversation I knew we'd have to have if I stayed. _I_ didn't want to face saying goodbye. If Jimmy hadn't kicked my ass the first time he found me passed out drunk in the yard I likely would have written myself of every single day just to get the memory of your face out of my head. I've been thankful everyday since that he did because it woke me up to myself. I had to be a better person than that. No amount of alcohol was going to wash you away. It didn't make things easier it just delayed the feelings for a while. I figured I needed to try a different approach. I needed to find a way to make myself worthy of you so I could stop running away from you and start working my way back to you instead. You can't wash me away either Rory. Call it fate, destiny, serendipity, or just chalk it up to happenstance, we keep finding our way back to each other. I'm not going to let you off the hook and just let you go this time Rory simply because you're scared of saying goodbye. I'm scared too but I also have hope that things really are different for us this time. I love you Rory. I'm determined to make this work. The alternative is inconceivable to me. If these last few days together are a genuine indication of your feelings for me then I can't imagine the alternative appeals to you either."

They drove on in silence, Jess had said all he needed to say, it was her turn to talk now. He allowed her time to process his words. They were almost in the heart of the city when she finally spoke.

"I really should start wearing a wire when I'm around you, no one would ever believe me if I told them you could talk so much and so eloquently and so many syllables all at once. Oh and that you're a complete and utter sap," Rory rambled and he smiled because that was usually a good sign.

"I think we need to lay out some ground rules to keep us both free from worry between now and November." Jess chuckled as he heard her rummaging in her bag, no doubt in search of pen and paper to write said rule list.

1\. No tequila.

2\. Ask don't assume.

3\. Always return calls and messages (at a convenient time).

4\. No flirting, kissing or any other physical contact etc with members of the opposite sex. (Or of the same sex).

Jess raised his eyebrows at her as she recited that one.

"Hey, don't think I haven't noticed the way people look at you while you're sitting all broody and oblivious sipping your coffee or walking down the street. The lady that took our photo the other day? I was surprised she didn't ask me to print her a copy so she could photoshop herself into your arms and don't even get me started on the arguably handsome hipster we bought coffee from around the corner from your place yesterday."

"You mean Will?!" He laughed incredulously. "He was not flirting with me."

"He totally was," Rory began to laugh too. "He did have very pretty eyes, you don't often see eyes that shade of green."

"Well luckily for you I prefer blue ones," Jess smiled over at her, holding her eyes for as many seconds as he dared before returning them to the road.

Jess parked the car near Rory's hotel and took the list from her hands and added another rule.

5\. Never forget how much I love you.

"Let's finish this later," he suggested as he closed the notebook and passed it back to her.

"Later," she agreed.

Jess stayed in Rory's hotel room while she went out to her work function. He pulled out his own notebook and found his pen and picked up the thread he'd been unable to find the night before and began to write. He was still in the same position when Rory returned.

"Hey," he looked up as she entered the room, locking the door behind her. "You weren't gone long."

"Only four hours I guess but it felt longer to me." Rory admitted.

"Four hours? No, it's barely..." Jess looked at his clock only to confirm that it was after 10pm. He'd been sat there writing solidly for four hours.

"I'm guessing you didn't miss me much then?" Rory teased.

"It's just, when I start writing I get into this zone and time gets away without me noticing," he tried to explain.

"I understand Jess, it's like that for me too," Rory assured him. "Do you think you might be ready to come back to reality for a little while?"

"Are you really asking if I'd rather spend the night writing or ravishing you?"

"Something like that," Rory blushed.

Jess closed his notebook loudly and let it drop to the floor as he stood and crossed the room to take her into his arms and kiss her passionately.

"That convincing enough for you?" he asked her.

"Almost," she replied before letting out a sound somewhere between a giggle and a groan as his lips found her neck in an attempt to further persuade her.

The next morning Jess was up and showered early. Rory had a full day on her schedule and Jess wanted to leave on a good note rather than try and drag out their last bit of time together. He was due back at work tomorrow anyway and had a few things he needed to get done in the meantime. He'd put his life on hold for days for this woman and he wouldn't hesitate to do it all over again but it was time he hauled himself back to reality and let her get back to hers.

Rory was still asleep when he returned with coffee and muffins for breakfast. Jess pulled out his phone and dialled the number of the room. Rory answered it on the fifth ring.

"This is your wake up call Miss Gilmore."

"Jess? Is that you?" Rory opened her eyes and looked around in confusion, finally spotting him standing by the door, phone to his ear.

"I bought breakfast," he told her as he disconnected the call and walked over to sit on the side of the bed, passing her the coffee.

"Hmmm, thank you Jess. You really do make an exceptional P.A."

Jess leaned over and planted a sweet kiss on her forehead.

"Rory? I know you've got a full day today and I'm going to leave you to it and head back to Philly soon okay?" Jess anticipated the tears that began to fall from her eyes and he kissed the trails they left on her cheeks. "Hey, please don't cry Rory. We both knew this was going to happen. We even got one night more than we'd originally planned. This is just the beginning remember?"

Rory sniffled loudly and wiped the tears away with the back of her hand.

"I got something for you, don't want you getting bored on the bus," he shrugged shyly as he passed the paper bag to her. "I bought it yesterday but I never got around to wrapping it."

Rory opened the bag and pulled out a book of poems by E.E. Cummings. She turned the pages to find the title page and the inscription she knew he would have put there.

 _You're carrying mine now, please be gentle with it._

 _I promise to be gentle with yours._

 _J xx_

Rory couldn't help the fresh torrent of tears that spilled from her eyes as she read his words a second time. Looking up to meet his she saw tears there too.

"Thanksgiving's not so far away." she lied to them both.

"It'll be here before we know it," he continued the charade.

"Call me?"

"You know I will."

"I love you Jess, so much."

"I love you Rory."

He held her in his arms until he didn't think he'd be able to control his emotions any longer.

"I've gotta go now Rory, time I was getting back on the road."

"I know," Rory agreed but she tightened her grip as her body struggled with her brain.

"We never were good at goodbyes," Jess attempted to lighten the mood.

"It's different Jess. Neither of us is running away this time." Rory squeezed him tightly one last time then let him go, her arms dropping to her side, suddenly rendered purposeless.

Jess left her there, wrapped in cotton sheets, hair still rumpled from sleep, coffee cup in one hand, a book of love in her lap. That was exactly how he wanted to remember her from now until November.

 ** _A/N now for the hard part._**

 ** _Thanks to everyone who is still with me. Hard to believe I only started this 10 days ago! I wonder what the next 10 will bring. Thanks for reading and following and favouriting and thanks especially to those who take the time to review. I hate to sound repetitive (and redundant) but it really does mean a lot to me and is incredibly encouraging to me as a novice writer. Happy Monday to you all :) x_**


	22. Chapter 22

Rory had to applaud Jess for his quick getaway plan. He'd woken her with only just enough time to eat shower and leave. No time at all to dwell or wallow. She finished off her coffee and muffin and proceeded to prepare herself for the day ahead. She ran into Annie in the lobby and they made their way out to the bus together.

"Glad to see you made it Rory," Annie smiled a curious smile as if she hadn't quite believed Rory would show up.

"Jess drove me," Rory offered in explanation but she didn't think Annie's look had anything to do with her missing the bus.

"What you said the other night...?" Annie prompted her.

"My memory is a little vague and I'm sure I said a lot of things that night, you might have to be a bit more specific," Rory was now intrigued and just a little bit worried. What exactly had she said that night?

"I just wasn't sure if you'd stick this gig out. It may have just been the tequila talking but you sounded pretty set on quitting the campaign trail and trying to find a job in Philly so you didn't have to leave Jess," Annie told her. Her tone was matter of fact and free of judgement. Rory was silent for a few minutes while she considered what her new friend had told her.

"Well, I'm here now so I guess that is what I chose, right?"

"I can't tell you if you made the right choice Rory, only you can know that. I will tell you something though - I can see why it would be hard to leave him behind, and not just because he's gorgeous either, but because he is so obviously besotted with you. For what it's worth, especially considering I don't really know either of you at all, you have a tangible connection. He's going to wait as long as he has to for you Rory. You need to think about this job and if it's what you want to spend the next year of your life doing or come up with a plan B." Rory appreciated Annie's honesty and had to credit her for giving good advice. She did need to try and judge the suitability of this job without letting her feelings for Jess cloud her perspective. If she had a different job offer would she have chosen differently? It was impossible to know because there hadn't been any other offers, she'd not had a single bite from the 74 resumes she'd sent out. This was the best, the only job, she could get and it was a fantastic opportunity for someone starting out but it just didn't feel right. She needed to figure out why that was. As the bus arrived at their venue for the day's convention she pushed all thoughts of Jess out of her mind and focused on giving her job her full attention for the first time since she'd boarded the plane to Iowa.

It was almost 10pm when her phone chimed with a new text message. She'd finished her article and sent it off to Hugo 2 hours earlier and had been laying on the bed in her hotel room alternating between reading E.E. Cummings beautiful words and thinking about Jess before shifting her focus to assessing how she truly felt about this job. She had ruled the lines for a pro con list but was yet to fill in either column but the page had stared up at her in the glare of the bedside lamp making it impossible to think straight and so she'd flung the entire notebook across the room. She could see it now, pages askew, half propped up by the corner of the armchair. She was still staring at it when the message arrived.

Jess: you still up?

Rory: yes.

Jess: talk or text?

Rory: talk?

A second later her phone began to ring.

Rory: hey, I'm guessing you made it home safely?

Jess: I would've called earlier but I knew you'd have your phone on silent and then I got caught up writing and I've only just surfaced.

It felt so good to hear his voice.

Rory: I understand. We're both here now, that's all that matters. How's the book coming along?

Jess: good, really good. I think it's pretty close to being done. How's your day been?

Rory: oh, you know, listened to a couple of politicians telling the same stories I heard last week and the week before and the week before that.

Jess: hey Rory? Is everything okay?

Rory: yeah, just tired I guess. I wish you were here, or I was there.

Jess: I know. I miss you too Rory. It'll get easier.

Rory: how can you be so sure?

Jess: I can't. It just seemed like the kind of thing people would say in this situation.

Rory: since when do you copy what other people would say or do?

The words felt bitter in her mouth long after she'd said them.

Jess: I guess since I don't have the right words to say.

She could hear the hurt in his voice but she carried on regardless.

Rory: there are no right or wrong words, only true ones. I'd rather you said nothing at all than attempt to soothe me with borrowed platitudes.

She was taken aback by the harsh tone that had come from her own lips. What was wrong with her? He was just trying his best and she was being awful to him.

Jess: Rory? What's wrong? Why are you trying to pick a fight with me?

Rory remained silent, too afraid the dam would break if she opened her mouth to speak.

Jess: You want true words? Here's a few - I don't know what to say because this is new for me. I could tell you I miss you and I want you to come back but that isn't fair to you because I know you need to do this for yourself and I'm determined to support you in that. I won't let you pick a fight with me just because you're tired and lonely. I'm going to let you get some sleep and we'll talk again tomorrow. Remember the rules we wrote? Don't break number 5.

Rory allowed the tears to fall after he'd disconnected the call. Her face was streaked and her pillow soaked but strangely enough she felt a bit better. The headache that had been building all day had disappeared and she felt refreshed. She got up from the bed and found the notebook she'd written the rules in on the trip from Philadelphia. She quickly found the right page and saw there was a fifth rule after all. She smiled through a fresh batch of tears and quickly sent Jess a text.

Rory: I'm sorry Jess. I love you xx

One day down only 150 odd to go.


	23. Chapter 23

_July_

"Hey Jess, did you get that draft typed yet?" Matt's voice broke through his thoughts and he held up a hand to silence him for a moment while he finished the sentence he was on.

"I told you I was working on it! It's not going to happen any quicker with you coming up here to check on me every few minutes!"

"What are you working on there anyway?" Matt tried to peer over his shoulder but Jess quickly slammed the notebook shut.

"Just adding an epilogue," he explained.

"An epilogue? You mean people are going to actually know how this one ends and not be left staring at the last page thinking what the?!" Matt was understandably surprised. For every person who loved The Subsect there seemed to be two who wanted to know how it ended, as if every journey in life concluded with a nice tidy ribbon tied around it.

"Yes Matt, this one's getting an ending but unless you clear out and leave me to it I won't get it done before next spring." Jess huffed at him, impatient to get back to the thought he was in the middle of when Matt had intruded on his trance.

"Okay, leaving you to it. I tell you what man, you're lucky we know how good that book's gonna be when we get our hands on it, I'm sure reputable publishing company would've struck you off by now with an attitude like yours," Matt had two hands raised in surrender as he retreated out the bedroom door.

"Is that supposed to encourage me Matt?!" Jess practically snarled this time, more to make him leave than because he felt any malice towards his friend and co worker. Matt was a good guy, supportive. He just didn't always know when to shut up and walk away. He was right though, he was lucky to have him and Chris in his life and Truncheon. He'd come here with nothing more to offer than a notebook full of darkness and they'd taken him in and published the damn thing.

"I'm going. I'll be downstairs when you're ready to hand it over." Jess looked up, surprised to find Matt still standing there, he hadn't registered his words but waved him away anyway.

"I'll bring it down when I'm done," he shouted out through the doorway before returning his attention to his notebook.

The truth was it was typed up, he'd finished it the night before but the ending had been bothering him and he hadn't slept, too busy trying to fix it. When the mail came this morning and rewarded him with a new postcard to add to the pile slowly growing on the corner of his desk, he'd read her words and knew how his story must end.

 _There's a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in._

He wondered briefly if she realised Cohen's lyrics were a reflection of a Hemingway quote and made a mental note to challenge her on it later but then he'd pushed all other thoughts aside and began to write his first ever happy ending.

 ** _A/N the quote in italics is from the Leonard Cohen song "Anthem"_**

 ** _I've decided to keep the story moving along I will approach this next stage in the story month by month with glances into the significant events eventually culminating in their reunion at Thanksgiving. The chapters will continue to alternate and there may be more events in some months than others, I just have to see what happens along the way._**

 ** _thanks RoryJess for your guest review, I'm glad to know you're enjoying the story._**


	24. Chapter 24

Rory hadn't heard from Jess for a couple of days but she knew he was busy trying to get his draft ready for editing and tried her best not to miss him. She'd sent him a postcard but had otherwise kept her end of the deal and not contacted him. He'd promised to call her when he was done and she trusted he would.

So far they'd been managing to speak at least once each day and would text each other in the meantime. Rory sent him his second postcard from New York and had sent him a new one from each new city she stopped in. It had been the longest 17 days of her life but she tried her best not to dwell on what she couldn't have and focus on the places she would have marked off on her map between now and November. She might not be an overseas correspondent but she was technically a travelling reporter which was close enough, right? That's what she kept trying to tell herself anyway - the part of her that still after over 2 months on the road wanted to run home to Stars Hollow to her mom or hop a flight to Philadelphia to her boyfriend.

The following day a message came through on her phone. She felt it vibrating in her pocket but was in the middle of observing an interview and quickly pushed the desire to check if it was from him to the back of her mind while she focused on the job at hand. When she finally read his words an hour later she didn't even bother to reply but rather hit the call button instead. He answered on the second ring and it was so good to hear his voice after so many days without it she was suddenly lost for words.

Jess: Rory? Are you still there?

Rory: I'm here. I've missed your voice.

Jess: just my voice huh?

Rory: amongst other things.

Jess: I miss you too Rory.

Rory: I got your message and you're so wrong. The quote is from a Leonard Cohen song, Anthem.

Jess: I didn't say it wasn't.

Rory: well what exactly were you trying to say?

Jess: we wouldn't even be having this conversation if you'd taken my advice and accepted Ernest into your life.

Rory: so this is a he said it first kind of argument? Oh wow, now there's a literary can of words I didn't intend to open with you. How about we just agree that Leonard said it better and leave it at that?

Jess: sure or we could just agree that the original is always the best.

Rory: should we bring M.J. Hyland into this also because you know, she borrowed that line too?

Jess: That's a great book.

Rory: of course you think that - former Holden Caulfield wannabe - Lou was basically you only her small town was a little bigger and she had her own room.

Jess: I'm not so sure that's a compliment but I'll take it anyway and my former argument still stands - Hemingway said it first so he deserves the credit.

Rory: so I take it you finished typing your draft?

Jess: smart enough to know when you're defeated?

Rory: no, just didn't want to waste anymore of our phone time trying to convince you of your ignorance.

Jess: you'll be trying to have me admit to liking Britney Spears next. Never going to happen.

Rory: not even in her plaid skirt?

Jess: now that takes me back...

Rory: I've still got mine at home, back in Stars Hollow.

Jess: is that so...?

Jess's voice sent a shiver down her spine and Rory could feel the heat rising in her cheeks. Oh that man could be so charming yet infuriating.

Rory: Jess! I am in a public place! Now, you didn't answer my question.

Jess: okay, I'll behave, for now. Yes, I finished my draft. I would've been done yesterday but it didn't seem finished to me but I've added an epilogue and now I'm happy it's done, well as happy as I'll ever be that it's done. Time to hand it over to Matt and see how much he hates it.

Rory: don't you dare say that! It's going to be great. I just know it. Just like I knew The Subsect was going to be a brilliant reflection of your amazing mind, I know that this one will be too.

Jess: do you have some Pom poms buried away with that plaid skirt?

She knew he was teasing her to avoid accepting her praise and she chose to ignore it.

Rory: I'm proud of you Jess. I can't wait to read "The Light and the Dark". Maybe I can convince Hugo to put a review up on the site?

Jess: just wait until you read it first Rory.

Rory: okay. Hey, I'm going to have to go now Jess or I'll have to find my own way back to the hotel.

Jess: sure, I'll let you go.

Rory: talk again soon?

Jess: I'll be back on wakeup duty tomorrow, what time do you need to be up?

Rory: really? I mean don't get me wrong, I love waking up to your voice everyday but I kinda thought you'd get sick of it after the first week.

Jess: it's the best 5 minutes of my day.

Rory: I love you Jess.

Jess: I love you too Rory.

Rory: 8am

Jess: talk to you then.

As soon as Rory was back in her hotel room she switched her laptop on and waited for the Internet to connect. She would never admit it to him but she had a niggling feeling that he was in fact right about the quote. Seemed it was a common misconception but alas, it was Hemingway. Damn him and his brilliant mind she cursed aloud in the empty room but she couldn't keep the smile from her face all the same, that brilliant mind was something she could never resent, it was his most beautiful asset.


	25. Chapter 25

_August_

Jess's pile of postcards from Rory had been moved to a box he now kept on his bedside table. He still smiled every time a new one arrived and would try and pick the quote from the picture before flipping the card over to reveal her choice. Sometimes he was right but he liked it better when he wasn't, the surprise seemed all the sweeter for the challenge.

The final edit of his book was complete and Chris was getting ready to start their first print run by the end of the month. It was going to be 500 copies to start with again, same as it had been with The Subsect. They had a few more contacts this time around and Hugo had agreed to publish Rory's review on his site and there were several other interviews scheduled for the first few weeks of the release. There was still a decision to be made about author distributing again as he had before but they were waiting to see what kind of buzz the book got on its own first. Matt and Chris had talked him into agreeing to a launch party and had begun posting flyers - virtual and paper - everywhere they could. He wanted to ask Rory to come but didn't want to face the disappointment of her not being able to make it. He had her schedule and he couldn't see any feasible way she would be able to so he decided not to tell her about it at all. It wasn't that big of a deal anyway.

It was too early to call her yet, she wasn't due for her wake up call until 9am today, so Jess lay back on the bed, his head propped up on two pillows, and lifted the box of cards from the table. He placed it beside him on the bed, removing the lid then picking a random picture from the pile. Boston. He hadn't needed to guess who Rory would quote with this one, his name was in yellow block letters on a vivid red background - he could practically see her smiling with glee at the discovery of this tacky gem. He remembered the quote without having to turn the card over but he turned it over anyway, hearing her voice as he read her neat handwriting.

 _Being alone never felt right, sometimes it felt good but it never felt right._

She had been trying to let him know she was okay. She was missing him but she was okay.

Jess checked the time again, still too early but he didn't want to wait any longer. They'd both been so busy over the last couple of weeks the calls were getting shorter and he was feeling the distance more acutely each time she hung up. It was different for her, she was constantly moving, seeing new things, meeting new people. She'd even scored a few interviews with the big man himself which would be an asset to any new journalist's portfolio. He was stuck in this one place, alone in his apartment, reliving 4 days worth of memories of her presence here. It wasn't enough. Was anything short of everything ever going to be enough? _Find what you love and let it kill you,_ wise advice Charles, thanks for that. He pushed the box aside with more force than he'd intended, frustration suddenly getting the better of him. He got up and returned the now empty box to the bedside table and began to pick up the scattered postcards from the floor. Once they were all back safely in the box, lid on, he felt calm again. Just as he was about to reach for his phone to call Rory it rang.

He smiled as he settled back onto the bed, answering on the fifth ring.

Jess: hey, I thought this was my job?

Rory: I've been laying here awake willing you to ring early but you didn't so I decided to call you instead. I didn't wake you did I?

Jess: no, I've been up a while.

Rory: so we've got a bit of extra time then?

Jess: well I've got all day so that's up to you.

Rory: can you do that thing you did the other night when we talked?

Jess: what exactly are you referring to Rory?

He knew what she wanted him to do but liked to imagine her squirming.

Rory: you know what I'm talking about. I don't want to ask you because then you'll feel obligated to agree and I want it to be of your own freewill.

Jess: my own freewill huh? But surely you're just cajoling me into the illusion that it was such a choice?

Rory: nice paraphrasing there, Melville would be impressed.

Jess: are you going to ask me then or are we going to waste more time playing this game?

Rory: okay, I'll ask you. Just promise me one thing?

Jess: depends on the promise.

Rory: if you really don't want to, you'll say no?

Jess: I can't imagine a time when I wouldn't want to but yes, in the event that I don't feel up to it, I'll say no. Deal?

Rory: deal.

Jess waited for her to ask him her question, he was already prepared and was reaching into his bedside drawer when she finally voiced her simple request.

Rory: Jess, would you please read me some more of your story?

He bit his bottom lip to keep a chuckle from escaping. As if he could ever say no to her. Bukowski invaded his thoughts again: _I began to feel like a kept man and it felt great._

Jess: I thought you'd never ask.

He removed his notebook from the drawer and opened it to where they'd left off the last time and began to read his words to her.

 _ **A/N quotes in italics are borrowed from Charles Bukowski.**_


	26. Chapter 26

The moment Rory hated the most was when she had to press the button to end the call, disconnecting her from Jess. She knew it had to be her. He always left it up to her. Maybe he was trying to atone for all the times he'd walked away before she was finished. Maybe he just hated that moment as much as she did.

She lay back against her pillows knowing she really should have been in the shower already but unable to make herself move from the bed. She hadn't doubted they would be, but his words, his new book, were somehow even better than his first. He'd matured as a person in the time that had passed in between and it was reflected in his writing. She wondered for a brief moment what her writing said about her? Hugo had been sending her drafts back with notes lately where before he'd just made minor adjustments for her now he wanted her to rework her view. Her standards were slipping. She needed to step it up or she might not even get to choose whether the trail was for her or not if she lost her spot in the meantime.

Hugo had been great really. The criticism stung but she knew from her own experience as editor of the Yale Daily News that it was meant constructively and was also essential to producing a quality publication that everyone involved could be proud of. She'd been a little surprised when Hugo had accepted her proposal for and subsequent review of The Light and The Dark and there had been no notes sent back to rework it only one brief comment: _Terrific job, this is where I need all your articles to be at._ The only trouble with that was politics and literature were apples and oranges, or maybe salad and pancakes was a better analogy. She had to channel the 16 year old version of herself who'd once written an incredibly insightful article about paving and remember that every seemingly boring story had an interesting angle just waiting to be discovered.

Rory had wasted away all her getting ready time and had to settle for pulling her hair back in a ponytail and washing her face in lieu of a shower. She dressed quickly in the clothes she'd laid out the night before, grabbed her bag and headed for the bus.

She still sat up front on the bus and some days Annie sat with her but today she was back in the middle and Rory was happy in her solitude. She sent Jess a message, despite having already spoken to him this morning. He was the only person she felt like sharing her thoughts with today.

Rory: what do politics and literature have in common?

Rory stared out the window as she waited for him to respond.

Jess: is this some kind of test?

Rory smiled when she read his words.

Rory: no, just thinking and I wanted a second opinion.

Jess: well, I guess they don't have much in common as such but they each have a great influence over the other?

Rory thought this over and decided he was absolutely right. She had an idea for how to make her next article more compelling and complex, less bland and superficial.

Rory: have I ever told you I love your mind?

Jess: I take it you agree with my opinion?

Rory: I'm feeling freshly inspired. Hopefully no more late night rewrites.

Jess: well, in that case I'm definitely glad my mind could be of service to you.

Rory but her lip and could feel her cheeks getting hot as she dared to type out her next message.

Rory: maybe if we're both free tonight we can enjoy a quiet night in together.

Jess: so I can read you more of my book?

Oh, he was such a smart ass! Such a loveable one though.

Rory: amongst other things...

Jess: call me when you're ready.

Rory fought the urge to call him right then and there, reminding herself she was on a bus full of fellow reporters on their way to work.

Rory: later xx

Jess: x

Rory tried her best to push thoughts of _later_ out of her mind and began to jot down a few ideas she might be able to incorporate into today's coverage. She paused mid thought and dug around in her bag to find the book she'd been carrying around since the first day on this journey. Opening it she read began to reread Jess's margin notes. Somewhere between the covers of The Fountainhead she felt certain she'd find a new angle for her writing.

At the end of the day Rory turned down Annie's offer to get dinner together and instead grabbed a takeaway pizza and headed straight up to her room. She'd made a start on her article during her lunch break and again on the bus back to the hotel and was keen to get it finished. It didn't seem like such a chore today and she knew that was a good sign. She sent off her first draft, finished the last slice of pizza and then got into the shower. It felt so good to wash the day away and she felt refreshed and ready to call Jess. She checked her emails one last time and squealed when she saw Hugo's quick response to her story: _Glad to see you've found your voice again Rory._

It felt good to have it back.

Rory dialled Jess's number and sank back against the pillows feeling lighter than she had in weeks.


	27. Chapter 27

_September_

It was too late now. Jess knew in his gut he'd made the wrong decision but he couldn't change that now. The book launch was tomorrow night and, even if he told Rory today, there was no possible way she'd be able to make it. He didn't tell her in the first place because he didn't want her to feel obligated to drop everything for him. Her schedule was crazy this month as the campaign made its way across the central states and she'd have had to take time out from the trail to come. She seemed to be finally finding her stride and he didn't want to disturb that.

A secondary part of his reasoning to not tell her was self preservation. He knew once she left him again he'd be back at square one in the game of learning to cope with missing her and as much as he ached to see her, a few measly hours in a room full of people all wanting his attention wasn't his ideal scenario for a satisfying reunion. If she was here he'd want to lock them both away in his apartment until she needed to leave again and he didn't think that met Matt and Chris's expectation of his involvement in this party. It was too late now anyway. He just wished he didn't have to lie to her.

Matt and Chris had already left half an hour ago and it was now past closing time. Jess locked up the front door to the store, turned the sign over to keep latecomers from knocking and shut off the lights then he headed out the back to the storeroom. He sat down on a stool and opened one of the boxes waiting to be unpacked to fill the display racks tomorrow. It was still hard for him to think of himself as a published author. He was pretty sure no one in his life had ever thought he'd amount to anything. Well, almost no one. Luke and Rory had believed in him, even before he'd ever given them any reason to, they'd seen something in him that no one else had ever bothered to notice before. Something he'd never allowed himself to see, until they'd given him a reason to want to. It had been easy for him to recognise he'd done this for them. It had taken him a good deal longer to realise he'd done it for himself too.

He turned the fresh copy of his new book over in his hands, running his fingers over the lettering. By Jess Mariano. _You wrote a book? You sat down and wrote a book!_ Suddenly he was back in that ridiculous room, in that overindulgent house with a Rory who wasn't his Rory but some bizarre vapid version of herself. Things had been so awkward between them that night and not just because they couldn't speak above a whisper. He'd come to her with his proof, tangible evidence of his worthiness: 114 pages of hope for a future with her. Then he'd stood by to watch it get crushed under the wheels of her boyfriend's Porsche.

Jess got up from the stool, returned the book to the box and closed the lid. He turned off the light and shut the storeroom door them made his way in the dark to the stairs up to his apartment. He didn't bother to switch any lights on as he walked past the kitchen and into the lounge. There was still just enough light left in the day to cast the room in a soft glow. Rory would be finished for the day and ready to call soon so he sat on the couch to wait. He didn't even bother to attempt to read, he knew he'd be unable to focus. Two more phone calls to get through and then he wouldn't have to hide anything from her. He'd be glad to have the stupid party behind him. It all seemed like more trouble than it was worth.

The sun had long since disappeared for another day and the room was now completely dark but Jess hadn't moved from his spot in the lounge. He should probably have made himself some dinner but he wasn't hungry. He could have switched on the TV but he knew there was nothing but rubbish on so didn't bother. He briefly wondered what was keeping her but then shook his head at himself, get a life Mariano! Since when do you sit around waiting for the phone to ring?! He checked the time and saw it was after 11pm. He threw his phone across the room in frustration and went to bed.

The first thing he registered the next morning as he began to wake up was the sun was shining in around the edges of his curtains. The second thing he noticed was his phone ringing. He reached for the rectangular device on his bedside table where he usually kept it but it wasn't there. He sat up in the bed and looked across the room to his desk but it wasn't there either. The ringing stopped and he lay back against the pillows and let out a heavy sigh. Less than a minute later the phone rang again. Jess checked his watch to discover it was almost 10. He'd slept for 11 hours?! He couldn't remember the last time he'd slept so long and he felt groggy with it. Who knew too much sleep could make you feel as bad as not enough? He followed the ringing and located his phone on the floor at the base of his bookcase.

Jess: hello?

Rory: hey, is everything okay?

Apparently this was the day for lying.

Jess: yeah, sure.

No, you didn't call and I sat up half the night waiting for you to like some lovesick moron.

Rory: you didn't call...I thought...

He couldn't hide the irritability from his voice.

Jess: I guess we're even then.

Rory: Jess?

She sounded so small and far away and he immediately regretted his tone.

Jess: look, I woke up in a bad mood and I've got a big day ahead of me which I'm already running late for. How about I call you later when I'm less likely to be a jerk to you?

Rory: okay. You're sure that's all it is? There's nothing else bothering you?

Jess: I'm sure.

Rory: well I guess I have to take your word for it.

Jess: I guess you do.

There's an uncharacteristically uncomfortable silence on both ends of the line for several minutes finally broken by Rory.

Rory: hey Jess?

Jess: yes Rory?

Rory: don't forget our fifth rule.

Jess: I'll try not

Rory: I'll call you tonight okay?

If you can find the time to remember.

Jess: I've really got to go.

Rory: okay, bye Jess. I love you.

Jess: bye.

Jess disconnected the call before she could say anymore and walked into the kitchen to get a bottle of water from the fridge. He left the phone on the kitchen table and went to take a shower, hoping the hot water would wash away his bad mood. He hadn't lied to her about that part - he did have a big day ahead of him helping Matt and Chris get Truncheon ready for the party and he was definitely late.

Ten minutes later, showered and dressed and seemingly somewhat less inhospitable, Jess made his way down the stairs to find his colleagues arguing over how to rearrange the furniture.

"Hey guys? Why don't you just set it up the same as last time?" Jess interrupted them.

"Well, look who finally decided to join us and help. Just because you wrote the book doesn't mean you get out of the grunt work," Matt chided him.

"Hey, it's not like I even wanted to throw this stupid party in the first place!" Jess snapped back. Clearly the shower had not fixed his attitude.

"Hey man, I know you're bummed Rory can't make it but we did offer to try for another night," Chris was too insightful for his own damn good.

"This isn't about her!" Jess insisted but even he was unconvinced by his tone.

"Whatever you say man," Chris held up his hands as a sign of surrender. Both these guys knew him too well and they knew when to push him and when to back away.

"So, refresh my memory, where did we have these chairs last time?" Matt prompted them all back to the issue at hand and Jess happily lost himself in the mindless task of moving furniture.

The day flew by and before he'd even had a chance to get nervous about having to get up and speak in front of a bunch of strangers, Matt was practically pushing him towards the stairs up to his apartment.

"Go, shower, change, guests will be arriving in twenty minutes and I don't think the sweaty, dusty look is going to sell as many books as the freshly washed and gelled one will." Jess just looked at Matt, tempted to make a retort about coming back done in his towel but thought better of it. These two guys had busted their guy all day for this launch. For him. He nodded to them both and made for the stairs without further argument.

"See you in twenty," he called over his shoulder.

"Your public will be waiting," Chris responded with a smile.

Jess could feel himself relaxing for the first time that day and a smile appeared on his own face as he reached his door.

32 minutes later, Jess made his way back down the stairs to find the place looking much the same as it had when he'd left it except now it was crammed to the brim with more people than he could ever have anticipated coming. Were they really all here for him? For his book? He felt a pang of regret that Rory wasn't here to see this. He would have loved to have her by his side right now, to walk the room with him, to meet and greet with him and calm him with a touch of her hand. He should've just asked her. It was too late now.

 ** _A/N I know I usually post both views together but today was my birthday and I spent my day off being spoilt by my lovely husband and son and haven't completed Rory's view yet. I'll get it up sometime tomorrow I promise and there may be a second September chapter from Jess to go with it too._**

 ** _Thank you_** ** _Jesse_** ** _for your guest review, it really made me smile :)_**


	28. Chapter 28

Her conversation with Jess and been bugging her all day. She felt like she must've done something wrong but couldn't for the life of her think what it could be. Everything had been fine when they'd spoken the morning before. Well, maybe not fine if she was honest, they'd both been so busy lately and they'd been slightly less connected but she put that down to them being tired and preoccupied. Rule number two: ask don't assume. As soon as she was done with today's write up she would call him and ask as many questions it took until she found the right one and got to the bottom of this weird fight they seemed to be in.

She was surprised and then concerned when she heard Chris's voice on the other end of the phone when she finally got around to calling Jess.

Rory: Chris? Where's Jess? Is he okay?

Chris: hey Rory, yeah, all's good, Jess is fine. He's downstairs at his party. I just came up to grab a few CDs to supplement Matt's abysmal taste.

Rory: party? Jess is having a party.

Chris: technically it's his book launch. Hey, I thought you knew about it? Jess told us you couldn't make it.

Rory: first I'm hearing of it. Guess someone's been falling back into old habits.

Rory could hear the bitterness in her tone and tried to shake it off. There had to be some logical explanation to this right? Why wouldn't he want her to be there? Was this because of what happened last time? Had she ruined his night so badly he didn't want her to share this one with him? She thought they'd moved on. Suddenly the coldness and distance she'd been putting down to busyness all week began to make sense and it chilled her to the bone. So we're back to this are we Jess? Back to lying when things get uncomfortable? Well, she wasn't going to let him get away with it this time.

Chris: hey Rory? Are you still there?

Rory: sorry Chris, yes, I'm still here.

Chris: did you want me to see if I can drag Jess away for a bit?

Rory: no, don't bother him. Actually can you do me a favour?

Chris: sure.

Rory: don't tell him I called.

Chris: no worries. Have a good one Rory. Hope we'll be seeing you again real soon. Jess has been a previously unchartered level of moody since you left.

Rory: thanks Chris. Enjoy the launch. I hope the book is a big success for you all.

Chris: I have a good feeling about this one. I reckon we'll be printing a second run within the month.

Rory: bye Chris.

Chris: see ya round Rory.

Rory listened to the dial tone until it dropped away into nothingness. She stared blankly at her phone, at least a dozen thoughts running through her mind attempting to process Chris's words.

Jess's book was released.

They were hosting a launch party.

That party was tonight.

Jess hadn't told her.

Jess had told Chris that she couldn't come.

Jess had lied to them both.

Jess didn't want her to know.

Jess didn't want her there.

Jess lied.

He lied.

It wasn't even like he'd broken one of their rules. She hadn't thought "no lies" needed to be articulated in their silly contract. She broken the second rule by assuming. Clearly she'd been mistaken.

Rory was unable to sleep, torn between anger and disappointment, she tossed and turned until dawn then gave up and got herself ready for the day ahead of her. She was way too early for the bus so she decided to find somewhere to have breakfast to pass the time. She found a sweet little cafe a few blocks from the hotel and had her pick of the tables thanks to the early hour. She chose a high backed armchair by a low table in the back corner and made herself comfortable. She ordered coffee and a danish and sat back in her seat, letting out a weary sigh while she waited for them to be brought over to her.

The coffee was good. Not Luke's good but as close as she'd found so far in the last 4 months. 4 months? 4 months! Wow, had it really been that long already? Had it _only_ been that long? She still had 10 months to go, longer if Obama won. She was feeling better about the job since finding her voice again but it still felt like something wasn't right. Not Jess, she'd gotten used to missing him and had learnt to differentiate her desire to be with him from her discontent with the job. No, it wasn't Jess, it was something else. That mystery something else was what kept her sending off resumes and applications to every job she came across. She scoured the Internet for vacancies in Philly but also in New York, New Haven and Hartford. So far she'd not even received a reply with the exception of a handful of automated out of office messages. Still, she kept at it. She didn't know if she believed in signs but she had a feeling that however she reacted if and when she got offered an interview would be a true reflection of what she really wanted to do. The fact that, after 4 months, this job still didn't feel right was a sign in itself but she didn't know which direction she needed to go to fix that. Hopefully she'd figure it out soon.

Rory finished her coffee and danish and ordered a triple shot to go, she had had a sleepless night and she'd need all the assistance she could get to survive the day ahead.

She went though the motions: tape recorder on, pen and paper ready, eyes forward, mind focused, and go. She maintained her focus until lunch time but by then had such an abominable headache she could barely stand let alone stick it out any longer. Annie generously offered to share her notes with her that evening and helped her into a taxi back to the hotel. She crawled into bed fully clothed and fell into a deep sleep and didn't surface again until Annie knocked on her door shortly after 7pm.

"Hey, how're you feeling? I was worried about you." Annie's voice was genuinely concerned. "You're not getting sick are you? Or pregnant?! You're not are you?"

"No, nothing like that. I just didn't get any sleep last night and then I had too much coffee this morning," Rory explained.

"Too much coffee? I didn't think there was such a thing to you? Don't you run on the stuff?" Annie asked in bemused shock.

"It's a mystery to me too. At least my headache seems to be gone. Thanks for helping me get the cab," Rory appreciated it. Annie had become a good friend to her and understood her need to be alone at times but also helped prompt her out of her shell when the occasion called for it, although no tequila had passed either of their lips since that first night out together. Rory felt like she had a big sister on the bus and hoped Annie realised how much she valued her.

"Did you eat already?" Rory asked her.

"Not yet, I thought I'd bring you the notes and we could hang out and write together, if that's not too weird?" Annie turned slightly to show Rory her overflowing bag.

"I think it's just about weird enough to work," Rory smiled and opened the door all the way. "Come on in. Shall I order pizza?"

"Pizza sounds good." Annie agreed.

The two women spent the next few hours writing and eating and chatting. It was the most fun Rory had had in all the time she'd been on the road.

"We should do this more often," Rory suggested as she saw Annie to the door.

"I'd really like that," Annie smiled. "I miss home a little less when I hang out with you. You remind me of my sister."

"Oh really? That's sweet. I found a great little cafe if you want to get breakfast before we leave tomorrow?" Rory suggested.

"Sure, sounds good," Annie nodded. "I'll come by at 7:30?"

"It's a plan," Rory watched Annie walk down the corridor toward her room and shut the door behind her.

She hadn't realised how late it had gotten and remembered her plan to call Jess and talk to him about his lies but when she found her phone and saw the 7 missed calls and 3 messages she switched it off and went to bed. It had been a long day and she was too tired for fighting. She'd deal with it in the morning.

 ** _A/N More to come from Jess's point of view next._**


	29. Chapter 29

Jess had been so caught up at the party it wasn't until after everyone left he remembered Rory had told him she'd ring him tonight. He checked his pockets for his phone then remembered he'd left it upstairs in the kitchen that morning and hadn't actually checked it all day. He'd been such a jerk to her because she hadn't called him last night and now here he was ignoring his phone all day. He needed to fix this, he needed to apologise before this got out of hand.

Jess took the stairs two at a time and found his phone on the kitchen table. He thought it was odd as he was certain he'd left it on the counter. He checked the screen but found no message or missed call alerts there but when he unlocked the phone and the call log came up he could see Rory's name was at the top of it. She had called his phone and she'd spoken to someone for 7 minutes. Shit. Who did she talk to? Oh hell, she knew. She knew about the party. She knew he'd lied to her. Shit. He had to explain. He checked the time and, as much as it pained him to, he decided it was too late to call her now, this would have to wait until tomorrow. He slumped down onto the dining chair and rested his forehead against the cool wood of the table. He'd broken the one unwritten rule and he wasn't sure how he was going to make it up to her but he was determined he would.

Resigned to the fact there was nothing he could do about it tonight he went back downstairs to help Matt and Chris clean up. It had been a successful evening and everyone seemed to have enjoyed themselves. Chris was moving an armchair back to its usual place when he spotted Jess coming down the stairs.

"Hey man, thought you'd left us for the night," Chris greeted him.

"Just had to check something. Hey, you didn't happen to answer my phone earlier this evening?" Jess asked him, paying close attention to Chris's face as he waited for him to respond. Chris had one of those faces that read like an open book, a large print one. It made him easy to beat at poker and impossible to miss a lie.

"She told me not to tell you." He admitted apologetically.

"Did you tell her about the party?" Jess needed to know.

"I'm sorry man, I thought she already knew," Chris confirmed his fear.

"Not your fault. Maybe next time just let it ring out okay?"

"Sure man," Chris agreed. "Explain to me one thing though, why didn't you tell her? I don't get it. She would've dropped everything to be here for you, why didn't you give her the chance?"

"You answered your own question. I didn't ask her because it was too much to ask of her. She _would've_ dropped everything for me and I couldn't have her doing that. Her schedule is crazy at the moment and she had no time spare to be flying back to Philly to spend a token few hours with me while I was busy talking my book up to a bunch of strangers." Jess tried to explain his reasoning.

"I think you need to tell that to her. Soon." Chris looked at him seriously. "I know it's none of my business but I don't want to see you ruin this for yourself Jess. Don't forget I got to witness first hand the aftermath of your last launch party, specifically Rory's guest appearance and swift departure. I was wary when the postcards and fruit baskets started to arrive but then you had that week together and you were a changed man, for the better. This last week I've watched you slipping back and it doesn't suit you man."

"I'm going to call her in the morning. I will fix this." Jess spoke more to convince himself than for Chris's benefit. Chris just nodded in understanding.

"Anyone that can inspire this," Chris held up a copy of The Light and The Dark, "is worth fighting for."

Jess started collecting empty cups in a trash bag, an idea forming in his mind as he went. First things first though, he'd call her tomorrow, admit the error of his ways and hope she'd forgive them. He'd keep Plan B up his sleeve for now.

Jess couldn't tell how much sleep he'd had. He'd tossed and turned all night, finally dozing off properly before dawn. When he eventually woke he discovered he'd missed Rory's wakeup call. Damn it! Great start Mariano. He got up and showered and grabbed jeans and a shirt from the wardrobe and hastily dressed before heading down for his morning shift in the store. He'd at least remembered to pocket his phone this time before leaving the apartment and during the first lull of the morning he tried Rory's number. He didn't really expect her to answer and he hung up without leaving a message. He tried her again twice when she should've been on lunch. 3 more times around dinner and one last time before giving up and going to bed. He'd left 3 voicemails, each more desperate than the last and he wished he could go back in time and erase them.

He'd really blown it this time. He couldn't make her answer his calls but he couldn't make things right with her without her giving him the chance to explain. Plan B quickly became the only option and, as long as Matt and Chris agreed, he'd put it into action tomorrow. Right now, he needed sleep so he gave into it knowing he had a plan. He would make this right tomorrow. Failure wasn't an option here.

When Jess explained his predicament to Chris and Matt the next morning they made a decent attempt to cover their surprise at Jess making such a big gesture, but offered their support all the same. Jess knew from the copy of the schedule Rory had sent him that she'd be arriving in Houston in a few hours. Jess had managed to get a seat on a flight that would get him there that evening. Chris drove him to the airport, wishing him luck as Jess hoisted his bag onto his back about to shut the car door behind him.

"Thanks Chris," Jess told his friend. "I'll be back in a couple of days, I owe you."

"Just do what you gotta do Jess," Chris gave a quick wave through the window as Jess shut the door and walked across the road into the airport.

The flight was delayed but Jess didn't care, as long as it got him there, to Houston, to Rory, he didn't care what time he arrived. As it worked out he found himself knocking on her door at a quarter to midnight, silently praying she'd answer.

He knocked a second time and held his breath as he heard her on the other side of the door. He couldn't help but smile when he heard her curse after bumping into something in the dark. He was still smiling when she opened the door and he forgot about everything else except how much he loved her and how much he'd missed her as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her passionately.


	30. Chapter 30

Rory's body responded automatically to Jess's kiss before she'd even truly registered it was him. She broke away from his embrace and looked into his eyes before shaking her head at him and pulling him the rest of the way into her room and shutting the door behind him.

He put his bag down on the chair by the window and followed her to where she was now sitting on the edge of the bed. They stared at each other for a few minutes before Rory decided someone had to say something and it looked like it was going to have to be her.

"What are you doing here Jess? Why'd you come here?" She rubbed her eyes, trying to wake herself up properly.

"Because I needed to apologise and explain and you wouldn't answer my calls." his voice was low and earnest and she didn't have it in her to fight him.

"I meant to call you back but I got caught up with Annie yesterday and I've been busy all day today and then I fell asleep as soon as I'd eaten and then, well, now you're here." She offered up a simple explanation that also happened to be true.

"Seems we keep missing each other a lot lately," Jess pointed out.

"We both knew this was going to be hard Jess." Rory reminded him.

"Rory? I know I've got some explaining to do but now I'm here I feel suddenly so incredibly tired. I've barely slept in days and I don't want to stuff this up by muddling my words. Do you think we could just sleep and talk things over in the morning? I promise you I can explain everything. Right now I'm just so tired." She could see it in his face, it was as if he'd been running a marathon and her door had been the finishing line and now he had nothing left to offer.

"Come to bed, we'll talk in the morning." Rory pulled back the covers on one side for him then climbed back into her side. She didn't resist when he wrapped his arms around her and held her. Oh how she had missed this! They both fell quickly into a deep and peaceful sleep, safe and sound back in each other's arms at long last.

Rory's alarm woke them both the next morning and they met each other in the middle of the bed, still dazed from sleep, and let their bodies take over, giving into the urges they hadn't been able to properly satisfy in months.

"You have no idea how much I've missed that!" Jess rolled back onto his back, throwing his head back onto the pillow as he attempted to catch his breath and calm his racing heart.

"You came a hell of a long way for a booty call Jess," Rory teased him but they both knew they had some talking to do.

"What time do you have to go?" Jess asked her.

"Just give me a sec..." She could feel his eyes on her bare back as she sat on the edge of the bed and dialled Annie's number.

"Hey Annie? The infamous Gilmore gut failed me and I've been up all night with food poisoning. I've had no sleep and feel pretty rough and don't have the energy to face today." She lied.

"Oh no Rory! Do you think it was the shrimp? I told you it looked funny! Do you need me to get you anything before I head out?" Annie was genuinely concerned.

"No, I'll be okay, just need to rest and rehydrate. I didn't want you to worry when I didn't show up today. I'll call Hugo and explain, I'm sure missing one day won't matter too much right?"

"You can't help being sick. Take care of yourself and I'll see you on the bus in the morning." Annie assured her.

"Thanks Annie, I'll see you in the morning." Rory disconnected the call and turned to face Jess who was suddenly looking very serious.

"You've got one day Jess, I'm on a bus out of here tomorrow, how about we get the talking part over and done with and then we can get back to the catching up part," Rory smiled at him.

"Can I just say, this is not what I expected at all. I wasn't even sure you'd let me in the door. I lied to you Rory and I know you know I did. I'm sorry I did but I did it for you." Jess paused for a moment, his eyes searching hers for something, she just wasn't quite sure what.

"Go on," she prompted him.

"When Matt and Chris brought up the idea of a launch party the first thing I wanted to do was call you and get you booked on a flight back to Philadelphia because I knew you wouldn't miss it for anything but the more I thought about it the more I felt it was wrong to put you in that situation. I couldn't expect you to drop everything like that for me. I knew how busy your schedule was this month and I knew you wouldn't have any time to spare and would have to miss a couple of days work to come and spend a few hours with me and four dozen strangers in a cramped bookstore. For what it's worth I wished you were there every minute of the whole stupid thing. Even more than lying to you I regretted picking a fight with you because I was angry with myself. I was angry at you too because you didn't call me and I waited up half the night waiting for you to call me and I felt like a complete tool when I realised it. Mostly though I was just over it all. I've missed you so damn much Rory. The book kept me busy for a while but it's done now. What am I going to do now? How am I going to keep busy enough to keep myself from going crazy?"

"Oh Jess, I can't even be mad at you now. You do realise the irony here though don't you? You didn't want me to miss work for this big event in your life and yet here I am missing work anyway. I wish you had've told me, given me the option to choose." She told him honestly.

"I know Rory. By the time I realised what a stupid mistake I'd made it was too late to change it. If Chris hadn't answered my phone that night you would never even have known about it." The regret in his voice was clear.

"I'm glad he did though because otherwise you wouldn't be here with me right now," she pointed out.

Rory knew they still had more to figure out but she was sick of missing him and wasn't about to waste another minute of their time going in circles resolving a fight that had never even really gotten to the point of being a fight and was really just a result of good intentions poorly managed and genuine mistakes and bad timing. She leant closer to Jess and placed her lips over his waiting for him to respond. He kissed her softly and sweetly at first but then deepened the kiss, pulling her down on top of him on the bed. He broke of the kiss and pushed her gently up to sit astride him, his eyes taking her in, recommitting her to memory.

"Is it possible you're even more beautiful than I recalled?" his eyes were so dark and intense as they looked deeply into hers that they made her skin tingle.

"Is it possible you're even more of a sap than I recalled?" she teased in return.

He punished her by tickling her until she begged him to stop then he rolled her onto her back, carefully supporting his own weight above her. The serious look was back in his eyes again and she couldn't escape his gaze this time. He lowered his mouth to hers placing a fleeting kiss on her lips before trailing his tongue along her collarbone then nibbling gently at the base of her neck all the way up to her ear.

"I love you Rory," he whispered softly to her then he returned his lips to hers, swallowing her reply.

They spent the entire day in bed together, loving, talking, and laughing. When they got tired they napped and when they got hungry they ordered takeaway and had it delivered to the room. They didn't leave their cosy cave until Rory's schedule forced her to the next morning. As Jess kissed her goodbye it was as if neither of them even remembered why he'd come here in the first place. The details didn't matter. They'd missed each other and had both desperately needed to reconnect.

"Thanksgiving's not so far away," Rory told him as she kissed him goodbye. It wasn't even a lie this time.

"2 months," Jess affirmed.

"Shall I get mom to hold a room for us at the Dragonfly?" Rory dared to ask.

"As you wish," he smiled his best smile and kissed her like only he could and then he let her go.


	31. Chapter 31

_October_

True to Chris's prediction, they were currently completing a second print run of Jess's book and he couldn't quite get his head around how quickly the first 500 had left the boxes in the storeroom to be relocated in homes and stores across the country.

Jess had returned from Houston with a smile on his face that seldom left him. Matt had stopped teasing him about it now, he was growing used to it and it was good for the store too. They were busier than they'd ever been because of one little book and the growing buzz about its charismatic author. Jess scoffed when he'd read himself described that way - charismatic? Sure, if you say so. Rory's review was still his favourite and Chris had printed a copy to hang on the glass covered notice board at the front of the store. Matt had suggested they get a life size cut out of him to put outside on the footpath but Jess flatly refused. He still wasn't certain if he'd been serious or not. Matt had had some crazy ideas over the time he'd known him but that one was bordering on insane. He'd told Rory about the idea and once she'd finished giggling in glee at the thought of it she'd asked if they could make a second one for her to keep her company on the road. His own version of a withering stare was lost on her over the phone but she'd dropped the teasing quickly and switched the conversation over to Thanksgiving.

In a little over 5 weeks they would both be arriving in Hartford, Jess by car, Rory by plan. He'd pick her up from the airport and return her home to Stars Hollow. The thought of returning to the small town for once didn't bother him, he was actually looking forward to it. Things had been good between him and his uncle for a long time now and he was always supportive of him. Jess was only sorry it had taken him such a long time and a lot of regrettable mistakes for him to realise all Luke had ever tried to do was help him, even if he didn't always go about it in the most obvious way. The way he saw it, they had that in common, amongst other things.

Back in May when Jess had told Luke he was talking to Rory again, his uncle had been unable to disguise his joy at the announcement.

"I never trusted that Logan guy," he'd told Jess. "He wasn't good enough for her, even if he could cook a mean lobster. I always hoped you'd turn yourself around and find your way back to her Jess. Just don't hurt her again. Don't hurt yourself again."

Jess had thanked him and promised to try his best not to let either of them down. He'd made more promises in the last 5 months than he'd made in his entire life but he was determined to keep every single one.

Lorelai had been a different story. Rory had been upset after she'd initially told her mom she was seeing him again but refused to go into detail about their conversation and they hadn't ever broached the subject since. As he locked the door, closing Truncheon for the day, he decided he would take this matter into his own hands and call Lorelai. He didn't want to waste his precious week with Rory avoiding her mother.

He sat at the kitchen table and dialled the Gilmore house. He laughed and shook his head as he heard the answering machine message cut across the line - some things never changed. He was about to leave a message but changed his mind, hanging up instead. What would he have said anyway? This was a conversation that would take more than a few quickly chosen words.

He dialled his Uncle instead and was about to give up when he finally answered, he sounded like he'd been running.

Jess: bad time?

Luke: Jess? Is that you?

Jess: figured it was my turn to call you.

Luke: does that bring us up to the skipping part?

Jess laughed. How his uncle hadn't pushed him in the lake more than once was beyond him, he really had been such a little jerk. Hey, maybe he and Lorelai would agree on a few things after all.

Jess: I think I'll pass.

Luke: sure.

Luke sounded distracted and Jess could hear noise in the background.

Jess: are you sure this isn't a bad time?

Luke: no, not at all. Lorelai's just threatening to stir the dinner and you and I both know the limitations of the Gilmore culinary skills.

Jess: pass the phone to her.

Luke: what? Did I hear that right?

Jess: yeah, you heard right. I was actually calling to get the number of the inn, I wanted to talk to Lorelai before I come down next month. Clear up a few things.

Luke: wow Jess, well okay. I'll pass you over.

Jess could hear Lorelai's shock as she got up to speed with what was going on.

 _"He wants to talk to me? Why? Please don't tell me he's going to ask my permission to propose because that's already happened one too many times for my liking and I don't know if I can go through that again."_

He could hear Lorelai clearly even though she wasn't actually talking to him, yet. Proposal huh? Seemed Rory had left one little detail out, it had to be Logan. It kinda made sense. So she'd had the world offered to her on a silver platter and turned it down? He felt a new level of admiration for Rory, it can't have been an easy decision for her and yet she hadn't taken the easy option. He also felt an almost painful sense of relief to realise that she had turned all that down. He couldn't offer her anything near what Logan had and he would never admit it to Rory but he did still sometimes wonder if he was truly enough for her. Jess couldn't show her the world like Logan could, not outside of the covers of a book anyway. He was cut off from his thoughts by Lorelai's voice finally cutting across the line.

Lorelai: Jess, Luke tells me you wanted to talk to me?

He heard the wariness in her voice.

Jess: I'm not going to propose.

Lorelai: well okay. Glad to get that concern out of the way. What exactly is it you do want?

Jess: I guess I just wanted to talk.

Lorelai: well you are known for your conversation skills.

Jess smirked at her sarcasm. At least she wasn't shouting at him or using that dry tone that he actually found a little terrifying.

Jess: I wanted to get a few things straight between us before Thanksgiving.

Lorelai: okay...

Jess: I don't know exactly what Rory has told you about us except that we are back together. We don't get a lot of time to talk and you're not exactly at the top of our list of conversation topics, no offense.

Lorelai: I know how it is - too busy making kissing sounds to each other through the speaker to find the time to talk about your girlfriend's mesmerising mother.

Jess: does Rory know you've been tapping her phone?

He could hear Lorelai laughing and knew he'd at least won the first round.

Jess: I just wanted to tell you it's different this time. I know I was a jerk in the past. Rory deserved more than I had to offer her and I ran away. I'm not that same guy anymore. I've worked really hard to get where I am. I have a steady job, my own apartment, my second book was published 6 weeks ago and we are already printing a second run. I love your daughter. Even when I was running away from her I loved her. I ran away for her then because I had to set her free.

Jess hadn't planned on saying all that but he couldn't take it back now. He sat listening to the silence on the line, waiting for Lorelai to respond.

Lorelai: You set her free and she came back to you. I won't lie and say I was over the moon when Rory told me she was seeing you again. I believe there may have been a few unrepeatable words uttered but at the end of the day I have to trust her judgment and let her make her own mistakes.

Jess: so you think this is a mistake?

Lorelai: no, I didn't mean it that way Jess.

Jess: okay. Well what did you mean?

Lorelai: look, I don't know how much Rory has told you about her life over the last few years and it's not my place to tell you her stories anyway. What I will tell you is she made a big mistake once and I called her on it and we didn't speak for months afterwards. It was the most difficult time in my life and I promised myself that unless she was at risk of bodily harm I would not intercede again. I'm not going to intercede here Jess and, for what it's worth, I don't think this is a mistake. You and Rory have both changed a lot. You're not teenagers anymore. That doesn't mean I'm not wary of your ability to break her heart, I just trust you not to do it again this time.

Jess: trust huh?

Lorelai: well that uncle of yours has been working on changing my opinion about you for months now, years really but I didn't have a good enough reason to let it work before. I was too content hating you back then, didn't want to have to find a new picture for my dart board. If Luke thinks you're worthy of my daughter then I figure it's time I gave you a second chance too.

Jess: Lorelai? Thanks. I appreciate it. I love your daughter and it's important to her that we get along so it's important to me too.

Lorelai: consider the slate clean.

Jess: I have to say, this conversation did not got at all like I thought it would.

Lorelai: how did you think it would go?

Jess: more shouting and maybe a little bit of grovelling.

Lorelai: you were prepared to grovel?

Jess: I was prepared to do whatever it took to make sure our visit next month won't be awkward and uncomfortable.

Lorelai: kinda wished I hadn't given in so easily now, sure would been nice to hear you beg.

Jess: well maybe you can come up with something between now and thanksgiving and I can make it up to you then.

Jess laughed as he could practically hear the cogs grinding in Lorelai's mind trying to conjure a plan to get her wish. She and her daughter really were frighteningly alike.

Lorelai: I think I liked you better when you were all about the monosyllables.

Jess: well what can I say, I'm a changed man, better get used to it because I'm not planning on going anywhere.

Lorelai: see you next month Jess.

Jess: say bye to Luke for me. Tell him I'll call him next week.

Lorelai: say hi to Rory for me.

Jess: you expect me to believe you're not going to call her yourself as soon as I hang up this phone?

Lorelai: you know, I think you just might be quick enough to keep up with her.

Jess: I'm always up for the challenge.

Lorelai: bye Jess.

Jess: good bye Lorelai.

Jess placed the phone on the table and raised his arms over his head, stretching his back in the chair. Shocked? Amused? Appeased? He searched for the right word to describe how he was feeling in that moment but despite his extensive vocabulary couldn't come up with one that fit. He did know one thing, suddenly he was looking forward to Thanksgiving for a reason other than seeing Rory and that was definitely a good feeling.

He wanted to call Rory but knew he'd just get a busy tone. He could wait. She always had been worth that.

 ** _A/N so apparently sleep is overrated and this story didn't want me getting any last night or a sleep in this morning either. I think this is all I've got in me for today but I'll hopefully have the next chapter up tomorrow. No lit this chapter but after the last chapter I figured I could get away with it. Rory's up next. I've got The Real Paul Anka on in the background as I type this - my 4 1/2 year old son is hooked on Gg and likes to pick random episodes and it always makes me especially happy when he picks a Jess centric one. Anyway, hope you're still enjoying this story, please leave a review if you've got the time, I really do appreciate your feedback. Enjoy your Friday :)_**


	32. Chapter 32

Rory: so you mean to tell me Jess Mariano, my Jess, called you?

Lorelai: even I couldn't make this stuff up kid.

Rory: huh.

Lorelai: He's clearly rubbed off on you.

Rory: I just can't believe he called you! What did he say?

Lorelai: surprisingly, quite a lot actually. Who knew that boy knew so many words. Do you think he always did or he just picked the verbal thing up in Philly? I hear it's full of people like him these days, can't blame a guy for wanting to fit in.

Rory: he always had the words mom he just didn't want to share them with anyone.

Lorelai: except you.

Rory: well, yeah. He was different with me. I tried to tell you that from the beginning but you never seemed to want to look past the town hoodlum label.

Lorelai: I'm sorry Rory I just wasn't very comfortable with him then.

Rory: and how comfortable are you with him now, after your little chat?

Lorelai: oh I don't know, somewhere between my favourite jeans and your flannel pjs that I st...borrowed.

Rory: firstly, I will expect my pyjamas to be washed and folded and waiting on my bed when I come to visit next month. Secondly that does sound pretty comfy.

Lorelai: well that was the purpose of his call - he didn't want things to be awkward when you guys come to stay next month.

Rory: he told you that was his reason?

Lorelai: yeah, he really did. Interesting hey? Guess he must really love you.

Rory smiled at her mother's teasing tone. She didn't know how he'd done it but somehow Jess had managed to change her mother's opinion of him - something she herself had failed to do despite multiple attempts over the years.

Rory: oh yeah, he does.

Lorelai: and on that note I'm going to let you go, Luke's got dinner ready and I just wanted to give you a quick call to tell you Jess called. We can catch up properly when I call you Sunday night, usual time.

Rory: enjoy your dinner. Say hi to Luke for me.

Lorelai: love you hun.

Rory: love you too mom.

Rory ended the call with her mother and immediately dialled Jess's number.

Jess: hey you. I wasn't expecting you to call for at least another half hour.

Rory: Luke was serving dinner.

Jess: so you have been talking to your mom then.

Rory: she had a few interesting things to tell me.

Jess: is that so?

Rory: you know it.

Jess: and?

Rory: and I think that was by far the sweetest thing you've ever done for me.

Jess: I just didn't want old grudges to get in the way of our visit.

Rory: I know and I appreciate it Jess, so much. I knew if she gave you a proper chance she would like you. She'd see you the way I have always seen you and recognise how well you suit me and me, you. Maybe you should call my grandma and see if you can work your charms on her too?

Jess: I reckon I'm all out of charm for today.

Rory: probably too late to call her now anyway.

Jess: yeah, probably. Hey Rory? Can I ask you something?

Suddenly the mood have shifted from jovial to serious and Rory didn't know why. She guessed she was a out to find out.

Rory: sure, anything.

Jess: before I spoke to your mom I overheard her talking to Luke. It was a bit of a ramble but in the midst of it she may have mentioned a proposal and she was definitely referring to you. Did Logan propose to you Rory?

No point beating around the bush.

Rory: yes.

Jess: why didn't you tell me?

He didn't sound angry, just hurt. Why hadn't she told him? It's not like it mattered anymore anyway but she didn't want him to worry that she was keeping things from him.

Rory: honestly? I don't know why I didn't tell you. I guess I'd put it behind me and moved on and didn't want to think about it anymore.

Jess: I take it you turned him down?

Rory: yes, of course I did! It wasn't right. If it was right I wouldn't have hesitated to answer him but I did, I hesitated. I said no and that was it. Logan gave me an ultimatum - all or nothing - but I'd already made my mind up so Logan left for California and I graduated Yale.

Jess: and then you send me a text message out of the blue what, two, three days later?!

Suddenly Jess did sound angry and Rory couldn't blame him.

Rory: I know it looks bad when you put it that way but it's more complicated than that.

Jess: 5 months Rory. We've been doing this thing for 5 months and you never once mentioned you almost agreed to marry that jerk? I don't even know why I'm angry Rory, I didn't think I was but I guess I am. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve to be your rebound anymore than I deserved you coming here and kissing me when you were still with him. Are there any more details you conveniently forgot to tell me?

Suddenly all the pain and the hurt she'd caused him that night came out in the bitterness of his words. Rory couldn't stop the tears from falling and was soon sobbing uncontrollably, unable to speak. Jess sat in silence on the other end waiting for her to say something but what was there to say? He was right, he didn't deserve to find out like this. If the roles had been reversed she would be angry too. She'd feel deceived. All she knew was what was in her heart and so that was what she decided to tell him.

Rory: Jess, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. Please believe me when I say I didn't keep it from you on purpose. I love you Jess. Do you even realise how much? Yes I was sad when it ended with Logan, we'd been together for 3 years, but when you replied to my text message that night you were like a light in the darkness only you weren't taking me on some detour, you were guiding me back to where I had always belonged, where I was always meant to be: by your side, in your life, in your arms, in your heart. You are not my rebound Jess, you're my redemption, my reward.

There was more silence between them until Jess eventually spoke.

Jess: can you do me a favour?

Rory: sure, anything.

Jess: tell me about any other significant events in you life so I don't find out about them through your mother?

Rory: I will Jess. I promise.

Jess: I think I'm going to go now Rory, I'm pretty beat.

Rory: sure, I'm pretty tired myself. Jess? Are we okay?

Jess: yes Rory, we're okay.

Rory: I love you Jess.

Jess: I know you do. I love you too Rory.

Rory: Dream about me?

Jess: it's not like I have a choice.

Rory waited for Jess to hang up this time then lay back on the bed, letting out a weary sigh. Everything had a way of getting distorted across the mile that separated them. They needed to be back within at least two feet of each other, everything always fell back into place for them in those moments. She had to hope this time would be no different. The next 5 weeks could not pass by quickly enough.

 ** _A/N Thanksgiving is coming up very soon along with more Luke and Lorelai._**


	33. Chapter 33

_November_

2 weeks, 13 days actually, not that he was counting down or anything... Jess had been writing again and it felt good but it was no substitute for having Rory in his arms. He was writing about her again. About them. Pure fiction though, of the wishful thinking variety. Who knew if they'd be so lucky. He'd immortalise them regardless and if perchance they didn't work out at least they'd get their happily ever after on the page. Hope kept him from believing the worst and accepting the best was theirs to have and to hold as quickly as time could offer it up to them. His new story was metaphorically theirs only in reverse, from old age to youth and every significant moment in between, beginning and ending in the same place - a solitary cabin in the woods with a view over a sparkling lake and a crumbling bridge that had once upon a time spanned from shore to shore. It was not going to be an easy journey for the characters and there would be loss and heartache and betrayal but there would also be joy and love and friendship keeping them connected over the course of their time together.

He'd abandoned his desk and cracked open a beer over an hour ago and had been alternating between sipping the amber liquid and staring at the blank TV screen, lost in thought ever since. He'd never been much of a drinker, contrary to common assumption, and was truth be told rather shamefully a light weight. Half a bottle of wine or 4 beers was usually taxi time for him but he was now in for the night, safe and sound so another one wasn't going to harm anyone. The Light and The Dark had been reviewed in The New York Times, if that wasn't a good reason to celebrate then he didn't know what was. The guys had taken him out after work for a few rounds before he made his excuses to leave. His new story was calling him back and once he was home again he'd sat at his desk and written for 2 straight hours. When the thoughts stopped flowing he followed his buddy Ernest's advice and left the editing for the morning when his mind was clearer. He hadn't told Rory yet, he didn't want to text it to her, he wanted to hear her squeal of delight and wanted to hear the affection in her voice as she told him how proud she was.

He finished his beer and suddenly felt a desperate need to hear her voice and grabbed his phone, dialling her number without even checking the time.

Rory: this better be important.

Oh shit, he'd woken her up!

Jess: I just wanted to hear your voice.

Rory: Jess? Have you been drinking?

Jess: yes.

Rory: how much have you had?

Jess: what is much?

Rory: oh you! Don't think you can wake me at 2 in the morning and get all cute with me so I'll forgive you!

Jess: you're so adorable when you're cross.

Rory: Jess!

Jess: and you're so sexy when you're indignant.

Rory: I'm not playing this game with you.

Jess: I love it when you play hard to get.

Rory: really? Cliches already? So I gather you're at the Ginsberg end of the much scale.

Jess: _Follow your inner moonlight; don't hide your madness._

Rory: seriously?

Jess: _You say what you want to say when you don't care who's listening._

Rory: did you really call me at 2am to recite poetry to me?

Jess: _Poetry is not an expression of the party line, it's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think._

Rory: you must be the only person in the world who can converse in verse when you're drunk!

Jess: you're so hot when you're exasperated.

Rory: and you're so irritatingly sweet when you're wasted.

Jess: _We're all golden sunflowers on the inside._

She was giggling softly now and the sweet sound changed the terrain of his skin, causing it to rise in tiny bumps.

Rory: please at least tell me you're home in bed?

Jess: home but not in bed - it misses you too much and won't let me sleep.

Rory: your bed won't let you sleep?

Jess: it's so cold and empty.

Rory: so tell me then, what's the reason behind your inebriation?

Jess: are you trying to confuse me with big words?

Rory: It seemed more eloquent than asking you why you're drunk dialling me at 2am.

Jess: my book made The Times.

Rory: The New York Times? They reviewed your book?

Jess: yes and yes.

Rory: Jess! That's incredible! Oh my gosh we are so celebrating this when I see you.

Jess: 12 more days.

Rory: you're counting down?

Jess: simple math.

Rory: you're counting down!

Jess: it's not like I'm marking the days off my calendar.

Rory: I couldn't believe you less!

Jess: that's your prerogative I guess.

Rory: seriously Jess? Prerogative? You are drunk! How you manage to outsmart me even when you can't control your limbs is beyond me. I give up, I'm never going to stump you, I'm going to quit trying.

Jess: but I love you trying.

Rory: The New York Times reviewed your book. Wow! That's just...wow. I am so proud of you Jess.

Jess: I love hearing you tell me that.

Rory: well I'll be telling you so much you'll get sick of it soon.

Jess: how could I ever get sick of anything you do Rory Gilmore? I love you so fucking much.

Rory: why don't you go and get into bed and I'll talk to you until you fall asleep?

Jess: _Are you my angel?_

Rory: no, just the woman who's in love with you.

Jess: _Your name is written in heaven._

Rory: that's good to know. Goodnight Jess.

Jess: I miss you Rory.

Rory: I know Jess, I miss you too. We'll be seeing each other soon.

Jess: 12 more days.

With that final thought in his mind Jess slipped into a deep, drunken sleep and all memory of his conversation with Rory was lost amongst his dreams.

 ** _A/N quotes in italics are all borrowed from Allen Ginsberg. (Because of course bibliophile Jess talks in quotes when he's drunk ;) I could practically hear Rory's exasperated sigh as I wrote this)_**

 ** _I hope you enjoyed this chapter, the idea came out of nowhere but I had a lot of fun writing it. Rory's view will be up as soon as I get the chance to write it and then it'll be time for giving thanks and getting cosy at The Dragonfly. Luckily I won't make you all wait 12 more days before these two are reunited._**


	34. Chapter 34

Rory woke to her own alarm the next morning. She'd set it after her very early morning phone call from Jess. Judging by the state he was in he'd be lucky to surface by midday! She smiled as she remembered his news - the New York Times - that was major! She really was so proud of him. She had some potential news of her own to share but she wanted to think it over by herself for a while first. She'd tell him when he picked her up from the airport in Hartford. 12 more days. Jess wasn't the only one counting down.

It was finally lunchtime and Rory and Annie were eating takeaway burgers in the grounds of the Convention Centre. Rory hadn't told Annie her news either but she knew she suspected something and had been asking a lot of questions about next year. Rory decided to throw her friend off the scent by sharing Jess's news.

"You know the book I lent you? Jess's book?" Rory waited for Annie to nod in affirmation before continuing. "They reviewed it in the New York Times!"

"That's amazing news! Well done to Jess!" Annie raised her soda to cheers with Rory.

"I know right? This could be his big moment. There's no telling where things could go from here," Rory suddenly grasped the greater implications of this new exposure. This could mean a bigger publisher could pick him up. More press. Book tours and signings. Oh how he would hate that! She smiled to herself regardless, this was the beginning of something incredible for Jess she just knew it.

"Did you read the review yet?" Annie asked.

"No, I only just found out about it this morning and it was too late to buy a copy. I'm sure Matt will have bought a bunch of copies. I'll look it up online later but it's not the same as reading it in real print on actual paper. There's something so comforting about black ink stains on your fingertips you know?" Rory sighed nostalgically. She missed seeing her words on paper rather than a backlit screen. She knew online was the way of the future but she was old fashioned when it came to her reading material. She longed for the day she could cut out a press clipping with her byline to add to her scrapbook.

"Well, I for one thought his book was a very compelling read. I read it in one sitting and when I got to the end! Well, you know how it ends, you've read it at least 17 times already right? I could honestly say it was one of the most memorable endings I've read in a long time. People don't write like that anymore. There was no formulaic pattern of moments, no cliches, no superfluous explanations - just 127 pages of perfectly chosen words that ultimately spelled out hope." Annie finished speaking and Rory looked at her in shock and awe.

"Maybe Jess should've gotten you to write a review for him or better yet the blurb for inside the back cover! Are you sure you want a career in politics? If not I think I might have an idea what else you might be excellent at!" Rory openly praised her friend.

"You know as well as I do, good jobs in our field are few and far between at the moment and for every job there's hundreds of applicants with more experience and a thicker portfolio. I don't want to be doing this forever but I'm happy enough doing it for right now." Annie shrugged her shoulders resignedly.

They sat in silence as they finished their lunch then headed back indoors for the afternoon session. Rory checked her phone one last time as she took her seat. There was a message from Jess.

Jess: _I have this disease late at night sometimes, involving alcohol and the telephone._

Oh Jess! Rory shook her head and smiled as she typed and sent a reply.

Rory: all out of Ginsberg quotes?

Jess: Vonnegut seemed more appropriate in the painfully bright light of day.

Rory: _So it goes..._

Jess: _It was very exciting for her, taking his dignity away in the name of love._

His borrowed words never failed to make her melt.

Rory: _If this isn't nice, I don't know what is._

Jess: I'm happy too Rory.

As much as she would have happily carried on in this game with him all afternoon the break was almost over and the room was quickly refilling as everyone returned to their seats.

Rory: got to get back to work now. call me tonight? 8ish?

Jess: I'll try and be sober this time.

Rory: I kinda like drunk Jess.

Jess: oh yeah?

Rory: yeah. Really gotta go now xx

Jess: go xx

Rory switched her phone off and zipped it away inside her bag just as the first speaker for the afternoon stepped up to the mic. Back to work now, she told herself, but nothing could keep the smile from her face.

 ** _A/N all quotes in italics are borrowed from Kurt Vonnegut_**


	35. Chapter 35

_Thanksgiving Eve_

Jess was 2 hours early for Rory's flight but he didn't care. He'd woken up that morning, showered, dressed, packed and left and didn't stop until he parked his car at the airport. Rory had told him there was something they needed to talk about and, while her tone had given nothing away, he couldn't help the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach every time he thought at it.

She hadn't wanted to tell him over the phone so he'd had days to conjure possibilities in his mind - every single one of them bad bar one but he wouldn't allow himself to believe that could be true, not until the words were spoken from Rory's mouth. It sure would be nice though - Rory in Philadelphia. Rory with him in Philadelphia. He shook his head before the idea had a chance to gain too much of a hold. It might not even be that. It could be any number of things. He pulled a book from his back pocket and tried to shut out the crowds as he opened it and began to read.

It was Rory who found Jess in the end. He'd been so caught up in the pages, time had passed without him registering it and suddenly here she was in front of him, tapping her toe in mock impatience on the floor, her smile deceiving the exasperated look she was going for.

"Must be a pretty extraordinary book you're reading there," it was so good to hear her voice, especially her teasing tones. "You might have to let me borrow it sometime."

"I'd only be too happy to lend it to you," he passed the book to her, face down. "One of the greatest stories ever told. Be sure to let me know what you think of it."

He watched her face distort as she turned the book over to reveal the title.

"Was this a set up?" she demanded.

"No, I swear. Just a highly amusing coincidence." Jess laughed as the crinkles in her brow deepened as she took in the cover once more. "Maybe it's a sign though."

"A sign? Well I am pretty tired and this book never did fail to send me to sleep. Yeah I think you might be onto something there." she smiled sweetly at him.

"I can think of a much better way to wear you out and make you sleepy," Jess watched her face in anticipation of the blush he knew would creep up into her cheeks. This was what he missed most over the phone - her face gave so much away.

"And miss the chance to read Hemingway?"

"The choice is yours," Jess pulled her into his arms and kissed her, breaking them out of the subtext. "Hi."

"Hi," Rory relaxed into his arms.

"Shall we?" Jess shouldered Rory's work bag and grabbed her suitcase leaving her with just two smaller bags to carry herself and one free hand each to hold onto the other.

Jess barely said a word the entire way to Stars Hollow. Rory rambled on in her sweet way about the trail and Annie and her plans to catch up with Lane and her kids while they were visiting. He listened to every word but she never once mentioned the one thing he wanted to hear. What's your news Rory? What is it you needed to tell me in person? This rambling could be seen as a typical Gilmore evasive technique. By the time they saw the Stars Hollow sign through the windscreen he was imaging the worst.

"Where to first?" Jess turned to Rory as they drove through the centre of the tiny town.

"How about we settle in at the inn first because you know once Mom gets a hold of me we will be lucky if she lets me go before next Tuesday. I could do with a shower and a change of clothes anyway."

"And a nap?" he teased her hopefully.

"If you insist," she smiled her coy smile at him and he kept on driving until they reached The Dragonfly.

He hadn't been to the inn before but he'd heard a lot about it from his Uncle. It was nice, as far as inns went. Not too frilly, not too pink, not bad at all. He was glad they were staying here and not at Lorelai's. As much as he felt he'd made progress with Lorelai, sleeping with Rory in her childhood bedroom under her mom's roof wasn't exactly appealing to him. No, this was much better. Everyone had their own space to retreat to. He was pretty sure if he asked her, Lorelai would share his view but that was a conversation he was never going to have with his girlfriend's mother.

Jess took Rory's bags up to their room himself, placing them under the window as he looked around. There was a vase of sunflowers on a small writing desk in the corner and a note propped up against the glass.

"I'm going to assume this is for you," Jess handed the note to Rory and watched as she opened it.

"Actually, it's for you," she let out a giggle and gave it back to him.

Jess took it and read it. He'd been half correct in his assumption - it was from Lorelai.

 _Welcome to The Dragonfly Inn._

 _You are staying in "The Writer's Room"_

 _I hope you find inspiration here._

He turned the card over in his hand, missing the joke. He looked at Rory who was still giggling.

"Pretty flowers," Rory ran a fingertip over the bright yellow petals.

"I think they're for me too actually," Jess pointed out.

"I guess they are," Rory began to giggle again.

"I don't get it," he waited for her to fill him in.

"That's the point. There's nothing to get, she's trying to psych you out by being nice to you," Rory shrugged as if it made complete sense.

"Is that so? Well I guess two can play at that game," Jess threw the card back toward the desk and took Rory's hands in his, pulling her toward him for a kiss. "Did you still want to shower and change?"

"Well, yes but..." he watched as her eyese went from,him to the bed and then back to him.

"You mother will be expecting us to jump into bed and not turn up at her place until dinner time, I suggest we subvert expectation and head over there soon."

"But..." Rory looked from Jess to the bed again.

"I said _soon_ not right this minute," Jess led Rory into the bathroom, turned the water on and began to get undressed.

"I could get used to you trying to impress my mother," Rory followed his example and did the same.

"Can we please not talk about your mother when I'm naked and about to take you in the shower?"

"I'll add it to the rule list." she agreed as she joined him under the water.

An hour later Rory was drying her hair with the hairdryer as Jess hung the towels back in the bathroom and remade the bed.

"You do know they have maids to do that don't you?" Rory watched as he smoothed the last of the wrinkles and realigned the pillows, placing the mints back in the centre or each.

"You do know that maids like to gossip don't you?" Jess retorted.

"Two really can play at this game, mom won't know what's hit her. You might want to borrow this though," Rory held the hairdryer out to him now she was finished with it. "Wouldn't want your wet hair to unravel the innocent facade your cultivating here."

Jess scoffed at the suggestion but dried his hair just the same. Rory was right, it was all about the little details.

"Should I get her some flowers on the way or would that be too much?" Jess was only half kidding.

"No, I think that would be just enough," Rory slid her feet into her tall boots and zipped them up.

"You look beautiful Rory," Jess crossed the room and wrapped his arms around her waist, careful not to wrinkle her skirt. "Shall we go surprise your mother then?"

"I can't wait to see the look on her face," Rory smiled gleefully in anticipation.

Jess wanted to ask her what she'd wanted to talk to him about but didn't want to ruin the moment. She'd tell him when she was ready. He just had to hope it wasn't what he feared.


	36. Chapter 36

There was no answer when they knocked on the front door so Rory took out her spare key and let them in.

"Mom? Are you here? I'm home! Jess and I are here!" she walked through the house ending up in the kitchen but it too was empty.

"Huh, fancy that. Guess she wasn't expecting us after all." Jess smirked.

They heard a thump on the stairs and turned to go back towards the lounge room.

"Hi! You're here! I thought you'd be..." Lorelai was unsuccessfully smoothing her hair down with one hand and straightening her sweater with the other.

"Please don't finish that sentence," Rory insisted raising her hands to cover her ears.

"I was going to say I thought you'd be enjoying the...ambience of the Inn," Lorelai covered.

"Huh, is that what the kids are calling it these days?" Jess joked back.

Another thud came from upstairs and Rory looked first at her mother then at Jess waiting for one of them to comment.

The three just stood there in silence until Luke appeared at the top of the stairs. He'd missed a button and his hat was on the right way for what was very likely the first time in his life.

"Uh, hi guys. Hi Rory, hi Jess. I was just..." He bumbled.

"Enjoying the ambiance?" Jess supplied.

Rory and Lorelai both burst out laughing and Luke just looked from one to the other clearly not even surprised anymore at not getting the joke. Jess just shrugged his shoulders at him.

"You just had to be there Uncle Luke," he explained.

"Oh, believe me, I know. I have enough trouble keeping up with one Gilmore woman now I have to contend with two of them again," Luke's voice was gruff but his eyes were full of affection for Rory and her mum.

"We love you too Luke," Rory assured him, smiling as a bashful smile lit up his face.

"I'd better get back. See you for dinner?" Luke looked at Lorelai for affirmation.

"You bring the food, I'll provide the ambiance," Lorelai smiled sweetly at him while Rory and Jess burst out laughing again.

"I don't even want to know." Luke shook his head and walked to the door letting himself out.

"I'll be back in a few," Jess told Rory then followed his uncle out the door.

Rory watched him go then turned to her mother for a long awaited hug.

"Oh kid I can't believe you're actually here! You're home! I've missed you so much," Lorelai had tears in her eyes.

"I missed you too mom. It's good to be back." Rory hugged her tightly. She had a big decision to make and was tempted to ask her advice but couldn't find the words. All day she'd waited for the right moment to talk to Jess about it but it just never came. Too distracted by the ambiance. Rory giggled at the word and Lorelai looked at her questioningly.

"Ambiance," Rory explained.

They both dissolved into giggles and made their way into the kitchen for coffee.

"You look happy Rory," Lorelai told her honestly.

"I am happy Mom. Well, I'm happy now. I'm happy to be here with you and with Jess and with Luke. Back in this town, my bag unpacked for a week not a night. I'm happy." Rory sighed a heavy sigh.

"So I take it you haven't been happy before now? I thought you were enjoying your job Rory?" Rory avoided her mother's insightful gaze and was saved from answering her when Jess returned.

"Hey, don't let me stop you two catching up." Rory could see him looking from her mother and back to her, trying to gauge the reason for the sudden silence. "I can go hang out with Luke if you want some girl time."

Lorelai burst out laughing.

"Of all the words I never thought I'd hear out of your mouth! Girl time!" Rory watched on amused as her mother continued to laugh uncontrollably.

"Hey mom? Earth to Lorelai! It really wasn't that funny," Rory pushed her mother's coffee cup closer to her, hoping the fumes would calm her insanity. "Sit Jess, we've got all week to catch up but thank you for offering." She really meant it. He'd missed her too and yet he was willing to give up their first afternoon together so she could hang out with her mom and that meant a lot to her.

"Dare I ask what the plan is for tomorrow?" Jess brought up a new topic much to Rory's relief.

"Yeah Mom, explain to me again why we're not going to see Grandma and Grandpa and where exactly we will be eating our turkey," Rory promoted Lorelai.

"Okay, well your grandparents decided to go away for thanksgiving this year. They did tell me why and where and who but I filled the details away under stuff I don't really need to know and promptly forgot about it. They did send their love and made me promise we would go to their place for Christmas dinner instead. Tomorrow will simply be a table for four at Luke's, just like old times."

"Are we all invited for Christmas?" Rory asked.

"If you want to be," Lorelai directed her answer to Jess.

"Yeah, I want to be. As long as Rory wants me there." She could feel his eyes on her but didn't meet them. They hadn't talked about Christmas yet.

"Of course I do," Rory finally looked at Jess. "I guess I've just been focusing on getting through to this holiday I hadn't given the next one much thought yet." It was true enough for a partial lie. She couldn't do this anymore. "Hey mom, I know we just got here but would you excuse us for a little while?"

"Yeah sure hun, Luke should be back over with dinner around 6. Be back by then?" Rory could hear the concern in her mother's voice.

"See you at 6," Rory agreed then turned to Jess. "Would you like to go visit the old bridge with me?"

"Sure," he agreed but he wouldn't meet her eyes.

"Have a good walk," Lorelai bid them goodbye as they both rose from their chairs, pushing them back into place at the kitchen table and grabbed their coats on their way out the door.


	37. Chapter 37

Jess held Rory's hand tightly in his the entire way to the bridge. After she'd brushed off the discussion of Christmas so quickly the unsettled feeling he'd been harbouring had suddenly taken over and he was afraid to speak in case his voice gave him away. They stopped midway but neither of them spoke for a long while, each just staring out across the water, remembering all the other times they'd spent together here. Jess remained stubbornly silent, Rory was the one who wanted to talk so she had to be the one to start this.

"I can't do this anymore!" her voice finally broke through the silence like a shouted whisper.

Jess felt his heart shatter and looked at her unable to speak but the silence was quickly filled again by Rory continuing her outburst.

"I'm sick of living out of a suitcase and not feeling like I have a home and I can't stand the thought of going back out there again and getting on that stupid bus and listening to the same address over and over again. I want a real job in a real office with my own desk that I can keep photographs on and maybe I'd even get a plant or some plastic flowers or something, anything that would be mine and permanent and I wouldn't have to pack into another stupid suitcase at the end of another stupid day. Just because I had a plan that I could do this traveling journalist thing when I was 16 years old doesn't mean I have to keep on trucking when it's making me miserable. Plans can change, right? I've changed and being back here with you, with my family, I know that I don't want to do this anymore. I can't do this anymore."

Jess was still speechless but his heart seemed to have returned to working order and his pulse rate was settling back down to a relatively normal pace. She was quitting? What did that mean? Was she moving back to Stars Hollow? Was she going to come and live in Philadelphia?

"Do you have a new plan?" Jess dared to ask her.

"Do you know what I told Christiane Amanpour when she asked me what kind of journalist I wanted to be? I told her I wanted to work for a major daily! I think _that's_ my new plan. I have until Monday to decide."

"Monday?" None of this was making any sense to him, yet.

"The editor at the Providence Journal called me last week to offer me the position I turned down back in May. The woman who took the job is due to go on maternity leave at the end of January and they offered me a contract. It would only be for as long as she's away but it would mean an office and a desk and..."

"Picture frames, a dead plant. I get it Rory. So, Providence huh?" Jess could feel the band around his chest loosening.

"It's only 4 hours by train." Rory met his eyes for the first time.

"Look Rory, if this is what you want to do then I guess I just have to support you. If you really think this will make you happy then I think you should accept." He told her sincerely, still mulling it over in his own mind. It wasn't exactly what he'd been hoping she'd tell him but it was a far cry from his worst case scenario.

"It might only be for 7 months, a year at most. We can take turns travelling to each other or we can find somewhere and meet in the middle. I'll keep applying for jobs in Philadelphia..."

"Or maybe I could move to Providence..."

"I can't ask you to do that Jess! I can't ask you to leave Truncheon! You've worked so hard helping build it up, I can't be the reason you walk away from it."

"Rory? The Light and The Dark is doing surprisingly well and these days I spend more time writing than actually helping in the store anyway. I can still go in for events and stocktake and any other time the guys need a hand and they can stop hassling me about when I'll have the next book written which will happen a lot quicker if my muse and I are living under the same roof. Besides, I hear it's only 4 hours by train, what's 4 hours?" He leaned closer to Rory, kissing her to convince her he was speaking the truth.

"So maybe you could move to Providence." she repeated his words thoughtfully.

"As long as you're sure you want me to." Jess searched her eyes for assurance.

"How can you even ask me that?"

He pulled Rory into his arms and hugged her into his chest. They both stood there in silence as the cold evening air swirled around them. Suddenly Rory began to laugh. Jess loosened his grip on her so he could look into her face and make sure she wasn't hysterical and gave her a quizzical look.

"It's snowing Jess! If my mother was here she'd say it was a sign!"

"A sign that we should get back inside before we freeze?"

"No silly, a sign that everything is good and right and as it should be," she explained.

"Huh, I never knew snow could be so informative," Jess mocked.

Rory just slapped him playfully on the shoulder before grabbing his hand and dragging her across the bridge in the direction of her childhood home.

"Come on, let's go share our news," his Rory was back. His happy, vibrant, self assured Rory was back and he knew in that moment moving to Providence was a small price to pay to keep her from disappearing again.

They entered the Gilmore house, leaving their coats and boots in the hall before continuing into the kitchen where Lorelai and Luke were sitting at the table, deep in conversation, their dinner waiting in brown paper bags on the bench.

"Hey kid, what's that smile for? Actually, I take that back, I don't want to know," Lorelai looked from her daughter to him and back again.

"Actually, I think you will want to know this Mom, we've got some news." Jess squeezed her hand in encouragement as she spoke.

"Oh my gosh are you pregnant?" Lorelai squealed.

"No," Rory cut her off.

"Engaged?" Lorelai continued.

"No," Rory shook her head this time.

"Should we keep this guessing game going or should I just let you tell me?"

"You're the one that started it. You could've been celebrating by now if you'd just let me tell you."

Jess has been watching Luke following this conversation and smiled to himself. He wondered if he seemed as happy to Luke as Luke looked to be to him.

"Celebrating? So I take it this is good news then? Something I'll be happy to hear?" she looked sceptically at Jess. She'd come a long way in accepting him as a fixture in Rory's life but he could tell she was still a little wary of him and he couldn't blame her for that.

"Mom?"

"Okay Rory, I'm ready. Tell me your news."

"We're moving to Providence,"

"We as in you and Jess?"

"Yes."

"Random but okay..."

"Remember the job I turned down back in May when I was still hoping to get the Reston?" Rory began to explain.

"The Pro Jo?"

"Yes, The Providence Journal. Turns out the woman who took the job is pregnant and they need someone to cover her maternity leave and the editor called me to see if there was any chance I was still looking for a job. I have to let her know by Monday but we've talked, Jess and I have talked, and I'm going to take it," Rory looked at him as she finished and he smiled at her, nodding in agreement.

"But your job is in Philadelphia?" Lorelai turned Jess.

He could see the confusion in her face dissipate as he explained the rest of the details, as far as they'd figured them out anyway.

"Obviously we've got a few technicalities to sort out in the meantime but we've got 2 months to sort out the little details," he shrugged.

"Okay Rory, I believe you now, he can speak full sentences and use big words." Lorelai turned back to Jess. "This is a pretty big sacrifice you'd be making for my daughter."

"It doesn't seem that big to me. Seems I've got a lot to gain actually," Jess told her sincerely.

"Well I think this is just great! I always knew you two would figure this out. I knew it," Luke shook his head and smiled at his nephew, his eyes full of pride.

"I think this calls for cake!" Lorelai went the fridge and returned with a cake Jess could only assume Luke had brought over for dessert.

"Or maybe a nice healthy salad first? How can you possibly...oh never mind, who wants coffee?" Luke stood up and went about fixing two large cups of coffee for the two Gilmore women who were busy working their way through the cake as Jess watched on in amusement. Luke served up some dinner for himself and Jess and they too sat down to eat. He recalled the time Luke had told him that Rory came with her whole family and suddenly he felt lucky that she did and hopeful that he might one day be a permanent part of it.

 _ **A/N thank you to all the guest reviewers who've found and commented on my story. I hope you're still following and enjoying it.**_


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

Thanksgiving Day

"I don't ever want to leave this bed," Rory moaned as she rolled over and rested her head back onto her pillow.

"No arguments here," Jess mirrored her movements. "It is a very comfy bed."

"Maybe we can steal it for our new place?" Rory suggested, a mischievous sparkle in her eye.

"Or we could tell your mother what we've been doing this morning and then rescue it off the bonfire while she's trying to find the matches," Jess countered.

"I like the way you think, let someone else figure out how to get it down the stairs and then take it. I'm glad you're on my team," Rory rolled back onto her side to look at Jess.

"I'm glad I'm on your side too," he told her as he lifted her hand to his mouth, lightly kissing her fingertips.

"So, you're still feeling good about our plans this morning?" Rory asked him tentatively.

"I'm in no hurry to leave this bed, I thought we'd already established that?" he couldn't help but tease her when she was looking so adorably flushed and bedraggled.

"You know that's not what I meant."

"Yes Rory, I'm still feeling good about the idea of moving to Providence with you. It all seems a little unreal and I do still have to discuss it with Matt and Chris and make sure I'll have some semblance of a job myself. Details aside though, I'm happy Rory, happy and relieved."

Rory snuggled into his chest and let out a contented sigh. A second later she sat bolt upright in the bed, his last word registering in her mind.

"Relieved?" she looked at him questioningly.

"You told me we needed to talk, what's a guy supposed to think?" he gave her a moment to figure it out.

"Oh Jess, I never thought of it like that. Oh Jess, I'm so sorry. You know I'm not going anywhere right? You're stuck with me." She resumed her position, cuddling into his side where she fit best.

They lay there in silence, lost in their own separate thoughts for a while.

"Hey Rory?"

"Yes Jess?"

"This is all happening pretty fast isn't it?"

"I guess. Sometimes it doesn't seem fast enough."

"Yeah, I know want you mean."

"I know I want this Jess, you and me together in the same city, the same apartment, the same bed. Even if maybe it is a little soon, I'm ready. What's soon anyway?"

"You're right," Jess agreed. "I thought I was ready for this 3 1/2 years ago. Doesn't seem too soon at all when I look at it that way. I've loved you for such a long time Rory Gilmore."

"Are you trying to make us late for lunch?" Rory teased, the mood suddenly too serious, too sentimental.

"Maybe."

It was already after midday by the time Rory gave her hair a final check in the mirror and zipped up her boots. Jess sat watching her get ready from the chair at the desk.

"Remind me to tell your mother how inspiring I find this room," his tone was serious but his eyes were twinkling with laughter.

"I see you're leaving the bed making to the professionals today?" Rory gestured to the dishevelled sheets.

Jess just shrugged at her. "I thought it might make the whole bed stealing scenario happen a little quicker this way."

Rory shook her head at him and grabbed her coat and bag and walked out the door with Jess following closely behind her.

The diner was filled with an assortment of townspeople when they arrived. All eyes flew to the couple in the doorway when the bell signalled their arrival.

"Over here Rory, Jess." Lorelai waved them over to a table by the window.

"Happy Thanksgiving Lorelai," Jess handed over the bunch of red and orange flowers they'd picked up on the way.

"Oh really? You bought me flowers?" Lorelai uttered in disbelief. Rory watched on amused as her boyfriend was suddenly rendered shy. She'd guess he'd never bought a girlfriend's mother flowers before. He hadn't really thought this through beyond continuing their little game.

"He also wanted to thank you for putting us in such an inspiring room, didn't you Jess?" Oh how she loved to see him squirm.

Jess leant close to whisper in her ear, "I thought you were supposed to be on my side."

"All's fair in love and war," she kissed him then took the seat opposite her mom. Jess sat beside her and took her hand and held it in his lap.

"Hey sugar!" There was no mistaking Babette's voice as it echoed across the room. She came over and stood by their table, dragging Morey over with her. "We're off now Lorelai, thank Luke for us. It was a beautiful meal, isn't that right Morey? Turkey was just the way I like it and those yams! Wow! Might have to steal me the recipe for those hey sugar?" Babette winked at Lorelaiconspiratorially.

"Sure thing Babette, I'll see what I can do," Lorelaiagreed.

"And you Rory, sweetie! So good to see you home and looking so grown up! Isn't she looking grown up Morey? More beautiful than ever. And I think I can tell why," Rory could feel her blush deepening with every wink Babette sent her way. "I always knew you two would find your way back to each other. Him with that hair and you with those eyes, you're destined to make beautiful babies. I see you got that kissing thing sorted out too. You let me know if you need advice in any other areas. You know where to find me. Anyway, so great to see you all. Pop around before you leave again Rory. The gnomes have missed you. See ya Lorelai, see ya Jess. Have a happy thanksgiving," she finally finished and with a nod goodbye from Morey they left the diner.

"Things really never do change around here do they?" Jess asked bemused.

"Well apparently you two have gotten better at the whole kissing thing since last time but aside from that, no. Same old Stars Hollow. That's one of the things I love about this place though, sometimes monotony can be comforting," Lorelai told him thoughtfully.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Mind if I borrow that line sometime? It's a good line," Jess met her eyes across the table.

"Well I guess, I mean you did buy me flowers I kinda feel like I owe you something in return," Lorelai smiled.

Luke came out from the kitchen and noticing Rory and Jess had arrived came over to the table to greet them. When he spotted the flowers on the table he let out an exasperated sigh.

"I thought we'd been over this? A conclusion was brought was it not? I distinctly remember you agreeing to never bring me flowers on thanksgiving again. I still don't have a vase to put them in and they will still be sitting there in the morning limp and lifeless on account of the non existent vase and their unnecessary death will only provide further proof to my argument that you shouldn't have bought them for me in the first place!" Luke finished his rant then looked at the three laughing faces surrounding him.

"They're not for you Luke," Lorelai told him. "Jess bought them for me."

"Don't try and drag my nephew into this."

"No really Luke, Jess gave them to her," Rory took a turn trying to explain while Lorelai was still giggling across the table and Luke didn't know quite what to believe.

"So you mean to tell me Jess, my nephew, gave you flowers?" Luke tried to wrap his mind around it but it seemed too strange.

"I can show you the receipt if you like," Jess rummaged through his wallet, handing the piece of paper to his uncle who looked at it then shook his head and walked back out to the kitchen.

"Oh that was so much fun! I haven't heard a Luke rant to rival that since the butter and peanut butter argument we had last June." Lorelai could hardly contain her excitement. "We so need to plan our next scheme, how many shades of purple should we aim for this time?"

"I'm not sure I like you two getting along after all," Rory looked between her mother and her boyfriend with a frown on her face. "I think this could be a very dangerous combination. You're both far too scheming and alike for anyone's good. Poor Luke."

"What if we promise to always include you in our plans?" Lorelai bargained.

"Well, I guess I could drive the getaway car," Rory suggested.

"Or you could keep the engine running so it's ready for me to drive," Jess teased her.

"Again with the bad driving reference? If anyone deserves that kind of reputation it's you mister!" The words were out of Rory's mouth before she realised the implications of bringing up such a dark patch in their past.

All three of them were silent for a moment until Lorelaispoke.

"So, how about those Yankees?"

The mood reverted to its former state of joviality and Luke arrived with perfect timing with 3 plates piled high with their dinner.

"Come sit down Luke," Lorelai insisted. "I promise not to ask you for a vase for my flowers."

"Let me just get my plate and I'll be right back," Luke went back to the counter to collect his own meal. He looked around to see nearly everyone else had left or was almost finished. As he took his own seat next to Lorelaihe looked across the table at his nephew and Rory and smiled. "This is nice, this is good, a proper family thanksgiving."

"Never pegged you a such a sentimentalist Luke," Rory teased him. "You're right though, this is perfect."

"No place else I'd rather be," Jess agreed, squeezing Rory's hand in his.

"Let's toast to that," Lorelai raised her coffee mug and the others raised their glasses. "To all the things we have to be thankful for especially this little chosen family we've created."

They clinked their cups and drank for good luck and ate their food and enjoyed each other's company.

Later that night back at the inn Jess turned around in the desk chair where he'd been sat writing for the last hour or so to look over at Rory sound asleep on his pillow. He had everything he could ever have hoped to have right here in this room and he felt more content than he'd ever been in his life. He returned his pen to the page and wrote:

If ever someone were to ask him he couldn't have told them how long he'd sat there that night staring at his world while she slept. What he did know to be true was that he'd happily sit there for half a lifetime more. But what of the other half? Well he'd spend that by her side of course.

He laughed to himself as he put the pen down for the last time that night and crawled into bed beside Rory. Maybe he'd publish this book under a pen name, he didn't think he'd ever live it down if Matt and Chris discovered he was writing a silly romance novel.


	39. Chapter 39

_Christmas_

So much had happened in the weeks that passed between their Thanksgiving break and Christmas they'd barely had time to miss each other, much. Christmas Eve had arrived and Rory was about to step out of a taxi and walk through Truncheon's front door. Jess wasn't expecting to see her until tomorrow but she had decided it was her turn to surprise him and had booked a flight to Philadelphia instead of Hartford, confident that he would take her the rest of the way home tomorrow.

Much to her disappointment Jess wasn't there when she arrived, instead she was greeted by a sheepish looking Matt.

"Hi Rory, was Jess expecting you?" he asked although she suspected he already knew full well he wasn't.

"I thought I'd surprise him," she dropped her heavy load by the desk. "Has he just gone out?"

"You could put it that way," Matt hedged.

"And how exactly else might one put it?" Rory had a bad feeling about this.

"Great minds think alike?" Matt suggested.

"Matt, where is Jess?"

"On his way to Stars Hollow to surprise you," the sheepish look was back on Matt's face.

"And how long ago did he leave?"

"About 20 minutes," Matt checked his watch. "Maybe a little less."

Rory pulled her cellphone out of her purse and dialled Jess's number. He didn't answer so she hung up and tried again but still no answer. She tried one more time and was about to hang up when Jess's voice came over the line.

"This better be important, I'm driving and the light's going to turn green any second now."

"Turn around and come home Jess, I'm at Truncheon." Rory practically shouted down the line.

"You're here? In Philadelphia? At truncheon?"

"Yes yes and yes!"

"Don't move," Jess demanded and then cut her off.

18 minutes later Jess walked through the door to find Rory sat atop her suitcase, her other bags spread around her on the floor.

"Well ain't this a day of surprises?" he dropped his messenger bag on the floor next to hers.

"Well Matt did admit we both have great minds, that was pretty surprising," Rory jumped up from her uncomfortable seat and threw herself into Jess's arms.

"So you came to surprise me?"

"And you were on your way to surprise me."

"Could've been a very disappointing result for both of us." Jess looked at the luggage on the floor and back at Rory. "How much of this do you need for tonight?"

"Just those two I guess," Rory pointed to the overnight bag and her handbag.

"How about I pack the others in the car now to save us doing it in the morning," Jess suggested practically.

"Just let me get one more thing out first," Rory unzipped her work bag to retrieve a small parcel wrapped in blue and white snowflake paper and tied with a ribbon bow. She knew Jess was watching her as she put the gift into her overnight bag but this surprise was for tomorrow. That was the rule.

"You got everything you need?"

"Yeah, I really think I do," Rory kissed him passionately.

"Why don't you go on upstairs, I never did get around to changing the locks, your key should still fit," Jess smiled at her as he picked up her bags and stepped toward the door, on his way to his car.

"It's a good thing I went with Plan B to surprise you or I might have been waiting a very long time," Rory told him.

"And what exactly was Plan A?" Jess raised an eyebrow at her and she smiled back at him coyly.

"Give me 10 minutes and I'll show you."

Rory turned away from him and took the stairs two at a time. She unlocked the door with her key and let herself into Jess's apartment. She took her bags into the bedroom and quickly stripped off her coat and shoes and jeans but left her navy sweater on. In the bottom of her overnight bag was her Chilton skirt. She pulled it on and did up the zip, thankful it still fit her so perfectly. She was going to lie on the bed but thought better of it and grabbed a book from the top of Jess's corner pile and sat at his desk, pretending to read.

She heard his key in the lock and sat up a little straighter in the chair. When she heard him put his keys and bag down on the kitchen table she crossed her legs in anticipation. She could hear his footsteps across the carpet and made herself focus on the words on the page to calm herself as he reached the door.

"If this is Plan A then I'm glad I didn't miss it," Jess was behind her now, his mouth so close to her ear she could feel his breath as he read over her shoulder. " _Hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul, and sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all._ "

Rory closed the book and placed it gently on the desk before spinning the chair around slowly to face him. She felt shy and a little silly but she wasn't scared. She'd never done anything like this before but she felt safe with Jess and her embarrassment slipped away as soon as he bent down to kiss her.

"Geez Rory, you make me feel like I'm 17 years old again!" Jess let out a heavy sign and ran a hand through his hair. He looked deeply into her eyes then she watched as his gaze drifted down her body, lingering on her bare calves. She uncrossed her legs and stood up into his arms, reaching up to run her own fingers through the dark waves on his head. When he let out a soft groan she pushed him back onto the bed and straddled him.

"I don't recall this skirt being so short," Jess skimmed his hands up her thighs and under the hem.

"I don't recall you being so chatty," Rory kissed him into silence and let her body take over.

The room was almost completely dark when Rory woke up. Jess had one arm flung across her middle and one leg between hers. She wriggled closer to him to steal some more of his warmth.

"Rory, stay still," Jess urged her sleepily.

"But you're so warm and I'm so cold," she explained.

"As long as you're not trying to encourage me to go another round because as much as I love you and you sitting at my desk reading when I came in was the sexiest thing I've ever seen I just don't have it in me right now," he admitted tiredly.

"I'm getting kinda hungry," Rory's tummy rumbled predictably.

"What time is it?" Jess asked and Rory checked her phone to see.

"It's only just gone 6."

"Wow, seems later than that. How about I take you out somewhere for dinner?" Jess suggested.

"I'd like that but it's Christmas Eve, will anything be open?"

"I know at least one place that will be," Jess assured her.

"Well we only need one," Rory tried to get up but Jess wouldn't let her go.

"Just stay here for a few more minutes," he whispered into her hair.

"If you insist," Rory snuggled back into his warmth. "Hey Jess?"

"Yes Rory?"

"Can we just stay right here and order pizza?"

"Sounds good to me."

The alarm woke them at 6am and Rory cursed it for interrupting her dream. Jess turned it off but sat up on the side of the bed, readying himself to get up.

"No, it's too early! Come back to bed!" Rory protested as the bed suddenly became very cold without him in it to keep her warm.

"Rory, we need to leave in an hour or we'll be late." Jess was clearly going to be the grown up this morning and Rory pouted at him to consolidate his role. He leant across the bed to plant a kiss on her forehead, "Merry Christmas Rory."

"Merry Christmas Jess." Suddenly Rory was fully awake, it was Christmas! That meant present time. She jumped out of the bed taking the quilt with her prompting a protest from Jess. She opened the bottom drawer of his desk and retrieved the gift she'd stowed in there yesterday afternoon then returned to bed, wrapping the duvet around them both.

"This is for you," she smiled as she passed the present to him. He took it and smiled.

"Thank you Rory. You're sure you want to do this now? You don't want to wait until we're at your mom's?"

"I'm sure, go ahead, open it!" she was so excited to see his reaction. It was a simple gift really but she was confident he was going to love it.

"Just give me a second," Rory watched as Jess got out of bed and walked across the room and into the lounge. She heard him open his bag and a few moments later he'd returned with a gift for her in his hands. "This one's for you."

They sat back against their pillows, wrapped in the warm quilt, presents on their laps.

"You first," Rory insistedwayxhung hi intently as he undid the ribbon then tore the paper.

"I would've given you your copy of the photo sooner but I was always worried the frame would break in the post and you didn't seem the sort to go shopping for your own picture frame. That really was such a perfectly imperfect day wasn't it?" Jess kissed her in thanks.

"It really was. Explain the book to me. You know I already have this." Jess opened the cover as if he was looking for something.

"A Hemingway for a Rand, weren't they the terms? I figured it was my turn to fulfil my end of the deal. Your copy with your notes is safely in Stars Hollow keeping your Rand company and now you have my copy with my notes to keep my Rand company." she explained. "Hey, don't read them all now! It's my turn anyway."

Rory tore into the paper and laughed as she held up a book and a picture frame of her own.

"Huh, I guess Matt was right, our minds must be extraordinarily great!"

"Well, you said you wanted picture frames for your new desk and the book is so we can explore Providence together and find our own favourite places."

"Thank you Jess, I love them both. Please explain this picture to me though!" Rory couldn't contain her giggles any longer. It was so unlike him but so very him at the same time. "Who took this and how much did they pay you to sit still long enough to do so?"

"It was supposed to be on my book cover but I refused. Some friend of Matt's took it. Friendly guy, got me talking about Bowie, snapped my picture and now you have a copy. If you don't like it..."

Rory cut him off. "I love it Jess. I'm a little surprised considering I have exactly one photo of you and it's in that frame right there," she pointed to his gift from her, "and I had to work for it! This picture is beautiful. I'm glad this never made it onto your book or I'd be beating your admirers off with a stick!"

"Anonymity was my closing argument."

"I'm looking forward to spending lots of Christmas mornings with you," Rory put her gifts down and turned to Jess.

"I'm looking forward to spending every morning with you." Rory smiled at his words and kissed him softly but briefly.

"Time we were getting on the road I guess," she reminded him.

"At least we're travelling together this time, I'm sick of goodbyes."

"Only one more to go," Rory reassured him.

 ** _A/N so, I decided to do Christmas after all, in two parts as usual. I'm halfway through writing the next chapter and will have it up as soon as I get a chance to finish it. Thankyou all for your feedback and support. I do think the next chapter will be the last followed by a short epilogue which will leave my options open for a potential sequel down the track._**

 ** _The words Jess reads from the book are from Emily Dickinson. Rory was going to tease him about this but it didn't happen, maybe later._**

 ** _Last (completely irrelevant to this fic) thought - has anyone seen the film "Begin Again"? I just watched it on the weekend and the song "Like a Fool" really made me think of Rory and Jess at the end of S3. Beautiful, heartbreaking, raw, honest song. Let me know what you think if you check it out._**


	40. Chapter 40

They'd made good time to Stars Hollow and were only 20 minutes later than expected. Luke had insisted they stay above the diner this time as the inn was fully booked out and he was practically living at Lorelai's these days anyway. It suited Jess just fine and Rory seemed happy with the plan so they'd accepted his offer and were now carrying their bags through the empty diner and up the stairs to Jess's old home.

He watched as Rory unpacked a few items into his old drawers and sat on the old leather lounge to wait for her to be ready to go. The apartment was full of memories for him - some good, some not so good, some life altering. He'd never forget the shame he'd felt the day Luke finally kicked him out. He'd been right of course, Jess had broken all his rules and he had to go. Hindsight's a bitch. He didn't appreciate how good he had it back then. Living here with his uncle, having Rory for a girlfriend. He'd really blown it with both of them and yet here they both were, still loving him regardless.

Jess suddenly noticed Rory had stopped unpacking and was looking at him with a curious look on her face.

"Sad boy, what's the matter?" she came over and carefully sat herself on his lap, brushing his hair off his forehead.

"Just remembering a few things I'm not very proud of," he could hear his voice cracking and swallowed the feeling away.

" _The best teacher is experience,_ " Rory quoting Kerouac to him made him remember one of their first conversations back when this all began, well this beginning anyway.

"Rory, I do love you in December as I did in May," Jess held her close to him, kissing the tears that fell from her eyes for both of their regrets. They stayed there like that until the phone on the wall broke the silence. Rory untangled herself from Jess and answered it.

"Sure, we'll be right over." Rory spoke into the phone, hanging up quickly. "Are you ready?"

He heard the hidden question in her tone and nodded at her, his voice still and sincere as he told her, "yes, I'm ready now."

The Gilmore house looked like Santa's workshop had exploded inside it but Jess found himself smiling despite himself. He was still smiling after they'd threaded the popcorn and cranberry garlands and decorated the store bought Christmas cookies. He was happy. This was a Christmas unlike any he'd ever experienced before and, crazy as it all was, he was enjoying himself.

They were expected at the Gilmore mansion at 7 so they left Lorelai and Luke just after 5 to go back to the apartment and get changed for dinner. They took Rory's car because it was the most comfortable for four adults and Luke had drawn the short straw and was designated driver. Jess figured he probably shouldn't be drinking tonight anyway after making such a bad impression the first time around and offered to do it instead but Luke insisted, muttering something about 'nitwit juice' and 'my little pony' that he'd have to get Rory to interpret for him later.

The four of them stood together on the doorstep, waiting for someone to ring the bell.

"Lorelai, it's freezing out here and this suit wasn't exactly made for warmth," Luke prompted.

"Are you sure about that Luke because you look pretty hot in it?" Jess groaned out loud at Lorelai's observation and pressed the doorbell himself.

"I hope I don't come to regret that," he whispered to Rory as the door opened and a maid ushered them into the hall. She took their coats and directed them into the sitting room where Richard was waiting for them.

"Oh why Lorelai, don't tell me someone bought you an accurate timepiece for Christmas? Emily will be with us momentarily," Richard greeted his daughter. "I don't think you've ever been early to anything in your life."

"Does Rory count because you know she wasn't due for another 2 days so I was really early that day wasn't I?"

"Merry Christmas Lorelai," Richard conceded defeat but Jess could see the pride in his eyes at his daughter's quick wit. "Ah Rory, you are looking particularly lovely tonight and I assume this is Jess?"

Jess took a step closer to Rory's grandfather and offered his hand for him to shake. "Jess Mariano Sir, thank you for inviting me."

"Yes, I know your name young man. You're the writer. A very good one I might add. Please call me Richard. Your first work was not quite to my taste but I like to think I recognise talent when I see it and you young man definitely have a way with words. The Light and the Dark was quite a different experience for me altogether and I thoroughly enjoyed it, even recommended it to a few of my friends at the club. I hope to hear more about your future plans, I assume you're working on a follow up?" Jess didn't know what to say but was saved by Lorelai.

"Hey dad, maybe we could all take a seat and have a drink in our hand before Jess's shares the secrets of his success?"

"Oh, why yes of course, where are my manners? I'm not used to having a published author in my midst. Seems you've found yourself a good one there Rory." Richard nodded his approval while Jess took a seat next to Rory.

Jess felt rather than heard Emily enter the room. He had his back to her but he saw Luke tensing up and saw the way Lorelai squeezed his hand to calm him.

"Why hello everyone, apologies for not being here to greet you on your arrival, I was called to supervise something in the kitchen and it took longer than I had expected it to," Emily came to stand in the centre of the room. "Lorelai, Rory, Luke, you're all looking well, and this must be Jess? I'd say we've heard a lot about you but I'm not as adept a liar as my daughter so you'll have to forgive me if I don't." Emily smiled at him but he could tell she was assessing him.

"It's good to see you again Mrs Gilmore, thank you for inviting me," Jess wasn't opposed to a white lie especially when he was trying to make a good impression on his girlfriend's grandmother.

"Again? Am I to assume we've met before?" Emily looked at him curiously and he wished he'd left that one word out.

"Just the one time, it was only brief," he tried to ease her away from discovering his place in her memory. Let her believe he was a classmate of Rory's or a waiter or valet. He looked across at Lorelai who was smiling supportively and Luke was examining his fingernails.

"What's a person got to do to get a drink around here?" Lorelai quipped.

"Oh, yes, of course. I assume you'll have your usual? Rory? Luke, Jess, might I guess you'd both like _beer_?" Emily gave them no opportunity to respond but went directly to the drinks cart.

"Nothing for me thank you Emily, I'm driving tonight," Luke spoke for the first time since they had entered the Gilmore mansion.

"Or for me either," Jess followed his uncle's lead.

"Well surely you didn't bring two cars?" Emily queried as if the idea of two men turning down alcohol was absurd.

"It's more for the sake of solidarity," Jess explained.

"Well, then shall we _all_ abstain tonight for _solidarity_?" The way she said the word made Jess suddenly and inexplicably irritable. Maybe he'd spoken too soon and should've just taken the drink.

"Nooo, we drew straws mother, no need for the rest of us to miss out just because these two came up short." Lorelai insisted.

Drinks were served and stilted conversation was had and then it was time to move into the dining room for dinner. Jess was the last to take his seat and he looked across to see his uncle and Lorelai both looking at him strangely. Were they waiting for him to crack? Did they have money going on it? He glanced to his side to see Rory giving her mother a shrug. Interesting.

"Tell me Rory, where does the campaign bus take you in the new year?" Emily turned her attention to her granddaughter, oblivious to the silent conversation across the table. "Do you think you'll make time to visit Logan when you eventually reach the West Coast? Oh I do love San Francisco, I always thought it was such a charming city. You would have loved it there Rory."

"Actually Grandma, I have some news, Jess and I have some news to share with you," he could feel her eyes on him asking permission. He shrugged in reluctant agreeance, they had to be told sooner or later although it might have been nice to eat his dinner first.

"Well, don't keep us all in suspense, it's not polite." Emily's eyes were on him now. He wondered if she figured out where they'd met before yet. He smiled politely back at her and nodded to Rory to go ahead.

"I'll only be returning for 2 weeks then the bus will continue on without me as I make my way back to Providence." Rory began.

"Providence? Providence, Rhode Island?" Emily queried.

"Yes, I was offered a job there for the Providence Journal for after I graduated but I turned it down because I really wanted the Reston Fellowship. The woman that did take the job is going on maternity leave at the end of January and they offered me a contract to cover that period." Rory continued to explain.

"Why, congratulations are in order, that's quite a good newspaper Rory and I must admit, while I've enjoyed following your coverage of the campaign on the internet I do prefer my news the old fashioned way - served with black ink prints," Richard smiled warmly at Rory and Jess felt himself smiling a genuine smile back at him. He was beginning to understand why Rory adored him so much.

"Exactly Grandpa!" Rory beamed back at him.

"So you're moving to Providence to work for the Journal - that's your news but what is Jess's?" Emily's tone took the light out of Rory's eyes but she kept the smile in place.

"I'm also moving to Providence," he looked Emily directly in the eye as he delivered this ambiguous truth.

"Is your office moving?" Emily probed.

"No, just wanted to." Jess contained his smirk. He wondered if anyone had bets on how long it would take to make Emily explode? She was the one who brought up Logan at the dinner table, all's fair in love and war right?

"Well I find that incredibly irresponsible! What do you hope to do, live off your income as a _writer_?" Emily was appalled.

"Between Rory's income and mine and our savings we'll be able to rent a nice two bedroom apartment not too far from Rory's office," Jess informed her evenly.

"And whatever will you do all day?"

"Write? I am in the midst of my third novel. Those words don't write themselves," Jess shrugged again. He looked away from Emily for a moment and a quick glance around the table revealed four sets of amused eyes watching his every move.

"Will your next novel be of a more appealing genre? I never was one for dark drama and angst." Jess doubted Emily had even read his books, probably just judged them by their covers. It seemed she did that with people too.

"I thought I'd try my hand at romance this time," Jess looked across the table to see Lorelai choking on her water.

"Lorelai, must you make such a sound at the dinner table? I should at least be thankful I suppose that we don't have any proper guests here tonight to be offended by the degeneration of your manners," Emily scolded her daughter then turned her attention back to Jess. "So then you'll be the next Nicolas Sparks?"

"My style's more Hemingway-esque." Jess maintained his calm, easy smile.

"Now there's a writer I have a great deal of respect for," Richard broke the rally. Jess wondered if Lorelai had been keeping score.

" _All you have to do is write one true sentence_ ," Jess quoted the great author.

"Ah, yes, _and there is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man_ ," Richard responded with a gleam in his eye.

" _True nobility is being superior to your former self."_ Jess added.

" _It is good to have an end to journey toward,_ " Richard challenged him to continue their little game.

" _But it is the journey that matters in the end,_ " Jess completed the quote.

Lorelai was watching them amused, Luke was concentrating on his food and Rory was squeezing Jess's thigh under the table. Emily's face was wrinkled with the force of trying to figure out what was going on between the two men without giving away the fact she didn't know or deigning to ask to be enlightened. Jess had come here to try to make a good impression on Rory's grandparents and was now resigned to believe one out of two would do.

Jess turned back to Richard again, " _My aim is to put down on paper what I see and what I feel in the best and simplest way."_

" _The most essential gift for a good writer is a built in, shockproof, shit detector_." and with that quote Richard won this game and Jess burst out laughing as Emily belatedly interjected.

"Richard! It is bad enough that your daughter has no manners, must you act in such a way that convinces people she learnt them from you?" Emily put her cutlery down across her plate.

"It's a quote Grandma," Rory attempted to explain.

"A vulgarity written by someone famous makes it no less vulgar and no less unsuitable for the dinner table Rory," Emily was not to be swayed.

The mood had shifted and dessert was consumed in silence. Luke turned down the offer for coffee stating he had an early start in the diner the next day and Emily didn't even bother to argue.

"Well that was..." Lorelai started when they were all safely in the car and halfway home to Stars Hollow.

"Weird?" Rory suggested.

"Awkward?" Luke offered.

"Interesting?" was the best Jess could come up with.

"All of the above plus a little dash of amusing! I think my father really liked you Jess. That's good. That's really good. Rory is his precious angel and he's never been one to approve of any of her boyfriends before." Lorelai turned in her seat to look back at Jess.

"He seems like an interesting man. He invited me back sometime to examine his Hemingways. I think I'll make sure Emily's not home first though."

"Di..." Lorelai started.

"Mom, don't even!" Rory cut her off and he looked at her strangely.

"It was too easy anyway," Lorelai sighed in defeat, Jess was still confused. It had been a weird night and he wasn't keeping up anymore.

"See you guys in the morning," Luke told them as they got out of the car in front of the diner.

"You were lying about the early opening, right?" Jess confirmed.

"You're welcome to open early if you like, I'm planning on sleeping in," Luke smiled at his nephew. "Merry Christmas Jess, it's been good to have you here."

"Yes, it really has Jess," Lorelai agreed. "Merry Christmas."

Rory held his hand tightly in hers as she waved the car off. She let out a huge sigh of relief then turned to him, kissing him for the first time in hours.

"I've been wanting to do that all night," she confessed.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"How about we get inside out of the cold and I'll show you what I've been wanting to do to you all night?" Jess suggested.

"Maybe," Rory hedged.

"Maybe?" Jess raised his eyebrows questioningly.

"Well, I'm rather curious to confirm one detail about the evening first." Rory looked at him smugly. The ball was always in her court, didn't she realise that by now?

"And what detail might you be referring to?" He pulled her closer into his body as the cold night air began to chill him through his jacket.

"Are you really writing a romance novel?" Rory was studying him intently.

"I guess you could say I've grown weary of the dark drama and angst," he half admitted.

"Kinda makes the Emily Dickinson love poems by the bed make a little more sense," Rory laughed.

"I brought it with me in case I needed a little more inspiration..." Jess would never tire of watching the blush creep into Rory's cheeks.

"Why are we still standing out here in the cold then?" Rory let him go and grabbed the key from over the door. She unlocked the door and stepped into the diner, beckoning him to follow her and so he did.

In the very early hours of the morning, her limbs still tangled with his, the sheets wrapped around them both, keeping them warm as the afterglow slowly faded, Rory lifted her head from Jess's chest and turned to look up at him.

"This is how it was supposed to be," she whispered into the dark.

"This is how it always will be," Jess promised her.

 _ **A/N Well that was a lot longer than I'd planned! I hope you enjoyed it. This is the last chapter however there is still just a short epilogue to go which I will hopefully finish and post tomorrow.**_

 _ **The quotes in italics are borrowed from Jack Kerouac and Ernest Hemingway.**_

 _ **Thankyou Jessica for your guest reviews and to the unnamed reviewers too, I really do appreciate you taking the time to read my story and share your thoughts on it with me.**_


	41. Chapter 41

**Epilogue**

Jess watched as Rory hesitated, her hand held in mid air, the key frozen on its way to unlocking the door to their new apartment, their new home.

"So we're really doing this aren't we?" he spoke aloud the words that he was almost certain she was thinking.

"Yep, sure looks that way. Not getting cold feet are you?" he caught the hopeful twinkle in her eyes as they searched his for his truth.

"Nope, but that could just be because I'm wearing my good boots today," he teased her.

"As opposed to your bad boots?" She asked, feigning confusion.

"I'm not changing my mind Rory if that's what you're trying to ask me. I don't want you to think I'm about to propose or anything because honestly, I think we're both too young for that anyway and I'm not even sure where I stand on the whole concept of needing a signed contract to prove your commitment to another person. What I do want to say is that this, moving in with you, living with you, this is a big deal for me. I've never done this before. I'm pretty well trained on the whole toilet seat down, no stubble in the sink front but you might get sick of me when I get into one of my writing trances and don't surface for days at a time. I just need you to know that that's part of who I am and it doesn't mean I'm avoiding you it just means I'm working and I'll come back to you soon." Jess told her honestly.

"Hey, I come with my own set of bad habits too Jess. How do you know you're not going to get sick of me? This is going to take some getting used to for both of us. We can write a new set of rules if you want? This is a big deal for me too. I love you Jess and while I'm not ready for you to propose to me any time soon it's not because I don't want to be with you or because I don't think this could be forever because honestly Jess, I think this just could be. Forever I mean."

"Forever huh?"

"Yep," Rory smiled up at him and in that moment he could see it too. Forever. Sounded like a pretty nice concept to him.

Jess took the key from her hand and unlocked the door then turned the handle to open it. Before she could step inside he lifted her off her feet and carried her over the threshold.

"Jess Mariano you really are such a romantic aren't you?!" Rory exclaimed.

"Well, what can I say? I guess you just bring out the worst in me," Jess kissed the teasing smile off her face and kicked the door shut behind him.

Their forever had only just begun.

 ** _A/N so that's it from me, for now. I realise there are a few different definitions of what an epilogue is but I chose to go with the wrapping things up version. I've really enjoyed writing this story but I did feel this was a good place to end and by leaving it here I still have the option of writing a sequel down the track of their life together in Providence._**

 ** _My sincerest thanks to every single one of you who took the time to read this story and especially those who took the time to review and share your thoughts (and read my rambling replies), it really is so incredibly encouraging to me. Your support has been amazing especially jordana60, DrewSaywer and sonckad who've been with me from my first attempt at fan fic._**

 ** _If you haven't already and you have the time to waste please consider checking out my other fics. All 3 are literati and include a one shot, a short shot and a long multi chapter. The long one is a very different story to this one but I like to think the angst is well balanced with the good stuff._**

 ** _Anyway, I'll wrap this up now before the note becomes longer than the chapter :)_**

 ** _Hope you've all enjoyed the ride as much as I have._**


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